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Headteacher criticised my daughter's water bottle

337 replies

Suchevilforebodings · 23/06/2026 11:29

Slightly annoyed at my DD's headteacher. She is 8 and in Y3

I packed her bag yesterday morning and noticed as I filled up her water bottle that it was leaking from the lid. Grabbed another only to see it was split down the side. Annoying but one of those things.
When dropping her off at school, we popped into the local shop next door and grabbed her a large plastic bottle of water with a spout lid.

She came home from school yesterday and said that her headteacher, when visiting the classroom, had picked up her bottle from in front of her and told the whole class that this kind of bottle was "very bad" as it "ends up in the ocean and kills sea turtles" and a "proper" water bottle is much better to bring into school.

She's a very sensitive child was really quite upset and being told she's killing turtles, which she loves, and also at what she perceived as being "in trouble" as she loves school, is a good pupil, and hasn't ever been told off.

I get that the head isn't actually wrong, and I wouldn't normally buy bottled water but it was a "needs must" situation.

Was this an appropriate way to bring it up?

OP posts:
NinaGeiger · 23/06/2026 14:05

Suchevilforebodings · 23/06/2026 13:36

I'm thinking Prince William might be a good shout. If tampongate2 is anything to go by, he quite likes involving 8 year old girls who have no real choice in order to make points.

Actually, he might not be my guy. Maybe I'll suggest the headteacher contacts him.

What's tampongate2?
Nothing is coming up when I Google it.

(Obviously I know about the original Tampongate2)

(Completely agree with you about the HT being unreasonable)

CinnamonBuns67 · 23/06/2026 14:05

I'd tell him it's not his place to comment on a specific childs water bottle infront of the whole class and make your child feel guilty and to possibly encourage other children to also make her feel guilty and that if he has a problem with what you buy her he can take it up with you directly in future instead of picking on a little girl.

ChocolateApples · 23/06/2026 14:04

I think he was insensitive. I would use this an an opportunity to talk to your daughter about two things
a) why reusable ones are best and hence why we try to use those most of the time. But sometimes there will be exceptions and that's okay too. We recycle to minimise our impact.
b) sometimes when people make a valid point/snap judgement they don't have all the facts behind something. But I'm sure the head wants to encourage reusable bottles in general and that is still a good thing. He could have given a little more grace, but it's worth your daughter realising neither she nor the head is 'bad'. This is just one of the little moments of friction that life comes with.

Chocyulelog · 23/06/2026 14:04

Suchevilforebodings · 23/06/2026 13:55

A couple of mistakes there -

  • you're assuming I'm "outraged". I am not. There is rarely anyone actually "outraged" on threads like this. And yet, there is always someone who wants to say how silly it is that they are outraged. I even said in my OP that I was mildly annoyed, largely because I completely expected some comment about "outrage".
  • I didn't want opinions on whether or not it was worth me posting this. I wanted opinions on the actual thing I was talking about. So while you can say what you want, you don't have to "pack it in" I' not the boss of you, you are mistaken in thinking I asked for your opinion.

But yes, please do pack it in, because as I said, there's always one, on every thread, and it's so so boring and unoriginal.

Edited

Whats boring and unoriginal is yet another mum worrying that her little darling, who happens to be quite sensitive, has verbatim repeated a comment a teacher made and now needs to check if this was completely out of order and needs to be cross at the teacher, because said child is so very upset.

I'd be teaching my child resilience in this instance - "your water bottle isnt great no but its the best we could do so ignore the comment" and move on with your day. Done. Or perhaps even giving the teacher the benefit of the doubt that it wasn't said like that. And moving on with my day.

NinaGeiger · 23/06/2026 14:02

viques · 23/06/2026 13:57

I am a bit surprised since your dd apparently had two non working bottles that no one else in your family had a spare she could have used for the day.

I'm not. They never seem to last long in our family

C8H10N4O2 · 23/06/2026 14:00

Suchevilforebodings · 23/06/2026 11:48

It's a he, btw :)

He's new to the school this year, and I don't know if he's trying to make a firm impression or assert himself or something but a few people have said he is a bit gung-ho about some things. A few people have said he apparently made a Y5 cry on the first day back in September, over uniform, but tbf to him I don't know true that story is

Another over promoted man in the primary sector?

Humiliating eight year olds for something they have not done is shockingly bad form for a teacher of this age group let alone a head teacher. I wonder what the (usually female) staff think of their new head?

That kind of comment should be generalised to a class discussion or assembly.

Suchevilforebodings · 23/06/2026 13:59

viques · 23/06/2026 13:57

I am a bit surprised since your dd apparently had two non working bottles that no one else in your family had a spare she could have used for the day.

Damn, you caught me, I just saw an opportunity to kill a turtle and took it.

OP posts:
Megifer · 23/06/2026 13:59

viques · 23/06/2026 13:57

I am a bit surprised since your dd apparently had two non working bottles that no one else in your family had a spare she could have used for the day.

