To have not backed down on this shit of a man on the train?

I'd tap his shoulder to "wake" him and TELL him to move off your seat!

Me too.

We paid for our ticket too.

Women, don't be wimps! The more you do not assert your god-given right to make a stand, the more they will take over.

On a busy commuter train, I once asked a man if he could keep to his own side.
Apparently this was really difficult because although he moved, he only managed a few minutes before he was yet again manspreading well into my space and he then sort of angled himself more towards me.

So I asked him to sit straighter so he wasn't in my space.
He then went all indignant and huffy about it without actually making much effort to move.

At which point I said much louder, so half the carriage could hear: "You are so far over the middle and there is literally no reason why your leg should be touching mine at all."

He did move, although there was exaggerated sighing from him for the rest of the journey but his leg did not touch mine again.

YANBU

Dirty shoes on seats. Rank.
He wouldn’t have spoken to a man like that.

I generally do this... but a side effect is sometimes that the other person leans their elbow on it but allows to go way beyond their side and into mine.

Not once the trains are full. No bag needs a seat more than a person

You are pretty selfish not to wonder why people are doing it.

Besides which people with bags DO need more room than those travelling without. Sit next to a bagless bloke next time.

I travel by train to work most days. One day on a packed train the entire carriage had had to endure a very loud man having a phone call about selling pipes. Except he kept saying fucking pipes over and over again. As I got up to get off I said at him in the poshest voice I could manage “no one cares how many fucking pipes you sell, shut the fuck up” I actually got a round of applause from other commuters as I stepped off the train.

Well done, this is definitely me too! Even more so if I’ve woken up in a bad mood!!!

Good for you OP!!

I always try to put the middle arm rest down as this demarcates the space we each have 😁

I always ask for a seat from people who think their bags need one, as I figure some people won't have the confidence to do so.

It's really selfish behaviour

Yanbu.

Completely right to tell him off, good on you. Not once but twice (and 2 different people) my dh has sat next to someone on a train who has sat there taken off their shoes and then their socks and put their socks on the table and then got out their toenail clippers and cut their toe nails on a train on the hour long journey into London. I honestly wish I was joking but some human beings are vile!

You were completely in your right to tell him off.

I put my bag on the seat these days if the train is half full because otherwise I'm without fail first port of call for weirdy blokes who get a kick out of shit behaviour.

Recently a bloke got on my half empty train and told me to move my bag so he could sit next to me (there was a seat directly opposite free alongside many others... But all next to men). I stood up and said "you take the window, I'll take the aisle". He stood there for a second, said "what??", I said "go on, I insist!". He refused (no!) and hissed NEVER FUCKING MIND then stomped away and stood for the rest of the journey in the vestibule. Did I mention his total journey only took about seven minutes because he got on at the second last stop? He just wanted to throw his teeny tiny weight around and thought I was an easy target.

So these days if you see a woman with her bag out this sort of thing is why.

(I will move it if the train is starting to fill up but I'm sick of being the freak's easy target)

Well done for speaking up. You were not unreasonable.

i rarely use trains, but did recently and was very shocked by the amount of people with bags on seats and the amount of people willing to huddle in the gaps rather than asking someone to move.

i just thought I’m not standing when there’s loads of seats and asked people to move them.

only one negative experience, a middle aged woman with laptop out and bags, didn’t make any effort to move despite the amount of people piling on, I asked, she pulled a face, took ages and made a huge fuss, asked me to go in the window bit (not a problem) then fidgeted for ages, stands up and says, I’ll have to go to first class I can’t stand this…

uppity cow, bloody book first class single seat then… I’m not standing when your bag hasn’t bought a ticket!

Good for you OP! My MIL makes a beeline for anyone with a bag on the seat next to them, or anyone spreading out, and will call them out if there’s resistance. Sounds like he’s not used to being challenged - you never know, maybe he will think twice now

It would be much better if people were friendly and chasing.
Life's much easier when your nice.

Completely agree. And call me old fashioned I don’t care: I absolutely cannot stand looking at a man sitting on a train whilst a woman has to stand, or in some cases sitting on the floor. I would be absolutely ashamed if that were my husband or sons. They will always stand for a woman or someone older than them. Yes I know “equality” and all that but there you are

Thank heavens the ‘be kind’ aka conflict averse culture is waning and people are pulling others up on their selfishness. YDANBU

Good for you!! I’m proud of you OP even though I don’t know you. Nothing more I hate than scumbags who go around spitting, swearing and making a twat of themselves.

My friend knits on the train. Would be useful for jabbing intruding arses.

Yanbu OP. Also, public transport is absolute hell on earth in this heat.

And this is why I travel 1st class long distance!!! Had way too many incidents when sitting next to people so now pay a fortune for my own individual seat but so much less stress

I'd tap his shoulder to "wake" him and TELL him to move off your seat!