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Headteacher criticised my daughter's water bottle

337 replies

Suchevilforebodings · 23/06/2026 11:29

Slightly annoyed at my DD's headteacher. She is 8 and in Y3

I packed her bag yesterday morning and noticed as I filled up her water bottle that it was leaking from the lid. Grabbed another only to see it was split down the side. Annoying but one of those things.
When dropping her off at school, we popped into the local shop next door and grabbed her a large plastic bottle of water with a spout lid.

She came home from school yesterday and said that her headteacher, when visiting the classroom, had picked up her bottle from in front of her and told the whole class that this kind of bottle was "very bad" as it "ends up in the ocean and kills sea turtles" and a "proper" water bottle is much better to bring into school.

She's a very sensitive child was really quite upset and being told she's killing turtles, which she loves, and also at what she perceived as being "in trouble" as she loves school, is a good pupil, and hasn't ever been told off.

I get that the head isn't actually wrong, and I wouldn't normally buy bottled water but it was a "needs must" situation.

Was this an appropriate way to bring it up?

OP posts:
Suchevilforebodings · 23/06/2026 11:51

LondonKara · 23/06/2026 11:46

She's a very sensitive child was really quite upset and being told she's killing turtles, which she loves, and also at what she perceived as being "in trouble" as she loves school, is a good pupil, and hasn't ever been told off.

Whilst I think the head could have been more sensitive herself, I do think at 8 your daughter is quite extraordinarily sensitive to be upset to this degree. It's amazing she has got to year 3 without ever being told off, and I do think as a life skill she needs to learn to roll with the punches a little more, the real world is going to hit her hard at some point otherwise.

Oh she has plenty of punches to roll with at home, with big brothers :)

OP posts:
Onmytod24 · 23/06/2026 11:49

You mentioned her sensitivity as if it’s a good quality. she must’ve been wrong sometime in her life when you or other people have told her off is it all part of growing up?

Suchevilforebodings · 23/06/2026 11:48

It's a he, btw :)

He's new to the school this year, and I don't know if he's trying to make a firm impression or assert himself or something but a few people have said he is a bit gung-ho about some things. A few people have said he apparently made a Y5 cry on the first day back in September, over uniform, but tbf to him I don't know true that story is

OP posts:
LondonKara · 23/06/2026 11:46

She's a very sensitive child was really quite upset and being told she's killing turtles, which she loves, and also at what she perceived as being "in trouble" as she loves school, is a good pupil, and hasn't ever been told off.

Whilst I think the head could have been more sensitive herself, I do think at 8 your daughter is quite extraordinarily sensitive to be upset to this degree. It's amazing she has got to year 3 without ever being told off, and I do think as a life skill she needs to learn to roll with the punches a little more, the real world is going to hit her hard at some point otherwise.

Ionlymakejokestodistractmyself · 23/06/2026 11:45

BillieWiper · 23/06/2026 11:40

I hate stuff like this. It's like, we buy a bottle of water and then we put it in the recycling. We pay our taxes for the council to remove it responsibly. And make it into something else? Or sell it to someone who will. If it ends up in the ocean it's hardly the consumer's fault?

Well, ideally consumers wouldn't be the ones responsible for how the world works but we do need to take individual responsibility too.

Yes the head could have been a bit more sensible and it was a shame your DD was the example, but her message was spot on and will hopefully make an impact.

I was like your DD when younger and tbh I wish someone had helped me to toughen up a bit and learn to roll with the punches, fail more and do better. Having zero criticism - and learning how to deal with it - is actually not that helpful long term IMO, I'm not massively resilient or good at coping with failure.

BillieWiper · 23/06/2026 11:40

I hate stuff like this. It's like, we buy a bottle of water and then we put it in the recycling. We pay our taxes for the council to remove it responsibly. And make it into something else? Or sell it to someone who will. If it ends up in the ocean it's hardly the consumer's fault?

ClaredeBear · 23/06/2026 11:38

Such a shame she delivered such an important message this way! Hopefully you can provide some reassurance to your daughter.

TheyGrewUp · 23/06/2026 11:38

The HT humiloated the child in front of her peers. I think it was poor form. That's a message given in assembly in a generalised way.

Paradoes · 23/06/2026 11:37

Ridiculous of the HT to do that to an 8 year old in a heat wave.

SwanRivers · 23/06/2026 11:36

She's a very sensitive child was really quite upset and being told she's killing turtles, which she loves, and also at what she perceived as being "in trouble" as she loves school, is a good pupil, and hasn't ever been told off.

Just put her straight and make sure she knows the HT didn't say her one bottle is going to personally kill turtles.

And of course make sure she knows she's not in trouble.

The HT worded an important message in a clumsy way so I'd use the opportunity to point out that adults don't always get it right.

Mistymaglets · 23/06/2026 11:35

The message was absolutely correct and I doubt that the headteacher personalised it at your daughter and actually accused her personally of killing turtles.

However I do understand how she could take it that way if she is sensitive, but the best thing that you do is agree with the message and congratulate your daughter on the fact they you actually don't normally use these bottles and forget about it.

sprigatito · 23/06/2026 11:31

No, how utterly ridiculous and clumsy of the Head - is she usually like that? I would be very annoyed indeed.