AIBU to resent my husband’s weight loss and his mum’s comments?

I would happily tell her about my DH whilst telling her if she ever mentions your weight again you won’t talk to her! That would shut her up! How dare she!!

Call me a petty b*tch but I'd totally "let slip" he's on the jabs. 🤣

I cannot get over the fact he won’t admit to taking WL injections to his mother.

I lost 3 st doing no exercise. A gym is to get you fit

Your DH should stop sabotaging your efforts by ordering pizzas etc. No one can resist that sort of food.

I don't think there's any science behind your assertion @Dahliadaily. I eat pizza and sometimes even choose it, but I can't tell you how many times I have declined it.

Yeah I don’t understand this either. Mounjaro enables people to eat what they want and to feel full and satisfied with much smaller portions. Why do you resent this?

There is no reason why he should stop taking a medication which is working for him, so I don’t get the nasty “he will put it all back on” comments.

Obesity is a serious condition. Treating serious health conditions with medication is a perfectly legitimate choice.

I agree that nobody should be pressuring OP into taking WLI if she’s happy with her current size, but being bitter about her DH becoming healthier seems odd.

Why do so many posters think he'll be coming off the jabs? OP has said nothing to suggest that. If he stays on long term, as many people plan to, it is actually possible that he will continue to lose and then maintain by eating smaller quantities of crap. I'm not saying this is a good idea, but it's one of the potential outcomes here, and OP does need to be aware of and prepared for that. He is BU to give all the rest of the family so much shit, but it's up to him what he feeds himself with.

I wouldn't tell her about Dh's WLI, but next time she makes a comment at you, just say "I'm losing weight the natural way, not like many others" with a coy smile.
That way, it might plant the seed in her mind and she can ask her son herself.

I agree with this, yours is the better approach op. People often don't realise how important exercise is, especially strength training.

Op you will be slimmer than dh by the time he comes off the jabs and gains it back again. Plus healthier!

What you're probably feeling is threatened as she is misunderstanding you. You are getting healthy in a healthy way, but she thinks you should be able to get the results your husband is getting, without knowing he is doing it in an unhealthy way. He also is preventing you from standing up for yourself and telling her why she is mistaken, which must be very frustrating. Perhaps if you have someone to cheer you on and to tell everything to it would relieve your feelings. She wounds very difficult.

OP - why do you resent him for supposedly “eating what he wants”? You obviously ate what you wanted over a period of time to get to a size 18, so are you just resentful that he gets to do that now?

I wouldn't worry about it. You have the satisfaction of knowing you're doing it the healthy way and will benefit in the long run.

When I put on 2 or 3 stone when I hit 40, no amount of my good diet or exercise would shift it.

I simply put up with it, while still working out/eating well, until 2024 when I started Orlistat, and it managed to kick start the weight loss for me that absolutely nothing else could.

I'm curious re "he eats what he wants". That's not how weight loss medication works. If I eat too much fat, my God do I know about it.

I can see what she ment it's usually the neck it sort of sags and I think unless you eating better and exercising it goes on twice as fast and severely obese people have an apron of saggy skin which will not be taken off by nhs .unless extreme circumstances. These jags are not a wonder drug .they can attack gallbladder an pancreas. To hell with that x

OP hasn't said anything to suggest he's actually lying. He might be, but all we've heard so far is that MIL keeps praising him for weight loss then asking OP about the gym. It's a huge leap to presume from this that he's making a deliberate inference to his mother. It's all coming from her.

Personally I'm extremely open about WLI usage, but it is actually a 100% legit choice not to share private medical information. There's no duty of disclosure, nor any entitlement to be told. He absolutely needs to push back on MIL constantly talking about weight, for their kids sake if nothing else, but her being off on one isn't him lying.

I’m really surprised to see such harsh advice from you. I usually think you’re one of the most sensible posters on here. But it’s a rotten thing to suggest deliberately telling someone something their own partner has asked to be kept secret, just because OP can’t tell MIL to get stuffed and mind her own business.

I think your feelings are perfectly justified OP and your MIL needs to back off. There are one or two here who have had a really weird vitriolic reaction to your post though! Agree you shouldn’t tell MIL about how your husband has achieved his weight loss that’s his private info

Arghh, this must be annoying. I think the best thing is either to tell MIL, as often as it takes, that you don't appreciate her going on about your weight, or tune her out with an internal 'La La La' whenever she starts. It must be hard sticking to a healthy diet when your partner keeps on bringing in sugary fatty food, but probably not worth the aggro of trying to make him stop.

Thata not how mounjaro works, if he's losing weight then his diet has changed.

You support your husband. You’re unreasonable if you don’t actually, quite a bit more that just unreasonable.

you need to put your MIL in her place. You tell her outright that your weight and what you’re going is none of her business and is rude. She’s to stop asking you as you’ll not be answering her.

id also be curious to know about her weight. Is she as slim as she was in her 20s? If not, I’d be asking her why not. How often is she exercising?

👏👏👏👏

love your attitude OP!

I was working out 3xweek, ate healthy etc and I was still overweight. It was INCREDIBLY hard to make that scales shift. I feel that childbirth completely messed up my hormones. And I was even hungrier after working out. Looking back, I was probably still overeating but the healthy stuff.

So after so much deliberation I decided to try Wegovy. I was so scared to jab myself that it took me 3 weeks to get the pen out of the fridge. I’m on my second 0.25 pen now and loosing weight nicely. I feel better about myself and surprisingly I had really amazing “side effects” such as my endo is much less painful, my joints hurt less. Mind you - I have a clear medical history, nothing hereditary etc. I feel like my brain fog has lifted, I can function without thinking about food. Don’t get me wrong, I do get hungry but not the same.

You are doing the right things and the right way. Your husband is not using Mounjaro the right way- you’re not supposed to eat crap. It usually makes you feel quite sick. He should spend the time on the jab building healthy habits whilst he doesn’t have the food noise.

You see, if my husband stops drinking beer or eating chocolate - he looses weight so fast. Literally we once had to call a GP as he was loosing it too fast We were worried he had cancer. Whereas for me it has always been a struggle.

He needs to either tell her that he's on the jabs, or to stop comparing your weight loss or talking about weight loss full stop

Go vegan and cook from scratch for 28 days. You will both drop a dress size and always be full. You’ll learn new tastes and skills and feel so energised/positive.

Next time MIL starts on you, ask her how often she goes to the memory clinic to check on her obvious dementia.