AIBU to tell my friend her partner sent me an explicit photo

Certain men do this to wreck friendships to distance their partners from their friends.
Some do it because they get off on the reactions (shocked, sickened etc)
Some genuinely think a photo of their knobs make women weak at the knees 🙄

Yes, you do. He put you in this position. Definitely tell her, be aware that the messenger nearly always gets shot so this will probably damage the friendship although you are the innocent.
It’s a horrible position to be in.
My friend got one from her husband’s friend, she didn’t tell her DH. He would have killed his friend, disgusting.

Tread very carefully, OP. If you’re going to tell your friend I would start by saying you were in two minds over what to do with regard telling her but felt it was better she know than not, Go with the mistake option, that way both of you can come together against him and the (imaginary) woman he meant to send it to.

Your friend is going to feel embarrassed and stupid, even though the shame is not hers to own. If people aren’t ready to deal with things, they will bury their heads and withdraw from the people who know the truth. In this case, that is you. Hope you find a path through, and keep the friendship.

I would tell her and show her. Hopefully she will have the sense to end it.

Arent unsolicited dick pick illegal now? You could just report it to the police?

Whoops didnt read the whole thread (facepalm).

vile man, def tell your friend OP. We’ve had similar in our friendship group and we don’t have anything to do with them now. Unfortunately she believes his excuses. More fool her … I’m sure she’s not happy.

And not that it’s relevant … I have mobile numbers for most of our male friends and we sometimes message … same with DH and our female friends … nothing odd about that.

Yes you need to tell her.

He will likely try and say it was a mistake. It wasn't.

Point out two main things.

• You will support her no matter what.
• He committed a crime. You haven't decided yet if you will report this.

You mention you have a DD and that they have a child too I think? That adds another grim element to it I think as like you I'd be worried my child saw it on my phone. Which I'd also be pointing out.

I hope she views this as the straw that broke the camels back. Either way she is lucky to have a supportive friend.

I would report. This happened to me years ago and the photo flashed up on my lock screen at 8am when I was getting my kids ready for school and they saw it on the side. I went nuts as you can imagine. I’m absolutely sick of being forced to see men’s penises without consent and the only way to address it now is by reporting to the police. We’ve been telling men since mobile phones and email were invented we don’t want it!!!

I would think many would see through that as fake.

Be honest with your friend why try and protect him with a reply maybe this was sent to me by mistake so he has a get out he has flashed at you that is what it is

if your friend wants to make herself believe it was a mistake and this is what he will say then she is only fooling herself but she will know it isn’t

these men make me sick it’s vile behaviour of creeps

Love this.

You should report to the police too. He's committed a crime.

No it’s not. It’s a criminal offence to send these pictures and forwarding it to her friend would be illegal.

I wouldn't respond to him. He will spin this as OP making a move on him, jealous, not getting it. All the usual bs. I'd be in the he sent this in error camp!

And ?

Send this as a reply, shit him up a bit …
“AUTOREPLY: We have detected the transmission of unsolicited pornographic images of a potentially illegal nature [code:36489-a] and your device's IP address has been forwarded to the police pending an investigation. If you think this is a mistake, reply STOP”

All the people saying “I’d forward it”, are you mad?

You are then sending explicit images.

Yeah, you’re right. It wasn’t a mistake. He drank too much watching the England game and is trying his luck.

In any case when you tell your friend that will put an end to it.

None of my friend's husband's are on messaging terms with me either. None are Facebook friends and I doubt that any of them are on TikTok. I don't have TikTok or Instagram anyway.

You can't forward it because then you become as guilty as them in terms of sharing sexual images.

The police came and viewed my phone at home because even sending it to them would constitute sharing it.

I had a local man who had sent me a couple random dms about a Facebook group post back in 2020, suddenly send me a dick pic a couple of months ago.

I reported it, as I had his full name and partial address (lived near my former inlaws) and the police came to see me to tell me my options.

I told them I was happy with a Community Resolution Order so they went and told him, in no uncertain terms, the error of his perverse ways, and made it clear he accepts the order or goes to court. He accepted it. The police came back and told me he was a gibbering wreck. Good.

It is now recorded, but no criminal record. It does show on an enhanced DBS check though.

We don't have to take this shit.

Good luck OP.

So it’s all fine and dandy if the message was meant for someone else then ?

If she puts WTF he will back pedal bc he’d read that OP was not into him and likely to tell his partner. I’d she’s neutral then she leaves it to him to explain or dig a hole

I'd forward it to her and say your husband's accidentally sent me this guessing it's for you tell him to be more careful and loads of puking emojis

This is good advice and cuts out the bullshit. It will be clear what his intentions were and are. Unless he frames it that he sent it accidentally and then you were coming onto him - ppl like him are capable of all sorts of twisted rubbish. Probably still worth sending that to him anyway as it would show he was faithless regardless, so you can show your friend the kind of man he is either way