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To be shocked that my good friend, 37, is seeing a 66 year old lady?

359 replies

darksideofthetoon · 28/06/2026 19:59

Had a few beers with a good friend recently and got a bit tipsy and we got into his dating life. He told me that he’s been seeing a 66 year old grandmother. He is only 37 for reference. They met via online dating.

To be clear, there is nothing wrong with this but I’m just a bit shocked to be honest. He says that they enjoy each other’s company and there is no intention of it developing into anything more.

My friend has always dated younger women and not short of female attention at all.

It’s all good right?

OP posts:
AlgaeDreams · 29/06/2026 19:27

riversofjoy · 29/06/2026 19:24

Nope- the OP referenced a 30 year age gap so its accurate- 18- 48=-30 years

But there is a huge maturity and life experience difference between 18 and early 30s.
It's not really comparable other than mathematically.

riversofjoy · 29/06/2026 19:27

Would I date a 20 year old nope! But Mid 30s upwards then most definitely. As long as he doesn’t want children I’m good to go.

Genuine query- how many 20 year olds have asked you out? because thats what the OP is referring to- a 30 year age gap

shuggles · 29/06/2026 19:25

@Beeloux Imagine when he’s 50 and she’s pushing 80. Most woman I know who have went for older men is because they’re rich. To me, it’s very unattractive for a man to be chasing a woman for money.

I don't understand why that's an issue. I'm finding more and more that the women around me make far more than I do, so I would certainly appreciate it if I was in a relationship with a rich woman and she was able to look after me with her finances. Why would I not want that?

AlgaeDreams · 29/06/2026 19:25

Beeloux · 29/06/2026 19:18

Personally I would find it weird as fuck. I’m late twenties and briefly dated a guy 3 years younger. It seemed very weird and I didn’t like it.

Imagine when he’s 50 and she’s pushing 80. Most woman I know who have went for older men is because they’re rich. To me, it’s very unattractive for a man to be chasing a woman for money.

But it's been pointed out that money isn't an issue for either of them.

I was a single Mum at 21 and always ended up dating 8-10 years older because single men in their 20s seemed so immature.

I'm 50s and have had comments from younger guys - but unless there was a huge friendship first then probably not. Then again older guys seem to be married and not getting it at home, so probably not either 😂

They go on hikes. What's not to love?

*Note to self, buy hiking boots...

riversofjoy · 29/06/2026 19:24

Deepf60 · 29/06/2026 19:13

He's twice that age so your question is irrelevant! Why do people get so concerned about age gaps?

Nope- the OP referenced a 30 year age gap so its accurate- 18- 48=-30 years

hoxtonbabe · 29/06/2026 19:24

Deepf60 · 29/06/2026 19:13

He's twice that age so your question is irrelevant! Why do people get so concerned about age gaps?

Exactly. I don’t even see what the problem is here, good on her I say!

The fact of the matter is no one is an impressionable teenager in this situation. I am 50 and for me to find a man my age attractive is extremely rare (be it physically or mentally) so I have 0 intentions of dating one.

Would I date a 20 year old nope! But Mid 30s upwards then most definitely. As long as he doesn’t want children I’m good to go.

BlueFahrenheit · 29/06/2026 19:24

Good for them. They're probably having amazing sex, too.

Dillydollydingdong · 29/06/2026 19:24

If it's time well spent and they're enjoying themselves, where's the problem? It might carry on for ten days or ten years, does it matter?

Loverofoldfilms · 29/06/2026 19:21

LasagneGoblin · 28/06/2026 20:10

Some men like much older women (Wayne Rooney anyone?) Some older women still have a raging libido and a lot of men their own age can't keep up. Cheers to them both, hope they're at it like rabbits on the daily.

You made me laugh so much, almost spat out my tea.

Beeloux · 29/06/2026 19:18

Personally I would find it weird as fuck. I’m late twenties and briefly dated a guy 3 years younger. It seemed very weird and I didn’t like it.

Imagine when he’s 50 and she’s pushing 80. Most woman I know who have went for older men is because they’re rich. To me, it’s very unattractive for a man to be chasing a woman for money.

LakieLady · 29/06/2026 19:16

I'm 70, this has given me hope that sex may not necessarily be a thing of the past for me!

