To feel sad about this?

Is the issue here letting go of childhood nostalgia and understanding that Christmas won't always be the same.
Surely at some point you would have to experience Christmas differently as an adult.

You have plenty of time to now start planning, so turn it around and do something different. Start your own traditions.

Why would the OP be a troll? I’m curious as to what your thought process is regarding that.

Good for your friend! 🥇 However, if she was self pitying she would be bloody in her right to do so! Also, you don’t know what she’s truly feeling inside. You only know what she’s choosing to tell you.

And perhaps the OP would actually want to spend her Christmas with her family, not somebody else’s family or completely alone. She’s completely valid to feel upset.

Why do they charge so much? I'd never take a third for a monthly wage from a dc. Wtf is wrong with them when they can afford flights to aus! I mean obviously that's why if they're raking in 7k a year from you.

What's your relationship like with them normally, are they nice and supportive is this a blip?

YANBU to feel sad - you feel how you feel and that’s ok.

I do think you’re being a bit over sensitive though. However, you’ve only been told today so you need time to get used to the idea.

If it was me, I’d be asking work for some additional leave if possible and spend the savings and go. You’re young, it may be the only opportunity to do this. But then, I have never really taken the most sensible option and would rather have the experience! Savings can be built back up again.

I’m not sure if this is sarcasm??

Im 5”3 and I put up a 7ft tree on my own.., you know they come in parts that you just fit together and you can stand on a chair if you need to….

When will you have enough saved to move out?

If you are paying your parents so much then why not move out and rent somewhere in a house share?

What is Christmas usually like in your house?

I completely understand why you're upset, I would feel exactly the same. And for those posters saying why should your brother be the one to be alone at Christmas, if you choose to move to the other side of the world then you have to accept you won't see family as often. The onus is not on the people left behind to come to you.
I'm sorry this has happened and it does sound like your parents favour your brother.

Well you are moving out anyway. You will be living on your own. Not with your parents. They might decide to go away every year from now on.

It’s probably wrong for me to comment because Christmas is not a big deal at all in our house so this would not bother me, however my good friend is OBSESSED with Christmas and family and everything that surrounds it so this would devastate her too. She is in her 40s and if her parents said they were going abroad for Christmas she would go MAD. She would definitely go with them though, feck the savings.

You’re getting a hard time. Your parents are favouring your brother. It’s clear as day to me. I would never ever ever leave my child at home to jet off to see my other child at Christmas. I have an adult child and younger ones. I treat them the same. I love them the same.

Get out op. Your own place. Your own control. You may start to see more of the same patterns in their behaviour when you get some distance. You’d be very welcome on the stately homes thread on relationships.

OP, when you get your own house, will you expect your mum and dad and your brother to spend it at your (hopefully warm, non-cold) house?

How will you get a six foot real Christmas tree delivered to your new house? I hope you're factoring in this extra cost into your savings?

Have you spent every Christmas with your parents? Never seeing a partner's parents on the big day? How would you factor this in, if you have a partner now or in the future?

I was home alone one year. I knew in advance that would be the case.
DP was away and it’s also my birthday.

i was sad and miserable in the run up and felt very sorry for myself.
Then I thought fuck this. It’s what I make it.
I got Chinese food from the supermarket and stuffed myself on Christmas Day. I then got tipsy and did all my favourite selfish things.

IT WAS BLOODY BRILLIANT!!!!!!!

Would do again in a heartbeat!
Best Christmas ever

I was with your parents until you said they were looking at business or first class flights. I have a daughter who lives in Australia, so I know how prohibitively expensive these are. It looks like your parents are happy to spend tens of thousands of pounds on luxury travel but are not willing to pay for your travel. I can understand why you're upset.

Personally, whenever we go visit our daughter, we always offer to pay the fare for our other two adult children. We are not rich and could never afford business or first class, but would help them out because we want to spend time together as a family.

But OP is an adult working FT, has no children, no major outgoings and living cheaply.

Chances are she’s got more disposable income than her parents do.

At what age do you stop paying for your adult children.

I don’t think they should feel guilty for having an amazing experience and paying extra to ensure they’re not miserable for hours in the air.

I’ve been on my own a couple of Christmases and I’ve worked quite a few. It’s just a day.

You're attitude is also 'cunty' but perhaps you can't see that. Please don't respond to me again.

I had a solo Christmas last year and didn't once moan about it or think I'd have to sit in a cold, dark room without a Christmas tree.

@Letsgetonwithit ive had quite a few Christmas on my own because my parehts were living overseas and my more or less all my family has decided to move abroad 🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️, I was about tge OP’s age too

And you know what? Christmas was hard. There was this lingering feeling of sadness, of being left behind.
Did I ‘get on with it’? well yes of course I did.
I still didn’t have a Christmas tree (couldn’t see the point) or a Christmas meal (no way I was going to cook a Christmas meal just for one.)
It was a day like all the others, whilst being aware most people were with family, likeky enjoying themselves.
The OP is sad. She is entitled to feel sad and unhappy about it.

You also said...

In the nicest possible way, grow up, OP

That's really helpful 👍

In the nicest possible way, stop being a knob.

I wonder if this post is what your sadness is really about - you feel like your brother is favoured maybe? Or that your brother and parents share an interest in travel and you feel like the odd one out?

A harsh reality of life is that adults aren't actually owed anything, so you have to live within your means. Your dp are allowed to spend their own money on themselves. I wonder if they see you as making a choice to prioritise your savings, so don't want to use their savings to subsidise you. That's not unreasonable I think.

It sounds like you are happy and confident in your choices, which is great. But, you have to live with the consequences too. I wouldn't spend that much on a short holiday either, but making that choice you have to cope with staying at home.

I don't understand the tree concern. Of course you can put a tree up yourself, I have many times. And of course you can fit a tree in even a small car, because you can get a smaller tree if you need. Head over to the Christmas board if you need practical advice in any aspect of Christmas prep you haven't had to do before!