To cancel date over his ‘joke’?

Well, he’s not wrong, I wouldn’t go anywhere near whiffy genitals? But surely, that’s a given? It is an utterly inappropriate thing to say to someone you barely know, I too would get the ick. And ditch. It’s….too much too soon.

it could be said the op had a hungry beaver

I communicate well, so would say that I didn't appreciate his use of growler, but I wouldn't use the term, freshening up, because it does indicate you are washing your bits, which is crass to start with.

Grim. You deserve better.

This totally and utterly gross 🤮

Ugh, he’s shown you his true colours. Bin

Eww, deffo date-cancelling worthy.

Clearly meant as a joke. But anyone who makes that kind of ‘joke’ would be a no from me. I’m all for humour, even dark humour. But puerile humour that isn’t even funny ain’t cool. Makes him look like a twerp.

But, having said that, if he’s generally good company, you enjoy hanging out with him, you fancy him and the sex was good, I wouldn’t overthink it. No one’s 100% perfect. Some twerps are overall loveable.

Absolutely disgusting. Unfortunately though I’m not overly shocked, I’ve heard of quite a few crass vulgar one-liner stories and they all tend to be from the same calibre of men; thick, uneducated and chavvy.

The irony out of all of this as well, is if he’d told you he needed time to go home to shower and you replied “Good don’t want your arsehole stinking” he’d think “Ew nasty cow” (and rightly so). However women never talk like this. These demeaning remarks only ever come from men.

Don't understand the joke OP but can guess. Really can't stand that kind of talk; anything to do with genitals from someone you don't know that well (or even if you do know them), especially derogatory references, crass jokes that sound like they come from the 1970s; nudge nudge, wink wink; can't stand it. I'd be moving on with a 'dodged a bullet' attitude, but up to you where your boundaries are.

🤮 a respectful gentleman would never say such a thing. So many gross men out there. I’d never date him again

I definitely think it’s funny.

I’m surprised so many people have taken such offence to it.

Even if she did mention her dog, that's definitely not what he means.

🤣🤣🤣 I'd of laughed ,,if he's otherwise been ok benefit of the doubt .

@Datingwoee It's a crass joke, but is it worth ditching someone over this?

There are loads of men who do things a lot worse than this, and yet, their partners don't break up with them.

Is this not a situation in which you can say you didn't like the joke because of X, and then move on?

I wouljdn't be up for a shag after that comment.

If there are really no other red flags, I'd probably cancel the date but not the man. Yet.

I'd cancel for the lol, never mind the growler.

He's definitely trying it on.

It’s not just the presumption, it’s the suggestion that your vagina might smell if you didn’t freshen up. It feels like negging

"I'd have you" is quite declarative.
Because women are meant to be taken. 🙄

It is the presumption isn't it? It is so bloody telling.

OP, go with your gut here. Not with standing that this tells you a lot about his humour, attitude to women and cultural references, he now thinks that you are a sure thing. It is possessive and creepy language and to me would be a massive red flag in 2026. God knows what his mates are like if this passes for humour.

Instant ick.

And definitely feel a bit nauseous.

Don’t tell him why though so he can continue to reveal himself early doors for future victims dates.

I cancelled on someone for a comment that went along the lines of ,
’I wouldn’t need to take you to bed , I’d have you on the stairs’
Im no prude but I hadn’t slept with him and I felt it was massively overstepping and made me uncomfortable . Instant ick .

Only you know how you feel OP , but fact you posted this gives you your answer in my opinion.

Eww! That would be immediate ick for me, with no coming back. Crude & vulgar, which may be ok if you'd known each other a long time/shared that kind of humour but after 5 dates it's a hard no. If you do cancel and are truthful about why, be prepared for a barrage of defensive insults. His macho ego won't be able to cope that his behaviour is at fault.

This means you have low standards.

I'd find that very crass and think we probably weren't well suited.