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Original poster

To have gone for after work drinks tonight?

206 replies

tillyougetenough · 26/06/2026 23:37

This week has been horrendous at work. The office has been hot, pressure from management has been insane, we’ve all worked different hours due to the heat and it’s just been incredibly draining.

We all decided to go to the beach for a few drinks tonight. It was well needed and deserved, even if it was just to sit in the shade and the breeze!

I got home around 10, I’ve had three cocktails. Not huge, I’m not wasted, just pleasantly tipsy. My partner is outraged, he thinks I have a drinking problem and has genuinely suggested I go for counselling for my “alcohol issues”.

WIBU to go?

OP posts:
TheyGrewUp · 27/06/2026 09:17

@tillyougetenough can you laugh and ask him what the problem is or to piss off, stop being a knob and get real without fear of repercussions? If not, you need to leave as this will get more and more miserable.

99bottlesofkombucha · 27/06/2026 09:16

I went out with some mum friends and had 4 drinks last night, I’d never get this reaction from my dh. It’s not hot here either 😂

99bottlesofkombucha · 27/06/2026 09:16

Mumdiva99 · 27/06/2026 09:09

I agree. You don't need to scream and shout. But you do need to 'get it out'.
-What exactly is your problem with me going out?
-Why do you think 3 drinks os excessive over an evening?
-What have I ruined - because the only person ruining things here is you.

How long have you been together? How old are you? Do you really want this forever....

Show quote history

This. With some clear ultimatums- I will not be in a relationship where I cannot go out and have a few drinks without all this anger and sulking, it’s very unattractive and makes me think I should go out again tonight for a few drinks, I clearly don’t do it enough since you think you can ban me like a child.

arethereanyleftatall · 27/06/2026 09:14

arethereanyleftatall · 27/06/2026 09:11

Is this relationship making you happy op?

I would prefer to be single. It’s fun and peaceful.

Just to expand on this. I’m single. So in this same scenario I would have gone to the beach, without having to think about or text anyone. I would have come home giggly and happy. I would have come home to no negativity. I would have woken up with no negativity. I would be doing whatever I wanted to today.

Thebinisrightthere · 27/06/2026 09:13

Why is he annoyed at you having a few drinks?

TheGreatDownandOut · 27/06/2026 09:13

NoSausage · 27/06/2026 08:26

I can't believe you think this is about alcohol.

He knows rationally that he's not "allowed" to be angry at you for going out but that's exactly what this is. Probably worried about "other men" but knows he can't say it. So he's saying it's alcohol. He's lying. He's controlling. And he's well on his way to dragging you down.

Absolutely this! He is being controlling but he knows he can’t really come out and say he doesn’t want you going out so he is making it about alcohol.

My ex was like this, would act all fine if I told him I was going out but then pick a fight with me over something stupid. Such as - he rang me at 11pm while I was out with friends but I missed the call - called him back less than ten minutes later and apparently that was my crime.

He is being a total dickhead OP. You absolutely weren’t in the wrong to go, sounds like you needed it and he’s just ruining that for you now.

lordbaddingham · 27/06/2026 09:12

Next time you get asked out for a drink after work you'll remember the grief it caused and think, oh it's not worth it. This is his aim.

Fitbodyproblem · 27/06/2026 09:11

He's controlling. Is this how you want to live your life? How would it be when he has children to bully as well?

Charlize43 · 27/06/2026 09:11

Sounds like you need a new partner, one who enjoys Sangria in the Sunshine or Prosecco in the Park or can appreciate a dry Martini after a hard day in the office... Someone who likes to celebrate life!

Cheers!

arethereanyleftatall · 27/06/2026 09:11

Is this relationship making you happy op?

I would prefer to be single. It’s fun and peaceful.

lordbaddingham · 27/06/2026 09:10

NoSausage · 27/06/2026 08:26

I can't believe you think this is about alcohol.

He knows rationally that he's not "allowed" to be angry at you for going out but that's exactly what this is. Probably worried about "other men" but knows he can't say it. So he's saying it's alcohol. He's lying. He's controlling. And he's well on his way to dragging you down.

This is exactly it in my view too

Mumdiva99 · 27/06/2026 09:09

calflions · 27/06/2026 09:07

You need to have the row, I'm afraid. Have it out this morning properly. Otherwise him being grumpy just leads to you being resentful.

