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Original poster

To have gone for after work drinks tonight?

206 replies

tillyougetenough · 26/06/2026 23:37

This week has been horrendous at work. The office has been hot, pressure from management has been insane, we’ve all worked different hours due to the heat and it’s just been incredibly draining.

We all decided to go to the beach for a few drinks tonight. It was well needed and deserved, even if it was just to sit in the shade and the breeze!

I got home around 10, I’ve had three cocktails. Not huge, I’m not wasted, just pleasantly tipsy. My partner is outraged, he thinks I have a drinking problem and has genuinely suggested I go for counselling for my “alcohol issues”.

WIBU to go?

OP posts:
HopeIsAScaryThing · 27/06/2026 11:04

tillyougetenough · 27/06/2026 10:50

Together 2.5 years. We don’t live together but alternate between places. We both sometimes like our own space but see each other regularly. It’s not like it’s a LDR where it was our only weekend together.

Show quote history

I would not move the relationship forward (living together, engagement, etc) unless he addresses his issue. And this is his issue. Don't let him make it yours or drag you down. I would strongly urge counselling if you don't know what's driving this controlling behaviour re alcohol ... all right for him but not you apparently and he was grilling you about it immediately! Just, no.

BringBackCatsEyes · 27/06/2026 11:03

Only read OP's posts. It seems like he's trying to find a way to end the relationship, and that he can use your drinking habits to blame it on you.

There is nothing wrong with enjoying a few alcoholic drinks.

hallomynameisinigomontoya · 27/06/2026 11:01

Tell him you'll stop drinking if he stops watching football.

amber763 · 27/06/2026 11:01

Honestly tell him to fuck right off. Controlling twat.

HopeIsAScaryThing · 27/06/2026 11:01

You need to stand up for yourself and tell him he's completely out of order for being mad at you for having a night out with your workmates, you're a grown up, you are responsible, and you are entitled to have a few drinks. Just like he does. His suggestions that you have a problem are actually offensive and concerning and he needs to apologise and/or take himself off to counselling if he can't see that.

TutTutTutSigh · 27/06/2026 10:59

Bloody hell what a miserable shite he is. As someone who's also worked all week in the heatwave me and DP said sod it on Thursday and went to a pub for tea and had 2 whole pints each! Call AA! He also brought a couple of bottles of cider home yesterday which we drank in the garden. Call the police!

We rarely drink in the week so Thursday did feel like we were bunking off school 😅

Cherrysoup · 27/06/2026 10:58

Genuinely sounds like the start of some controlling behaviour. Are you at your place? I’d suggest you stay at your own place tonight. He’s ruining the weekend for absolutely zero reason.

dapsnotplimsolls · 27/06/2026 10:57

Thank god you have your own place.

Soreenmaltloaf23 · 27/06/2026 10:57

Honestly it comes across as weird and controlling. I'd hate to feel I couldn't enjoy a wind down after a busy week. Or sleep in if I wanted to. He's jealous. I hope you're making him drive today so he can't drink! I would also be quite clear he can't dictate my choices.

dapsnotplimsolls · 27/06/2026 10:56

Have one drink at the BBQ and make it very obvious. None = he wins, 2+ = confirms you're an alcoholic in his pea-brain.

Willyoujust · 27/06/2026 10:54

He sounds like a complete mood hoover!!!

GreatPlumBiscuit · 27/06/2026 10:54

tillyougetenough · 27/06/2026 10:48

I’d get it if I drank a lot and relied on it. But I don’t. This is the first time this year I’ve had a drink

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Jesus, he's being absolutely ridiculous.

OP do you live together?

Does he try to control other areas of your life?

I'm sorry you've found yourself a controlling insecure idiot.

Please throw him back.

Just imagine, you could have a partner who encourages you to let of some steam after a horrible hard week at work with a few drinks AND brings you a bacon sandwich in bed.

