Feeling uncomfortable after sharing a seat with a very obese passenger

All of which is irrelevant if the other person takes up YOUR space and makes YOU uncomfortable. That's just not fair at all.

I was morbidly obese for many years and always made a point of not encroaching in other peoples' space wherever possible. I'd always aim for a seat with no one sat next to, or even stand on a very busy bus/train rather than trying to squeeze into a sit next to someone. On planes, I'd book the emergency exit seat if available (over wing where it's 2-2 instead of 3-3, to seat with DH), or a front extra legroom seat or if all else fails, an aisle seat rather than a central or window seat, or sometimes, business class. I never felt I had any right to make someone else uncomfortable or squeezed it.

I don't "require" Two though. My body fits into one seat. But I'll be squashed against the person next to me.

Do you not think the airline have some responsibility. The seats are small for many people. Thin people are also squashes into each other

And yes, @ilovepixie sending you hugs. ❤️

In rural areas, they often use coaches for longer distance "bus" services which do have seat belts.

Yes, I agree, although you cant point out SPAG errors as it's seen to be a bit petty 😳🤣 (no apologies from me though, as I'm an editor so I guess I'm doing it too often in my job so I notice it more 😉)

So am I @ilovepixie

I don't know why people don't catch themselves about being so unkind in their attitudes.

I'm amazed how many people don't know the difference between lose (no longer have) and loose (free/untied/unboundaried) and not just on MN.

ilovepixie

I'm so sorry for your losses and everything you're going through.

Theys hould have a selection of larger seats that people can choose to buy

They (the airlines) often do...possibly/probably not on their short haul fleets but on the Long Haul side of things many have Premium Economy or Business Class or even First.

Oh, woe is you. Having to actually breathe the same air as an obese person. Gasp. Gosh. The embarrassment.

HOW DARE YOU MOAN ABOUT HER WEIGHT? You don't know her circumstances. I've no doubt that she's had a lifetime of fat shamers like you who have decided she's " let herself go, " etc.

She may have genuine physical or mental problems relating to her weight; she might be suffering crippling periods, menopause, or have some sort of physical disability that stops her exercising/weight controlling. She might be OK with her weight - think of Dawn French.

She might actually just be a big, fat lazy slob that does nothing but eat; there could be a trillion reasons why she's so obese, but I fail to understand what business her body is of yours.

And how do you know she's ''happy''? I would definitely not be if I had to sit next to a pompous motormouth like you.

Grow up and get a life.

No but I'm so glad you did: always has me in stitches.🙄

I guess you're the same that you are looking out for that old favourite.

You absolutely are shaming, and you sound absolutely vile.

I’d rather sit next to an obese person any day of the week than next to someone so judgmental and nasty as you.

She can lose weight if she decides to, it’s a lot harder to change your spiteful attitude, focus on that instead.

But it's not "because you're fat", it's "because we sell these in units and you require two".

Unless that test case from years ago did find that passengers buy transit, not seats. I don't know how that went. At any rate, it's isn't about shaming, it's about purchasing the necessary resources.

Edited to answer your edits: arguably, if you can't afford the service you require, you'll have to go without. Plenty of thin people can't afford even one ticket.

You can buy an extra seat on the train or aircraft, look at the seat size options

I was replying to the poster who said that it should be mandatory for fat people to have to pay for two seats.

It's fat shaming because the fat person has to pay more than the thin person.

I definitely wouldn't be able to afford to pay for two seats on aeroplanes.

I can't be bothered reading the whole thread but has anybody come up with the "when your arse is the size of a small countreeeee" line yet?

It wouldn't be fat shaming them. Anyone could purchase an extra seat if they fancied the extra space or just wanted to make sure nobody was next to them. But if it was a plus size person who needed it, they could be refunded for the extra seat if the plane isn't full.

Airlines absolutely can do this and many already do. There's nothing shaming about it.

A selection of larger seats is a possibility but assuming you don't mean existing premium economy options, it would involve reconfiguring the plane, make pricing even more complicated than it already is and you couldn't guarantee that only plus size people would decide that they fancy the extra space.

Eating is often a comfort for me, and certainly something I find brings me pleasure especially after a lot of trauma following a head injury and post concussion syndrome then medication induced movement disorder. I've always loved my food but now I am perimenopausal, I have to be more mindful of how it affects my whole body (teeth, gums, waistline, cholesterol etc - bloody menopause lol 😆).

I'm exercising more now but I need to lose at least a stone. If I carried on eating what I used to, I would get big. Being injured and not in control of my body meant eating feels like a way I can control my body, up to a point.

I'm avoiding sugar now more too, as it makes my teeth hurt quite a lot when it never used to. And I know my mum doesn't understand this, as she made a comment just this weekend about how i avoided ice cream for pudding, saying how it wont poison me (!) People have their complex reasons around eating (or not!) and often, others don't always understand how or why it will affect them.

Two seats wouldn't work for safety reasons. I tried to sit on two seats on a plane and I was slipping off.

They need to have specially designed larger seats. the seats that they have at the moment are tiny

To answer your question, what makes you think she is happy? Most people who are obese would prefer not to be and most will have tried anything and everything to improve their weight. However obesity is complex. It isn't just a case of deciding not to overeat and if you have always been able to control your eating or maintain a healthy weight then you probably won't get it. I understand you are annoyed at being squashed up, that's entirely valid but to question how someone got fat or can be happy fat is a bit disingenuous (and goady).

Airlines can't do that as it would be fat shaming people.

What airlines should do is realise that not one size of seat fits everyone.

Theys hould have a selection of larger seats that people can choose to buy

There isn’t extra wide seating, generally.

The idea is that if you need to, you get two, because you are using the relevant space.

Even as a fairly big woman, I don’t disagree with that, if I’m taking up space that otherwise would be paid for, it’s reasonable to expect to pay for it.

You're not wrong, a small proportion of obese people can't help it, a significant number could if they prioritised it.
I'd see no problem with requiring people above a certain size to pay for two tickets.

Tell me exactly, what can an overweight person do on a flight?

There is no option most of the time, to purchase a larger seat.

On my last flight i was able to purchase a flight with extra leg room for tall people. There was no option to purchase an extra wide seat though

I think, in truth, some people just like to be annoyed.

There’s a lot of perpetually enraged people about at the moment.