AIBU for refusing to reschedule my interview again for my mum?

Put yourself first, op. At least this time. It's utterly unreasonable to ask you to reschedule again. You probably wouldn't get the job as you'd appear really flaky. Mum will manage.

If I had an applicant who rescheduled twice I would assume they weren't really interested in the role and remove them from the list.

If you reschedule again you might as well not bother you won’t get the job as you look problematic.

Agree with others that I wouldn’t have rescheduled for first appt unless there was more to it than your adult child wanting you there. I suppose it depends how you explained the need to be there for the first appt but I’d imagine that would already be going against you.

Absolutely don't reschedule....bringing all your family / life baggage to the job before you've even interviewed is not a good look.

Spot on. My DM has said me and DH should give up our jobs and move DC from schools to be closer to her so she doesn't have to move because she wants more help.

Ffs some mothers are so selfish. Mine (elderly) almost cried when my family and I suggested we organise her a private taxi account (after 7 years of caring for Ddad and her eyesight then started ailing and she could no longer drive). Could be independent when she wanted to be, and we have an abundance of excellent public transport where we live. Don't feel guilty OP-she's being extremely entitled and dismissive of what is important to you. Had it been an appointment for a cancer treatment similar I would have maybe knicked the interview on the head. Anything less, no-your brother can pick up. Good luck with the interview 🍀

I agree! I have a hard time imagining any employer would want someone who seems so unreliable when they haven't even got the job yet. If you reschedule twice, you can kiss this job goodbye.

If you reschedule a second time, you absolutely will not get the job.
If it's so important to your mum that you take her she will have to reschedule her appointment.
Daughter is ALWAYS above parents.

Your mum is being very unreasonable as she can go with someone else. Changing an interview twice would look bad and could very likely cost you the job. If I was interviewing and someone changed twice I would think they would be difficult as an employee with flexibility. Also makes you look like you are not that interested. If mum can't get someone else the ask her to reschedule. Good luck with the interview.

Yeah but depending on OP’s age, it might not be clear she was talking about an adult child. I doubt she said “can we reschedule, I need to take my adult child to a medical appointment”, because that’s a weird thing to say. She probably said “I need to take my son/daughter to a medical appointment”.

I wouldnt bother going to the reschedualed interview that you cancelled to take an ADULT child to a Drs appointment. The way the jobs market is at the moment im sure there will be people interviewing without the baggage, I CHILD yes but ADULT not unless it was an emergency.

I don't think this helps for future situations. Its best to be upfront about boundaries and what we are and are not willing to tolerate.

Also, I would not be willing to lie in this situation. I'd rather tell the truth and keep my integrity than molly coddle a grown adult who should behave better.

You’ll never get the job if you reschedule again so either go as scheduled or cancel.

Your mum
needs to understand that you don’t have unlimited time and need to be strategic about when you help her. She needs to either be independent or rely on someone else

I dont think you should have rescheduled for the first time so definitely not unreasonable to say no to a second.

Your mum is being selfish and in my opinion totally out of order to try and manipulate you this way. If this is her usual behaviour it might be time to look at how you manage the relationship.

If you reschedule again you might as well cancel the interview because you won't be getting the job.
No employer is going to put up with this level of flakiness. (You aren't being flaky but it will look like this). I wouldn't employ you if did this because I'd assume a) that you weren't really interested in the job and b) you'd be constantly wanting time off to take relatives to medical appointments.

Tell your mum no and that's the end of it.

They will think you are an unreliable flake if you reschedule again.

Just tell your mum you tried to change the interview date and was refused.

YMIBU
What sort of emotional blackmail is this

rescheduling once is mostly acceptable, rescheduling twice will be seen as flakey

Interesting about elderly parents believing their needs trump others - I've had a couple of elderly relatives who've gone entirely the other way and refuse to tell you even when they've been lying on the floor for hours.

Anyway OP no of course you're not being unreasonable. Interested about the brother thing - does she default to you rather than him? I would nip that in the bud - work with him to make sure you share the load evenly, do not put up with her nonsense.

Of course you can’t reschedule again! Your mum is being very selfish!

If I was the employer, I would see this as you being unreliable and I certainly wouldn’t give you the job

Good grief. My auntie is 97, lives alone and gets herself to her own appointments. Your mother is being far too dependent, given that this isn't an appointment for something serious.

And yes, I'm occasionally involved in recruitment, and I'd not be at all impressed by a further postponement. It's difficult getting the interviewing team together when each has a busy calendar, and it also means that other interviewees are inconvenienced by having to wait longer to hear whether it not they've been successful.

Gosh no- she needs another option- even a booked taxi. Or to ring and ask to move her appointment- this is often an option and often only pushes it back a week or so.

It was risky to reschedule the interview once! Twice would give us serious worries about whether someone could be at work as needed if we offered.

YANBU. Rescheduling a second time would give a terrible impression. Once could be accepted as unfortunate, twice would have a potential employer thinking you're too distracted by caring responsibilities to focus on their business.

It's not a matter of caring for the child more than your mum. If I'd already rescheduled once for my child's medical appointment then I'd do everything I could to avoid doing so a second time, even for the same person.