These recent cases of a husband drugging their wife so other men can rape her are new level horrific to me.
We have always known that the vast majority of violence and sexual violence against women and girls happens at home by men. Normally, someone they know who often has some level of control and the women have, at some stage, thought they could trust.
We all know the rules of being female.
Women always take extra precautions from men every single time they leave the house, whether that is changing a walking route, getting a cab rather than walking or holding keys between our fingers. We know the rules of being female.
Women know not to leave their drink unattended or ask for Angela at the bar.
We know that sometimes when a partner is showing escalating controlling signs and is violent towards us at home, that it is better to not challenge this behaviour and plan the escape when he’s not around to avoid an increased risk of murder.
Women know that if a man follows us and is heckling at us, not to say anything because the man may become violent. Or as I taught my daughters go into the nearest shop and ask for help.
There are more examples of how we, as women, know the rules to attempt to protect ourselves from male violence.
Should we add another rule to being female?
If we feel sleepy, groggy unexpectedly or if we are having unexplained gyno medical issues should the rule be set up a camera to check our husband hasn’t been drugging us and getting random men in to rape us unconscious?
I mean what is wrong with men as a sex class.