Createausername1970 · 27/06/2026 10:53

tillyougetenough · 27/06/2026 10:50

Together 2.5 years. We don’t live together but alternate between places. We both sometimes like our own space but see each other regularly. It’s not like it’s a LDR where it was our only weekend together.

Show quote history

That's good, you can give him lots of space for the foreseeable future.

MustardBear · 27/06/2026 10:52

He sounds like hard work @tillyougetenough
I’d be thinking long and hard about this one.

Slightyamusedandsilly · 27/06/2026 10:51

That's good. I think you need to stand firm on this. You'll have a drink if you want to. You're an adult and make your own choices. And if he doesn't like it, he can stay away.

IDrinkTeaAllTheTime · 27/06/2026 10:51

tillyougetenough · 27/06/2026 10:48

I’d get it if I drank a lot and relied on it. But I don’t. This is the first time this year I’ve had a drink

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Exactly. He would have a point if you were an alcoholic or problematic drinker, but that’s clearly not the case. Saying “I need a drink” is just a turn of phrase, much the same as people saying “I’m starving” when they’re a bit peckish.

My ex was quite controlling around the things I said and it honestly becomes unbearable because you start policing your own words and thinking about every little thing you say before you say it in case it’s wrong. It’s no way to live.

Original poster
tillyougetenough · 27/06/2026 10:50

Slightyamusedandsilly · 27/06/2026 10:47

How long have you been together, and whose home is it?

It's not a normal response to having a drink after work at all. And he's a hypocrite because he likes a drink himself.

Together 2.5 years. We don’t live together but alternate between places. We both sometimes like our own space but see each other regularly. It’s not like it’s a LDR where it was our only weekend together.

OP posts:
Itsallsostressful · 27/06/2026 10:49

Firstly OP he is behaving like a total bellend 😡 and doing his best to suck your joy and be a fun sponge. This is in the hope you'll decide it's not worth the bother to occasionally go out and enjoy yourself.

Also 8.20/8.30 is by no means a long lie for a Saturday to be blamed on a hangover !!!!!

Also a few evening cocktails on the beach just sounds like absolute heaven !! 😍

Original poster
tillyougetenough · 27/06/2026 10:48

Createausername1970 · 27/06/2026 10:38

Hmm. I am still definitely team OP, he is being a twonk, but I suppose he might have been concerned about the way you phrased it.

If this is the case, then it's good he is concerned - but the way he has gone about it, even with the best of intentions, is ridiculous.

Show quote history

I’d get it if I drank a lot and relied on it. But I don’t. This is the first time this year I’ve had a drink

OP posts:
Slightyamusedandsilly · 27/06/2026 10:47

How long have you been together, and whose home is it?

It's not a normal response to having a drink after work at all. And he's a hypocrite because he likes a drink himself.

IDrinkTeaAllTheTime · 27/06/2026 10:47

tillyougetenough · 27/06/2026 10:12

We’ve had a conversation and he’s skulked off, saying that I’m just “not seeing the issue”

Does he care to explain what the actual issue is (apart from him)? Because none of us can see it either. He sounds like an oddball.

PussyGaylore · 27/06/2026 10:43

Is you having a drink and going out triggering for him? It may be there is someone with an alcohol problem in his past?

LivingDeadGirlUK · 27/06/2026 10:40

Andepeda · 27/06/2026 10:23

Are you absolutely sure he isn't just unhappy that you were out, enjoying yourself, without him?

the more you say OP the more I think its this. Time to throw this one back.

whosaysIam · 27/06/2026 10:39

Createausername1970 · 27/06/2026 10:38

Hmm. I am still definitely team OP, he is being a twonk, but I suppose he might have been concerned about the way you phrased it.

If this is the case, then it's good he is concerned - but the way he has gone about it, even with the best of intentions, is ridiculous.

Show quote history

His follow up behaviour does not indicate concern for OP. In any way. Classic abusive behaviour

Onmytod24 · 27/06/2026 10:39

So that’s just you and him and he expects you to get up at 8 o’clock on Saturday? that is ridiculous

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