I agree. You don't need to scream and shout. But you do need to 'get it out'.
-What exactly is your problem with me going out?
-Why do you think 3 drinks os excessive over an evening?
-What have I ruined - because the only person ruining things here is you.

How long have you been together? How old are you? Do you really want this forever....

Original poster
tillyougetenough · 27/06/2026 09:09

dapsnotplimsolls · 27/06/2026 09:07

Are you bothered about the football? Why not just go to the BBQ then head home and he can go and watch the football.

I don’t mind watching England, plus the friends have a lovely garden so I’d be happy. But he’s just pissed me off this morning by being such a grumpy twat

OP posts:
SunnySunnyDayz · 27/06/2026 09:09

Are you going to talk to him about this? The facts of the situation are at odds with his reaction so I'd want an explanation..

fishonabicycle · 27/06/2026 09:08

He is being jealous and unreasonable. If he is often like this, it is absolutely not acceptable.

calflions · 27/06/2026 09:07

You need to have the row, I'm afraid. Have it out this morning properly. Otherwise him being grumpy just leads to you being resentful.

HettySunshine · 27/06/2026 09:07

Every now and again (maybe twice a year) I go out with my friends for work for ‘a couple of drinks’ and end up dancing the night away in a club and rolling home in the early hours. My dh never turns a hair, gets up with the kids in the morning, does all the childcare stuff and brings me regular glasses of water and pieces of toast until I’m ready to get up and face the world.

He would never dream of commenting on the amount I had drunk or anything else, other than asking me about my night and whether I had a good time. Your DP behaviour is awful and he doesn’t sound like a nice person.

dapsnotplimsolls · 27/06/2026 09:07

Are you bothered about the football? Why not just go to the BBQ then head home and he can go and watch the football.

IDrinkTeaAllTheTime · 27/06/2026 09:06

tillyougetenough · 27/06/2026 09:04

I meant 8:20, but yes he thinks I’m “hungover and grumpy”, and that it ruins our day. We’re going for a family BBQ and to watch the football in a friend’s garden. Hardly the day of days 🙄 I can’t be bothered for it to be honest

Show quote history

Honestly, I’d tell him to piss off and take yourself out for the day. Maybe a nice cocktail or two by the beach is in order 😉. Pathetic man child that he is.

itsgettingweird · 27/06/2026 09:05

id have laughed at him and said “yeah I can see how that conversation with a therapist goes”

“I’ve had alcohol once this year - it was 3 cocktails on the beach with colleagues and my partner thinks I have an alcohol problem”

“why does he think that?”

Then look at him for an answer - and whilst waiting for an answer that can never come plan my escape from the knob.

Original poster
tillyougetenough · 27/06/2026 09:04

IDrinkTeaAllTheTime · 27/06/2026 09:03

You had a lie in until 08:30 on a Saturday and he’s accusing you of being hungover? He’s really clutching here, isn’t he?

I meant 8:20, but yes he thinks I’m “hungover and grumpy”, and that it ruins our day. We’re going for a family BBQ and to watch the football in a friend’s garden. Hardly the day of days 🙄 I can’t be bothered for it to be honest

OP posts:
EmeraldShamrock000 · 27/06/2026 09:03

tillyougetenough · 27/06/2026 09:01

He’s still very grumpy this morning. I didn’t immediately say good morning as I went downstairs, and slept in a little (8:30 as opposed to 7:45), and he’s accusing me of being hungover and ruining our plans today - I’m not hungover because I wasn’t really drunk, I slept in because the last week has been exhausting. I’m a bit fed up of it.

Tell him you’re angry not hungover, you slept in because you didn’t want to look at the sulking sod who is still moaning.

IDrinkTeaAllTheTime · 27/06/2026 09:03

You had a lie in until 08:30 on a Saturday and he’s accusing you of being hungover? He’s really clutching here, isn’t he?

EmeraldShamrock000 · 27/06/2026 09:02

That’s sounds like relaxing fun after a hard week. You must have nice work colleagues.
Your partner is a jealous controlling person. You are your own boss. He’s using his jealous nature as a stick to beat you with. Tell him to get stuffed.
I can’t stand men like that .

Original poster
tillyougetenough · 27/06/2026 09:01

He’s still very grumpy this morning. I didn’t immediately say good morning as I went downstairs, and slept in a little (8:30 as opposed to 7:45), and he’s accusing me of being hungover and ruining our plans today - I’m not hungover because I wasn’t really drunk, I slept in because the last week has been exhausting. I’m a bit fed up of it.

OP posts:
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