To have gone for after work drinks tonight?

Oh for Vod-s sake. OP had 3 cocktails after a shit week at work. Even if she has done it before,it doesnt mean she has a problem as you imply. It is normal behaviour. Her husband is a sanctimonius prick who begrudged her fun evening out. Insulting to suggest she gets help. Am assuming she doesnt do it every day .

This is really good news OP, you can get out of there now he has shown his controlling ways.

Getting home around 10 is perfectly acceptable, I think you need to confront the idea you have a drinking problem, it sound like a mixture of jealousy and whining.

well the Op says he likes to go out for a beer so I am guessing he only has an issue when ther OP is drinking it against his wishes

Exactly right.

"You're right, I can't see the issue and I have no interest in discussing it."

If you aren't going to dump him, at least cold shoulder him until he grovels, and then grovels more. Then repeat your behaviour to make a point.

Does he have a problem with alcohol ?

I understood your comment and mumsnet is great to get a range of views. @Createausername1970 was not excusing this controlling spoil sport just offering one possible perspective.

I bet them three cocktails were lovely 😋 followed by a moment of clarity. You really don’t need this shit OP X

If that comment is directed at me - I am not making excuses. I merely said if he had genuine concerns he wasn't wrong to want to raise them, but what he actually said and how he said it was totally inappropriate.

Can't believe people on here have no comprehension skills.

Thank goodness you don’t live together. Time to get rid of him. He’s not nice at all. You deserve a LOT better. Have a nice day at home. Alone. 💐

You need to ask him to explain.

You don't see the issue. 1000 people on here dont see the issue. So unless he uses his big boy words and explains what the issue is, then there really is no issue other than him having a man mood and behaving like a controlling prick.

Just say to him "you're right. I cannot see the issue, so if you have an issue with me having a couple of drinks after a crazy week at work then you will need to explain as I have no idea why you're in such a mood! I wasnt drunk, nor am I hungover, and I slept in 45 minutes longer as I'm tired from work!"

He sounds like a controlling idiot, ltb asap

Wtf have I just read? Your partner is massively unreasonable and controlling - who the hell does he think he is??? You're a grown adult, you can drink what you like, you don't need his permission. And this is one of less than a handful times you've even touched any alcohol all year and he accuses you of having a drinking problem. HE IS THE PROBLEM. You have done nothing wrong whatsoever - 3 cocktails in one evening is a totally reasonable amount, especially after a hard week. And you say he often goes out for pints with his mates?! The fucking cheek of him! One rule for him but another rule for you? I tell you what, if my partner said to me what yours has said to you I'd fucking tear him a new one. Absolutely outrageous. Tell him to mind his own sodding business.

He couldn't stand that you had fun, that didn't involve him. If he wants a companion animal, get him a pet. TV coverage of the match kicks off at 20.45, or 6pm (sky sports but it's the same recycled stuff) a brief lie in hasn't made a difference. I wouldn't put up with this, whatever decade of your life you are in, don't waste it on someone who doesn't recognise your autonomy and who sulks.

Is he controlling in other areas of your life?

Trying to control you

dump

What excuses? I've read the whole thread and not seen a single post that didn't call this guy a controlling arse who needs dumping, apart from one or two early ones before OP clarified that she didn't often drink.

OP we have your back 💪

You had a tough week and you and your coworkers got together for drinks. You had 3 over the evening, you weren't driving, I see zero problem here. And I say that as someone who doesn't drink alcohol.

Your partner is being very controlling here. Outraged when he himself drinks is applying double standards to your behaviour and his. He's massively overreacting to a nothing.

Have there been other instances of him being controlling such as not wanting you to go out or meet up with friends?

What you did sounds idyllic and lovely, OP, and just what you and your colleagues needed after a pressured week. I think DP is jealous!

I think your husband is trying to manipulate you. I would assume it’s just another way to control you.

Whose family is the BBQ at @tillyougetenough ?

His - really up to you, but I suspect he'll either drink water all night to prove his "point" and be a misery guts or get bladdered. Really up to you if you can tolerate being in the same room/garden with him tonight. 🙄

Yours - go on your own and enjoy the time with your family, and have a few drinks!!🍸🥂🍺🍻🍷 🥳😁

He's being very judgy if he goes out and drinks enough to get "merry" sometimes but wants you to be sober. You're not a nun ☕

You don’t live together, it would be incredibly to just call this off and move on with your life.

I think there is a place for analysing relationships and he said/she said but no kids and no shared home? Meh. Move on.

It doesn't sound like you have a drink problem but you do have a controlling boyfriend problem.

What a misery he is.

My DH's team organizes Happy Hours every few weeks and I encourage him to go. If I'm able to drop him off in the morning, I do, or he leaves his car at work and takes an Uber home. I'm self-employed so I don't have them, but I'd go if I did. Nothing wrong with relaxing with a couple of drinks after a tough week.

Spoil his weekend a bit more, break up with him.