To feel sad about this?

She pays her parents £600 for rent and £300 for food. That sounds like the opposite of being fortunate and pampered. They are probably making a profit out of her if their mortgage is paid off.

You have time to make an alternative plan..

Youre living g at home, do you pay any bills or rent? If not then you're incredibly fortunate and pampered. Thai is just one fo those times you need to choose which to sacrifice a Xmas or a house. Is it the first time anything hard has ever happened to you?

I think the way your parents have talked about their plans is awful, and I can fully understand why you feel so upset. You need to communicate that you are happy for them to be taking such an amazing trip and that you have looked into it, but that your limited leave and need to travel at peak times means you can’t afford to join. Then see how they respond. More generally, I do wonder whether the extent to which you are saving to buy a home is the best use of your limited income at your age, given how it is impacting your life. It might be worth renting with a friend to create a better life for yourself even if it costs a bit more. Is your current job where you see yourself long term? Or do have other plans for your future career? I think something like rebel finance school (available free on YouTube) and some of their related content with ideas to increase income could be empowering for you. There is also a free rebel business school available online to help people set up businesses or side hustles. Wishing you all the best.

How old are you op? Unless you're a teenager this seems very overdramatic. You love at home and are with your parents everyday, they just want to go for a weeks holiday. You can get a Xmas tree alone, just have a real one delivered or buy a reusable and have it delivered and assemble it.

It costs her £900 per month to live with her parents. £600 for rent and £300 for food. As I have said in previous posts, as their mortgage is probably paid off, they are actually making a profit from their own daughter.

I think that’s pretty bad of your parents . Your brother is only going in September , he will barely have settled. Surely they could have waited a year to give you a chance to save/plan. I have three grown children and would never leave one alone like they are doing over Christmas, on the plus side, in future you can plan all your festivities to suit yourself with no regard for them as they age . Try to plan a night out or two over the holiday and embrace a perfect day totally self centred on Christmas day

I don’t get why everyone’s telling the OP to grow up. If I was in my 20s, 40s or 60s the prospect of a Christmas spent alone whilst my family were all together on the other side of the world would be upsetting.
Just an idea OP, maybe you could treat yourself to a solo trip elsewhere if staying at home will be depressing and Oz is too expensive. Maybe some winter sun in Morocco or Tenerife?

Have you actually told them you’re not going because up thread you said you said you would go, then realized you couldn’t afford it? Don’t try to make your parents feel guilty - start making your own plans. How about a stay in a hotel where you’ll be a part of the celebrations over a couple of days? Or once they know what’s happened your friends might invite you over. Don’t wallow in self- pity - look at a house share with people similar to you. Yes keep saving but maybe relax a bit or think about getting a job that pays more, move somewhere where housing is cheaper perhaps. I’m sure your parents aren’t deliberately trying to make you excluded - they’re probably just excited about the trip. They may also be planning to give you back some of your rent when you buy a house.

OP spends £300 on her own food. As her parents are retired, I assume that their mortgage is paid off so they are actually making a profit from OP's £600 rent.

Her brother is obviously their favourate child as they reduced his rent so he could save to go to Australia but won't reduce OP's rent so that she can save up for a house deposit more quickly.

Bet your brother was cursing them in his mind when they said they were visiting for two months of a year long trip. He was probably looking forward to living it up in the hostels with the other travellers.

The way that they are talking is disappointing and the fact they were charging him less rent so he could save to travel is quite telling. I can't imagine charging my kids differently unless maybe as a % of take home.

I think I'd try and consider putting a few plans on place. It's not ideal and I know you must feel really hurt, but it's in your power to make the best of it. Have a look at any charities that might want a volunteer for a few hours, mention your solo Christmas to your friends, plan some fancy food and a couple of films if you are alone for the day, maybe get a small potted tree to make things feel festive.

You might be surprised with your friends. Not everyone has a fun family Christmas, and even if they do, someone might be up for joining you in the eve. Or someone may invite you round for Christmas dinner. Or you could see if anyone fancies a boxing day walk. It can be a lot to spend that much time with family.

In my 20s I knew a few people that would get together as they would otherwise be alone and I used to join them in the evening sometimes (when my parents would inevitably have fallen asleep in front of a film).

Ouch - the harsh realities of adult life. What an exciting adventure for your parents to be planning an extended trip to Australia. Please try to be happy for them.
At some time in most families the 'Christmas bubble' gets burst, as children grow into adults and move elsewhere, start relationships or have children, that changes the dynamics and considerations. The first one is always the toughest but as you have lots of advance notice, you've got lots of time to plan.
As others have said, there are many charity and church Christmas events that you could volunteer at - there's so much to be gained from helping the homeless, or those who would otherwise be alone. Your support would I'm sure be very welcome. You may also find there are friends or acquaintances who will also be alone, so you have an option of organising something with them - either lunch out or you host.
Take some time to get your head around a different Christmas, and once you've got by the initial disappointment, get your mind in a positive place so you can plan the best alternative Christmas.
I've had a few Christmases alone for various reasons, and it's actually been ok. And you get to choose what to watch - or not watch - on Christmas Day TV!!
I hope you find your peace and can own and enjoy a different type of Christmas.

