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AIBU?

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Original poster

To cancel date over his ‘joke’?

838 replies

Datingwoee · 23/06/2026 15:52

5th date tomorrow night with a man who has been great up to now. I’ve had to push the time back by an hour - said I’ll need extra time to freshen up after work. His reply to me was: “No worries, can’t be having a whiffy growler lol”.

Is that date cancelling worthy or am I being a bit too harsh?

OP posts:
ImImmortalNowBabyDoll · 23/06/2026 17:29

I just shared this with my husband for a man's perspective and he said unequivocally YANBU and was horrified someone would say that to a date. 😂

purplecorkheart · 23/06/2026 17:29

Cancel. It is an awful comment from anyone but even more so from someone you have not known long. This is him at his best. God knows what he would be like in a couple of years.

Mumtobabyhavoc · 23/06/2026 17:28

PenelopeJoanSterling · 23/06/2026 17:20

not saying its right comment, whats he like in all other aspects ?

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Hairy back and toe fungus.

Catsandbooksaremybag · 23/06/2026 17:28

Everything would clamp shut for me. Ew.

FatParrot · 23/06/2026 17:24

Harrumphhhh · 23/06/2026 16:22

Ugh. No. Cancel.

Have you come across the Burned Haystack method? There’s a Facebook group. It’ll help you feel better about blocking men early in relationships. They don’t improve.

Absolutely this. There’s also a book and an Insta page where you can watch her explain which rhetorical flags to watch for.

Ooohletsgo · 23/06/2026 17:23

It’s not really funny but it’s not offensive either.

I think you’re being a bit dramatic.

Macmin · 23/06/2026 17:22

Red Flag. Gross. Cancel.

Acuppaisbetterthanprosecco · 23/06/2026 17:21

I would make reference to it, such as 'I think you've given me the ick with that comment'

AlwaysExtraHot · 23/06/2026 17:21

DreamingOfGeneHunt · 23/06/2026 15:55

If it was someone I knew quite well I would find it funny, but not someone I've only seen five times.

DP and I have been together twenty-odd years and I can't imagine him thinking that was OK to say.

PenelopeJoanSterling · 23/06/2026 17:20

Datingwoee · 23/06/2026 17:19

Yes it is the first

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not saying its right comment, whats he like in all other aspects ?

Original poster
Datingwoee · 23/06/2026 17:19

Chritrup · 23/06/2026 17:18

Is this the first comment like this he’s made? Seems a bit random.

But no, you wouldn’t be unreasonable. Vile.

Yes it is the first

OP posts:
Magsbd · 23/06/2026 17:19

He’s got no class whatsoever.

Chritrup · 23/06/2026 17:18

Is this the first comment like this he’s made? Seems a bit random.

But no, you wouldn’t be unreasonable. Vile.

Overtheatlantic · 23/06/2026 17:18

Is “growler” slang for vagina?

blueshoes · 23/06/2026 17:18

Charlize43 · 23/06/2026 17:14

Whiffy growler = Smelly dog?

What conversational charm!

Bah! Sit in your garden with a large jug of Margaritas and enjoy the evening, al fresco and al solo.

I had to ask ChatGPT what is a whiffy growler. It is not dog.

Vroomfondleswaistcoat · 23/06/2026 17:17

It does sound a bit like now he's had sex he's going to make absolutely every single remark sexual. He's got a bit over excited and thinks sex is going to be on offer at every date.

Revolting little man.

342524u · 23/06/2026 17:17

Depends on your sense of humour 😂
If you don't have compatible humour, that might be a problem!

LondonLass2026 · 23/06/2026 17:17

Nah fuck that. Sounds like the immature idiots I met after my divorce, who literally only wanted sex.

And that's all this guy wants. He's shown you. Sorry op. This was never going to be a nice date. He was after a shag.

**just seen the drip feed that you've already had sex. Well in that case he wants to keep shagging.

Crudd99 · 23/06/2026 17:16

Sounds like the type of man who makes the ' fish' jokes too. Dump him.

Mumtobabyhavoc · 23/06/2026 17:16

I think you've had a glimpse of who he is.
You can't change him. You now know how he views women. You either think it was okay and are prepared for more of the same, or you're not. If you continue, his friends are likely all similar and he's likely much worse than the comment.

Unforgettablefire · 23/06/2026 17:16

Urgh yuck. Like a pp I wouldn’t mind if it was a friend saying it but a potential partner? Off you fuck.

PenelopeJoanSterling · 23/06/2026 17:15

Ladybyrd · 23/06/2026 17:15

Sounds like an online dater. They start off so well in their profiles but this type of guy invariably cocks it up talking about his penis and blow jobs in the last line. He wouldn’t be for me.

well he already shagged the op

HeBeaverandSheBeaver · 23/06/2026 17:15

He would be a burn on the haystack for me too. Now he has got want he wanted he can be himself. Believe him he is showing you who he is.

Ladybyrd · 23/06/2026 17:15

Sounds like an online dater. They start off so well in their profiles but this type of guy invariably cocks it up talking about his penis and blow jobs in the last line. He wouldn’t be for me.

PenelopeJoanSterling · 23/06/2026 17:15

JHound · 23/06/2026 17:12

This. I am just baffled at somebody thinking that was an appropriate thing to say to somebody you are in the early stages of dating.

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but with the added context of having already done the dance with no pants it adds context