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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Friend invited her friends to my birthday meal

232 replies

Donotfitin · 23/06/2026 18:30

For context I haven’t celebrated my birthday in many years (and have never celebrated my birthday with these friends). Anyway, so one of my friends messages me today and says her friends are visiting and if they can come. I said it was fine, but I’m not necessarily happy about it. So AIBU for thinking she shouldn’t have asked? (She was very aware I haven’t celebrated my birthday in 10+ years).

OP posts:
ChickenBananaBanana · 23/06/2026 18:37

Don't say yes then?!?!

GilesTurnbull · 23/06/2026 18:35

She asked, because it’s reasonable to give you the option to say yes or no. You gave the wrong answer.

StarPyjamas · 23/06/2026 18:35

So your thread title isn't true?

She didn't invite her friends, she asked you if you'd mind her inviting them?

Original poster
Donotfitin · 23/06/2026 18:34

Moonnstarz · 23/06/2026 18:33

Why did you say it was fine?!
If the friends are visiting and are travelling to see her maybe she felt rude abandoning them or cancelling on you.

I don’t have that many friends I don’t want to end up with any for being “difficult “ . Although she know I don’t like most people

OP posts:
Original poster
Donotfitin · 23/06/2026 18:33

Bemyclementine · 23/06/2026 18:32

She shouldnt have asked, but equally you shouldnt have said its fine!

Well I didn’t want to make it awkward!! I don’t think the onus should be on me really.

OP posts:
Moonnstarz · 23/06/2026 18:33

Why did you say it was fine?!
If the friends are visiting and are travelling to see her maybe she felt rude abandoning them or cancelling on you.

Bemyclementine · 23/06/2026 18:32

She shouldnt have asked, but equally you shouldnt have said its fine!