Yes, you absolutely are allowed to be saddened by this - but then you pick yourself up and make your own plans. There are plenty of charities who would love a hand on Christmas Day - make it completely different.

£72K for a deposit? I know the SE is expensive in places but I'm sure there are places that aren't quite that expensive?? If you don't plan and save for a goal then it will never be attained.

Say what now? I think 2 or 3 years should do the trick!

If £72K is a 5% deposit then that's a house worth well over a million. Not your usual first time purchase.

You are an adult and your parents have given you plenty of notice. Most people I know don’t spend Christmas with their parents. I think I’ve only spent Christmas with mine twice since I turned 20 (I’m in my forties now).

Do you give your parents money each month to pay towards bills, food, etc? If you don’t, maybe they feel that you’ve received plenty from them financially and now it’s time to spend time with your brother if he hasn’t received as much from them.

I would recommend spending the day volunteering somewhere and keep yourself busy. Book things to do in the run up while they’re away and plan things to do afterwards.

I understand saving but you need to find time and money to have some fun too.

£600 pcm savings x 12 months each year is just £7200 towards a property.

Surely you wd need 10 years savings even to buy a modest house in the south East and by that time the properties may have increased in price?

I doubt it can be achieved to be honest. Like many young people.

So your salary goes mostly on savings?
Any reason you couldn’t fund yourself a return flight for a 2 week stay over Xmas and new year?

I have a 21 year old son and a 19 year old daughter and I can’t imagine purposefully leaving one of them alone at Christmas. I feel very sad for you. But as others have said try to make plans elsewhere if you can. Or just accept that this Christmas will be different and plan accordingly. Do they know how hurt you are? Has your brother not thought to mention it either?

Has it sunk in completely with them that you aren’t going.? Are they just over excited by the idea at the moment and not really thinking about the logistics or you? Or is your DB the golden child?

Sounds like you are pretty much paying market rent for a house share so if it is obvious your parents favour your DB then I would start looking to move out.

I think your parents going on about a ‘family’ Christmas if they know full well you can’t go and it’s finances/leave that is stopping you joining them rather than the fact you don’t want to go is rude.

My FIL continually talks about ‘all the grandchildren’ but actually means only the children from part of the family and doesn’t include ours in that (and ours are full blood so not a step issue) So will message DH that he has been to visit ‘all’ the grandchildren but he hasn’t seen our DC. It’s so rude. Very rarely see him now because of the different treatment

I can understand that you feel a bit sad about being alone at Christmas. But there are many things that you could do, from meeting up with friends, travelling yourself or volunteering at a local event.
The biggest silver lining, is that in the future, you don’t need to feel guilty about not being at their beck and call, when they want you to spend Christmas with THEM. They’ve given you permission to suit yourself, which might nit sound much to you right now, but give it a couple of years, when you have a partner/ family of your own, you’ll be very grateful that this happened.

Sorry you are going to be on your own at Christmas OP. Try to do it differently, I’ve had many Christmases alone. Do not waste any of your savings on going just stay at home as a home is more important.

I don’t think your parents are treating you that well at all. the sooner you have enough to move out I would say the better. Your brother should not be paying less than you that’s really unfair.

Your parents are asking for too much rent imho. A quarter of your wage would be ample. For comparison my DC was paying a quarter of their wage but that included food as well and no travel costs. Otherwise it would have been a quarter after travel. Currently signed off sick sadly due to work related stress so I’m charging nothing at all, paying for all the food and have cleared their overdraft. As I want them to feel better as soon as they can. That’s what parents, or in my case mums, are for and do (mine never did).

as a side note when you have your own home and one year you don’t see them as you have other plans they can lump it after treating you like that.

if you need to have a good cry get it all out OP 💐

@N0ChildrenYet Surely you must realise it’s incredibly normal- in fact probably standard- for families to holiday separately once children are in their late 20s? I’m surprised you were upset! I didn’t holiday regularly with my parents once I was early 20s. I still had occasional trips with them but those were the exception rather than the norm.

I’m on holiday right now and our 20 yo old is with us- this is the first trip we’ve had together in quite some time as nowadays she enjoys holidays with friends and her partner. I’m not saying it’s wrong for people in their 20s to holiday regularly with their parents but it’s certainly a bit unusual, I would have thought.

You get that 'mortified' means 'dying of embarrassment', right?