To cancel date over his ‘joke’?

Don't think there is anything I detest more than men:

• Using derogatory terms for womens vulvas,
• Making jokes whilst using such derogatory terms.

If you had been with him for 30 years I can see why this may be interpreted as funny, but when you barely know them it is just repulsive and demonstrative of significant immaturity. Ew. Bin.

”vote with your growler” made me snort my wine! And I don’t disagree, there is some truth in that.
And no, women are not responsible for men, of course. But if ALL women collectively stood up and said NO? No, I won’t accept disrespect, no I won’t shag you, you married moron, no, i deserve better than you, you idiot who has weaponised incompetence to PHD level? It would change the world as we know it.

Men are not lonely enough. We owe it to our fellow women to clamp down on shit like this. Vote with your growler. Thank you, next.

It never gets better, will only get worse.

@Datingwoeewhat did you decide ?

I'm not surprised that you still remember and talk about it decades later, that's how disgusting it is. What a load of cope.

Cancel. Lots of reasons

1.Offensive language.
2.Childish language ('growler' FFS), indicates juvenile immaturity never good in a partner.
3.Presumptious (to thinks he's even going to get close).
4.Misogynistic (stereotype of a woman smelling. next week he'll mention fish)

but most of all

IT'S DISRESPECTFUL TO YOU. This never changes. A person (man or woman) either treats others and partners with respect or they don't. It's not a good life with a partner treating you with no respect.

Hard no I say.

& for the people excusing it as a 'silly comment' - growler?? really??? I suppose it depends what you are willing to tolerate but I expect a partner on the same level of maturity and intelligence and educational level (including vocabulary) as me. Low standards there.

Grim. End of.

It would be the last for me.

This - immediately and with no regrets.

Gross and immature. Bin him with immediate effect 🤢

This! Honestly people are so busy looking for red flags, the person has to be absolutely perfect and not put a foot wrong. So he said a silly comment. I'd do exactly what the poster above said and sound him out, unless of course, he has form. Decades ago my husband said a stupid and classless joke about women's bits, turns out he was just mindlessly repeating something his 'friend' had said, which makes sense as it was out of character for him. We both agreed after it was in very poor taste. Sometimes I still tease him about it. 2 kids and a long marriage later really it wasn't the be all end all. Men are just literally from Mars sometimes, they don't have the same empathy chip or emotional intelligence that comes naturally to women. Sorry I know NEM, but from my experience, it's true!

What’s his TikTok name? I need to see this.

Childish and disrespectful tbh. He's shown you who he is. See you later 👋

none of us can form an opinion as we don't have enough facts, we have some replies taking up a moral stance as if they've waited til married before getting undressed in the dark on a Saturday night after match of the day ( uk ) then we have the realists vast majority of women in uk don't even wait til first date just hook up with online matches, some on first night knowing nothing, then we have friends with benefits, 1night stands and so on.. growler is a much used frivolous term used by men and women especially those who enjoy sex .. yes it's immature term used by men and women .. I know 1 middle aged woman very much middle class who uses the c word to describe herself, not for me but I bet her previous men would use that term frequently in later relationships because they would assume its acceptable, I wouldn't find it acceptable, but growler I would laugh and think he's 14 ,

Urgh, he sounds thick as fuck if he thinks it’s funny! I’d dump him and tell him why!

Theres a couple of well known TikTokers, a man and a lady that are in a relationship and have kids, and all he does is make jokes about her ‘fanny smelling’. He’s really thick and ugly but thinks he’s hilarious

Then don’t subject yourself to it, I suppose. Your presence isn’t required.

I would be repulsed by that comment, hence my use of the word. The type of man, or woman, that would use that phrase or find it acceptable/humorous isn’t the type of person I have any interest in associating with. So I don’t. I’m fortunately not surrounded by or limited to rough people, so I can’t say I’ve ever found this to be a problem at all.

You deserve better, to be honest

Cancel immediately!🙄

Just when you thought the bar couldn't get any lower, now she should thank him!

I don't know why people say sarcasm is the lowest form of wit. Sarcasm done well can be an absolute glory, a fine art. The lowest form of wit, by far, is some graceless, braindead mook going "hur hur ur vag smells" and it's not elevated by the fact that some women are prepared to simp over it to prove how cool and bantsy they are.

You need to think more long-term. If it’s this comment today it’s gonna be a multitude of devilish banter for the rest of your life together. Perish the thought. You’ve either got to get rid now or grow a sense of humour. If you’re this upset over that comment he would be miserable dating/marrying you anyway.

Just playing devils advocate here… there is always another perspective to consider…maybe he’s trying to tell you something about the time you had sex… is it possible your growler may have been a bit whiffy? There might be some weird reality here where his ‘icky’ banter turns out to me useful advice. You could have thanked him for the advice, freshened up, got married, had kids and lived happily ever after! Food for thought…

it’s what we did in my day

No, it’s what people of your calibre did (and still do). The fact that you’d consider a man making jokes about your smelly vagina to be a real thigh slapper, says more about you than the rest of us.

Say it was just a joke and not an implications of anything at all somehow... its a really skanky joke!

Years ago, I went on a date with a bloke who, when he picked me up, leaned across me me & emptied his ashtray into the gutter. It disgusted me but I didn't do anything. I could have saved myself 5 years of shit if I'd walked away. If something sets the alarm off, go with the alarm.