AIBU to resent my husband’s weight loss and his mum’s comments?

Then get over it. If you don’t like his mums comments tell her, you’re a grown up

but that’s not the issue is it. Or what he eats, as he’s clearly having occasional treats, as otherwise due to thr calorific content he’d be eating very little and barely able to function.

the issue here is you’re jealous and resentful he’s lost weight and you’re a size 18, don’t wish to take the drugs and unable to lose the weight. Thays the real issue.

Nah. His wife is trying to lose weight, and he brings in crap food just because? Why do that. I'd resent him, too.

Refuse to eat the food he tries to sabotage you with, OP. See your mother in law a lot less, and tell your husband you don't want to eat croissants, etc.

I have read the posts thanks

I’m a bit confused. I didn’t think the jabs made you lose weight; I thought they reduced your appetite so you ate less and that was how you lost weight.
Have I misunderstood?

If you read the post it’s obvious it’s not about the jabs or the DH

Ignore his mother that her issue, you keep doing what you're doing and tell her to mind her business and stop commenting on your weight. Don't take it out on your husband its not his fault . If his mother knew the truth she'd probably be less complimentary knowing he hasnt put the same effort in as you.

Honestly, I’d tell dh to tell his mum to stop directly or indirectly commenting on your weight or you’ll have to tell her about the Mounjaro. Make it his problem.

It’s not on at all for you to resent him. The issue is with his mother not him.
MJ is not a “magic bullet” and requires the person to place themselves into calorie deficit too.
i was overweight much of my adult life, and went to the gym, exercised etc. I have pcos and was always a losing battle. I was reffered 12 years ago for weight loss surgery, and at the time I felt like a total failure. But I’ve learnt over the years that it’s a tool for me to to use. I’ve met others along the way who have regained (some not all the weight as at the end of the day we cannot eat as much, but it’s still about the quality of nutrition and calories). If MJ had been around then I would have embraced that. I have been judged for “cheating” by so called friends (not friends anymore I hasten to add - don’t need people in my life who cannot be supportive).

when I was first reffered it was such a relief to hear from the surgeons and dieticians that my medical make up was a huge part of my obesity, which is why a gastric bypass could help, if I was willing to put in the work.
I am 10 years post op. I will never be skinny, but I was a size 24 and manage my weight at between a12-14. I will always be checking what I eat. But I did this for me, my health and being around a long time for my kids.

please don’t resent or poo poo your husbands choice to do something to support his health. It’s. It a magic bullet (nothing is), but we all need a helping hand sometimes. I would urge you to do research on glp1’s and not be judgemental for people who use them (or like me have had surgery). I wish they had been an option for me. The bypass is brilliant but I live with a lot of compromises (lifelong need to take supplements to prevent malabsorption, dumping syndrome etc), but wouldn’t change the journey I’ve been on. I am not sure I would still be alive had it not been for wls.

Ahem he is aware of the fact that if he does not change his eating as soon as he gets off the jab the weight will pile right back on right? I feel for you and I don't think I'd be able to hold my tongue next time my mil has a go:" isn't it unfair you don't seem to lose weight like my darling son is doing so effortlessly?" "Well the jab has been working very well for him but I prefer not to go that route. Also I'm concerned he's not eating healthy and will pile the weight back on when he stops maybe you could do talk to him about it?" 😁🤫

Your MIL sounds really rude but I don't think you should be angry that your DH is losing weight in a different way than you.

It sounds like he has terrible willpower so I think jabs are a smart choice for him. If you are happy and capable to lose weight without medical help, good on you! It's not a competition though.

Yes, yabu to resent your DH for his weight loss, you should be happy for him in that regard. He needs to tell his mother to stop with the comments though.

I was with you till you said tell her he’s on the jabs. No the op should not be sharing private medical information out of spite. Or for any reason at all, what the fuck kind of marriage is that, what next the husband can tell everyone about his wife’s piles and endo?

Perhaps not, but she's a better parent.

I think this is totally understandable. I’m not sure what the solution is. Could he perhaps ask his mum to stop talking about weight?

She used to ask me straight up why I don’t lose weight until I asked her not to talk about my body.
Good on you. Comments about weight should not be made unless requested.
She now asks it in more indirect ways (like how often am I going to the gym).
Does she go to the gym? Ask her why she is so interested.

Your DH weight loss method didn't address why he put the weight on in the first place.

I have no idea how he is eating whatever he wants still. I could eat whatever I wanted but I'd loose no weight and possibly have the shits as well. I thought it just suppressed your hunger and slowed food transit? How does this work? Is he literally eating the same and the jabs are melting his fat?

Or he still eating a varied diet? I had chocolate and KFC on sliming world and lost 3 stone. But I wasn't eating my normal diet or as much junk food overall.

Ie what am i doing wrong as I have to get calories below 1000 a day on adverage for the week to loose weight on injections. My fat is not melting off.

I ended up losing 15st after having a gastric bypass. However, there is no magic wand - Even surgery is just a tool to help you and it's hard work. The same for taking jabs. What I will say - You can't outrun a bad diet. Going to the gym will not make you lose weight, but it will tone you up, turn fat to muscle, help you lose -some- weight. If your diet is still poor, then you're going to remain a size 18. I've been here and still am here. I have another 5 stone to go.

Stop cutting your nose off to spite your face. Take the jabs! But you need to change your eating behaviours while on the jabs because once you stop them...it'll all go back on if those behaviours are still there. Surgery/jabs are tools to help you change your lifestyle. Use them, get the weight off, mentally change your behaviour. Otherwise, no amount of hours at the gym is going to help you.

Stop engaging with your MIL. Silence is the best response. She's toxic. Tell her your husband is taking the jabs and leave it at that. Give hubby an ultimatum, he tells her or you will.

I'll say it again as a diabetic in remission who once hit 30 stone - You cannot outrun a bad diet.

@Velvetandleather he shouldn't be feeding the children in the way that made him and his wife obese. I've seen it across my SM, the parents overfeed their children then get a gastric band. Years later the children are still trying to undo what their parents did to them. Now it's the WLI. Parents like the OP's DH are causing health and eating issues in their children and like addicts passed on their issues, so is he. Drugs to stop addictions isn't the way to go. The whole family could be eating properly and making sure they move enough. The OP's DH is going to get obese again, or be on drugs for the rest of his life. Meanwhile he'll lose muscle and be having other health problems.

YABU and a martyr. You are not morally better than him for "working hard".

The jabs work by reducing your appetite, so it doesn't make sense that he's eating crap, not exercising and still losing weight - unless he's bulimic or something similar.

Op, your own thread title says you’re resentful of his weight loss. But you also explain you don’t wish to use the meds. To not be losing weight you need to be eating to maintenance. No matter how healthy and thay maintenance level will be much higher at a size 18 than it would a 12 or 14.

you are responsible for you. You are not some pathetic little woman posters are making you out to be, who needs their husband to not eat as he wishes and have a word with his mum for you as you can’t do such a thing.

either go on a diet, or go on a diet with the drugs, or accept your weight, and if you don’t like his mothers comments, bloody tell her.

can I ask though, what is your objection to the drugs, why are you doing this to yourself,

What and she’s what some sad little woman who has no personal responsibility. She can tell his mother to fuck off . She can avoid the junk food, she’s a grown ass woman. She doesn’t need him to do it whilst she sits simpering in the corner eating chocolate croissants as it’s his fault he bought them for him and the kids,

Yes but she needs to clarify that, as she’s posting like th4 man is gorging on junk. Her own husband, how fucked uo about weight do you need to be, to be so utterly jealous and resentful of your own husband.