Deepf60 · 29/06/2026 19:16

Goodmorningeveryone26 · 28/06/2026 20:07

Really?? I’d have thought it wasn’t common at all ! Honestly I think it’s absolutely gross. I’d think it was weird too, OP, but I probably wouldn’t start a thread about it. Might have a little gossip with another friend who didn’t know him though, just to process my thoughts. Yes, none of your business blah blah blah but I’d be taken aback as well, honestly

Oh for goodness sake get a grip....they are happy, the age gap doesn't bother them that's all that matters.

AlgaeDreams · 29/06/2026 19:15

darksideofthetoon · 28/06/2026 20:10

Without going into details, they’ve got to know each other very well in bed. My friend doesn’t do platonic stuff. He lit up like a Christmas tree when I asked him how it was in bed.

Ahaha this made me laugh!

Good for them!

ProudCat · 29/06/2026 19:14

Two words: Emma Thompson.

Deepf60 · 29/06/2026 19:13

riversofjoy · 29/06/2026 18:50

You dont think a 48 year old dating an 18 year old is gross?

🤮

He's twice that age so your question is irrelevant! Why do people get so concerned about age gaps?

TheCurious0range · 29/06/2026 19:08

Sounds like it suits them both, financially both very comfortable and independent, neither looking for commitment, but want a fun time and lots of sex which from your friend's reaction is what they are getting.

Why not, who's it hurting?

I think the older you get the less age gaps matter, especially if there is no other power dynamic going on. That's what makes the much older man much younger woman dynamic an ick, often the men are loaded but not blessed physically and the women are beautiful but not wealthy so it feels transactional. This seems a more equal footing just with an age gap

Jane143 · 29/06/2026 19:07

OriginalUsername2 · 29/06/2026 19:00

Personally I feel the same way. I just can’t relate to fancying someone young enough to be your child or old enough to be your parent.

What if it’s Harry Styles?? I would!

JohnofWessex · 29/06/2026 19:06

I used to work on a ship where the bosun had the proverbial 'girl in every port'

Needless to say an average day was a lot of ports!

He was in his mid 60's and ages of the women varied from mid 20's to mid 80's

LOVETHISCHAT · 29/06/2026 19:06

Would you be equally shocked if he were a woman dating an older man?

RosieSpring · 29/06/2026 19:06

Manifoldoptions · 29/06/2026 19:05

Not read whole thread but I presume she’s loaded??

OP said he's well off and the woman is comfortable too.

Jane143 · 29/06/2026 19:06

TinyTempest · 28/06/2026 20:01

He says that they enjoy each other’s company and there is no intention of it developing into anything more.

So why were they both looking for a hook up on a dating site?

Dating sites are not just for hook ups. I know several people who had long term and marriage on there

Confuserr · 29/06/2026 19:05

Sounds a bit like you fancy him tbh.

But aside from that, I would be a little surprised. Although my newly single aunty who's 58 is currently* shagging a late 20s man and it seems to work for them so I wouldn't say it was totally unheard of. No financial benefit for him btw, given the sugar mummy comments. Doesn't sound like they go out much tbh.

*well you know, not CURRENTLY, she's probably watching Japan v Brazil

Manifoldoptions · 29/06/2026 19:05

Not read whole thread but I presume she’s loaded??

OriginalUsername2 · 29/06/2026 19:00

BeMintFatball · 28/06/2026 20:48

Well I’m 60 and honestly couldn’t shag anyone young enough to be my son. It’s very icky

Personally I feel the same way. I just can’t relate to fancying someone young enough to be your child or old enough to be your parent.

RosieSpring · 29/06/2026 18:58

DaringQuoter · 29/06/2026 18:54

I’m very interested in this post because I have a female friend who is 86 and is in a very physical relationship with a man of 47. She feels like it’s her birthday and Christmas all rolled into one, but I am extremely anxious for her. I guess I just can’t imagine why he would be attracted to someone much older than his mother.
he has told her that “0ther people don’t matter “ but I’m sure her daughters are concerned. Obviously they’re older than he is. I wonder what Mumsnetters would make of this!

It really depends, the OP said her friend is well off and the woman he is seeing has no worry issues. Is there a discrepancy in money between your friend and her friend?