To be shocked that my good friend, 37, is seeing a 66 year old lady?

I’m not surprised you’re shocked tbh, I would be too.

I think there is something wrong with it, a 20 + year age gap is always bad news in my opinion, doesn’t matter if the older partner is male or female. Different stages in life and power imbalance. Also just ikky (I’m 44 it would be like me dating a 18-20 year old, eurgh)
However this is your friend’s business, as long as you don’t feel he’s being abused or anything it’s up to him. Don’t get involved

I'm fascinated by this! Does the older woman look like a gran? Most 66 year old women do. Does she have work done? Did your friend say what excatly the attraction is? Has he been with an older woman before.

But this is MN so someone will be along soon to tell you £180k is nothing

Can you explain why this is gross. I knew a married couple with a 26 year age gap. They made each other happy. Surely that's all that matters?

Increasingly OP sounds like he's actually the 'friend'.

You're sounding like David Cameron now with your 'calm down dear.'

Also, women who come on here to talk about sex don't generally do it to get a little frisson, like most of the men do.

As I say, the men on here.

but no it it’s not remotely common for men in their thirties to be physically sttracted to mid 60s and older women. We do see more the other way round, but that’s a different situation on why a woman in her thirties would get with a man in his late 60s.

Yes, the only time you ever see it is when the older partner is very famous and very rich- and that applies to both genders.

In the average population, it's not common at all, which is a good thing. I am 49, that would be like me dating a 19 year old which is gross to me 🤮

I had a work colleague with a son of 18, who began dating a 48 year old woman. My colleague wanted to scratch her eyes out.

Yes surprised the amount of posters writing it’s common, it’s not, we all know it’s not, reads like some form of self soothing where older women get to think all these young guys fancy them. And I’m 57, and would be considered attractive, so I’m not going to be bothered either way.

but no it it’s not remotely common for men in their thirties to be physically sttracted to mid 60s and older women. We do see more the other way round, but that’s a different situation on why a woman in her thirties would get with a man in his late 60s.

A 30 year age gap is NOT common. I dont know anyone in an age gap relationship with that large a gap. I am not saying its wrong, but its seriously not "common" for men in their 30s to be dating women in their 60s 😆

He obviously has a sexual attraction to mature women which is a not particularly uncommon fetish, and her to younger men. Good for them.

It’s a large gap but so what. I think it’s odd when the younger party is under 25 but above that it doesn’t feel exploitative.

I had a friend in school who started dating a 57 year old at 19. They’re still together now 14 years later and have 2 young children. I think she was seeking a father figure after hers died when we were 12.

Good for them. They're both having fun, not hurting anyone, and not letting any outdated mores or bullshit rules about '50%+7' get in their way.

The guy is no spring chicken. He is entering his 40s in 3 years time.

It’s different of course if it was a teen or maybe early 20s, and an older person with that age gap I probably would be more concerned (if it was my daughter involved for example).

Otherwise, the lady sounds like she is living her best life. Good on her!

Pearls would be clutched in horror. How dare people have a consensual relationship!! Outrageous!! Jail them immediately 🤣🤣

Only the ones that don't learn from their mistakes!

Maybe older ladies are his thing? Yeah it's a bit shocking but the younger man/older lady thing is really normalised now so prepare to see more of it I think!

Does he have kids? Does he want to?

Do you and him have any "history"?

Whatever.

Seems to be working for them. Be happy for your friend.

I don't agree. If there is genuine love there & why shouldn't there be, age shouldn't be an issue. If it was its like saying my father is now very old & needs my help which is not something I expected or desire to do. If the couple care enough for each other it's their choice as to what they are happy to deal with. If we are fortunate enough to live into old age as a happily married couple they simply care for each other. It's the same with a couple with an age gap. It's called caring.

That’s because it was an accident. Your cousin may feel differently if his wife was 20-30 years older than him and he’s pushing his old lady wife around in a wheelchair due to age related illness. Yes, she couldn’t help it but he could be thinking he was a bit naive to think the age gap didn’t matter when they first got together!