Are you normally so easily surprised 😂

SevenYellowHammers · 23/06/2026 13:59

I’d be inclined to drop his PA a quick email explaining and then forget it

viques · 23/06/2026 13:57

I am a bit surprised since your dd apparently had two non working bottles that no one else in your family had a spare she could have used for the day.

EmeraldShamrock000 · 23/06/2026 13:57

I wouldn’t be happy using this as a class lesson for a sensitive child, it’s an important message.
I send mine in with a flip water bottle everyday. They’d hate me.
The annoying bottle return scheme will be introduced in England, October 27, it’ll help with the guilt.
I recycle the bottles for my 15c back.

Suchevilforebodings · 23/06/2026 13:56

Bigmove25 · 23/06/2026 13:46

Humour. What's yours?

I thought it was funny x

OP posts:
Suchevilforebodings · 23/06/2026 13:55

Chocyulelog · 23/06/2026 13:45

  • @sprigatito In all honestly I dont disagree with the sentiment of your responses at all & yes this is a chat forum and we should be able to chat about things however trivial, I apologise.

What I was trying to (somewhat clumsily) get across and what I still cant understand is this modern need to disect every trivial interaction and find offence in it, and then get outraged. And headteachers have such a horrific time of it from parents as it is and then people are wanting to you complain about a comment you weren't there in person to hear!! On a similar vein, telling someone to "pack it in" isnt very open to hearing people's opinions of which you asked for in a community forum is it. You're someone who only wants people who agree with you to comment - why use a public forum then?

Edited

A couple of mistakes there -

  • you're assuming I'm "outraged". I am not. There is rarely anyone actually "outraged" on threads like this. And yet, there is always someone who wants to say how silly it is that they are outraged. I even said in my OP that I was mildly annoyed, largely because I completely expected some comment about "outrage".
  • I didn't want opinions on whether or not it was worth me posting this. I wanted opinions on the actual thing I was talking about. So while you can say what you want, you don't have to "pack it in" I' not the boss of you, you are mistaken in thinking I asked for your opinion.

But yes, please do pack it in, because as I said, there's always one, on every thread, and it's so so boring and unoriginal.

OP posts:
ClaudiaWankleman · 23/06/2026 13:54

Bigmove25 · 23/06/2026 13:54

Bit like your username then?

My username isn't a joke or intended to be funny?

Bigmove25 · 23/06/2026 13:54

ClaudiaWankleman · 23/06/2026 13:49

To tell you it wasn't funny in the slightest to anyone with an IQ above 12?

Bit like your username then?

TheDenimPoet · 23/06/2026 13:54

LondonKara · 23/06/2026 11:46

She's a very sensitive child was really quite upset and being told she's killing turtles, which she loves, and also at what she perceived as being "in trouble" as she loves school, is a good pupil, and hasn't ever been told off.

Whilst I think the head could have been more sensitive herself, I do think at 8 your daughter is quite extraordinarily sensitive to be upset to this degree. It's amazing she has got to year 3 without ever being told off, and I do think as a life skill she needs to learn to roll with the punches a little more, the real world is going to hit her hard at some point otherwise.

Honestly? I got through the whole of my education from nursery to university graduation without getting told off even one time. Some kids genuinely are just good!

It would have upset me, too, if this had happened. Because it's not the girl's fault, her mum gave her the bottle (and of course she had an absolutely valid reason for doing so on that particular day!)

It's like kids getting told off for being late. It's not their fault!

Imseriouslyyouguys · 23/06/2026 13:53

GisGasGus · 23/06/2026 12:13

The rest of the class would know who it belonged to, of course it's embarrassing
Any adults would struggle with a similar situation never mind an 8 year old

If it happened to my child I'd definitely be speaking to the HT about it

Oh I see, you’re “that mum”.

purplecorkheart · 23/06/2026 13:52

If that happened in a workplace regularly it would be considered bullying. If the Head-teacher had such an issue then it should have been raised with the parent. An eight year old has no say in what water they are given.

MrsEmmelineLucas · 23/06/2026 13:50

Suchevilforebodings · 23/06/2026 13:48

What? 😂😂😂

Don't pull at that thread.

OutwiththeOutCrowd · 23/06/2026 13:49

I would think it bullying behaviour if an office manager strode into an office and picked up someone's water bottle and made a similar comment to all and sundry. I don't think this is different. The fact that he is a head teacher in a school is irrelevant. He doesn't have to teach through humiliation.

ClaudiaWankleman · 23/06/2026 13:49

Bigmove25 · 23/06/2026 13:46

Humour. What's yours?

To tell you it wasn't funny in the slightest to anyone with an IQ above 12?

Suchevilforebodings · 23/06/2026 13:48

This reply has been deleted

This has been deleted by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines.

What? 😂😂😂

OP posts:
riceuten · 23/06/2026 13:47

Don't bring it up at all. Do you think the Head will change his/her mind if you do?

Katemax82 · 23/06/2026 13:47

I would definitely complain! How nasty to humiliate a child!!!!

Bigmove25 · 23/06/2026 13:46

ClaudiaWankleman · 23/06/2026 13:45

Water fountains don't require cups. What is your point?

Humour. What's yours?

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