Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Feeling uncomfortable after sharing a seat with a very obese passenger

535 replies

Bayleaftree63 · 22/06/2026 22:03

On public transport earlier. A very large woman sits nexts to me. She couldn’t get the seat belt
round her. Her body spilt over into my seat, leaving me squashed with what little space there was left.

On the journey I couldn’t help be annoyed at the lack of space I was left with and questioning how do people let themselves get to that size. Talking morbidly obese, not just larger - whatever the medical
term.

This isn’t about shaming, more I’m in disbelief people being that big are happy? Why wouldn’t you want to loose some weight for a healthier lifestyle.

OP posts:
JHound · 23/06/2026 14:20

Bayleaftree63 · 22/06/2026 22:03

On public transport earlier. A very large woman sits nexts to me. She couldn’t get the seat belt
round her. Her body spilt over into my seat, leaving me squashed with what little space there was left.

On the journey I couldn’t help be annoyed at the lack of space I was left with and questioning how do people let themselves get to that size. Talking morbidly obese, not just larger - whatever the medical
term.

This isn’t about shaming, more I’m in disbelief people being that big are happy? Why wouldn’t you want to loose some weight for a healthier lifestyle.

Siiiiiiiiigh…..

ThatCyanCat · 23/06/2026 14:19

Mumbles11 · 23/06/2026 14:16

What if they can't afford two tickets?

What if they can't afford one?

Mumbles11 · 23/06/2026 14:19

It's only from reading this thread that I see how cruel a lot of thin peoople are.

They see overweight people generally as disgusting with no thought put into how that person got to be that weight

I became overweight after a sexual assault.
I know a man who became overweihht after the death of his daughter.
My colleague is overweight because she has arthritis in her knee

Etc

Honeyhonay · 23/06/2026 14:19

Mumbles11 · 23/06/2026 14:16

What if they can't afford two tickets?

How entitled that you think everyone's cost should go up to accommodate you.

ThatCyanCat · 23/06/2026 14:18

Mumbles11 · 23/06/2026 14:07

If you can't see that people are different to luggage, I don't know eaht to say.

For example if a person has an illness/injury that makes them prone to gain weight.

And an airline makes that person pay more.

That person can easily sue the airline for discrimination

They can sue but they won't necessarily win.

https://www.latimes.com/archives/la-xpm-2000-dec-14-me-65405-story.html

It's from 2000. I can't find a more recent case but would be interested if there is one.

LA Times logo

Airline Passenger Loses Suit Over Weight Discrimination

Courts: Judge throws out claim by overweight woman who was required to buy an extra seat for return flight to Burbank.

https://www.latimes.com/archives/la-xpm-2000-dec-14-me-65405-story.html

Mumbles11 · 23/06/2026 14:16

LordofMisrule1 · 23/06/2026 14:16

idk why people are being disingenuous about seatbelts. Megabus/national coaches have seatbelts. That's public transport.

YANBU OP, it's infuriating. Especially in hot weather, reducing the airflow around your body and having someone else's body heat up against you, often sweaty and sticky. It's just awful all around.

People need to book two tickets if they need two spaces.

What if they can't afford two tickets?

Mumbles11 · 23/06/2026 14:16

ThatCyanCat · 23/06/2026 14:10

If they offer the option of purchasing a second seat, that's the standard met. It's totally impractical to make every seat large enough to fit the biggest possible passenger. It really is not the same as buying a new chair for your single security guy.

How much more are you prepared to pay for your flights? Bear in mind the industry is hammered at the moment with fuel price hikes.

As I already wrote, I won't be paying more.

And that will never be implemented.

Companies will never be allowed to discriminate against people because of their weight.

At the moment, it is mainly the thin people suffering on airlines as they are getting squashed. If you are happy with the squashing then so be it.

I think they should give an option for larger chairs and suck up some cost to improve customer experience

LordofMisrule1 · 23/06/2026 14:16

idk why people are being disingenuous about seatbelts. Megabus/national coaches have seatbelts. That's public transport.

YANBU OP, it's infuriating. Especially in hot weather, reducing the airflow around your body and having someone else's body heat up against you, often sweaty and sticky. It's just awful all around.

People need to book two tickets if they need two spaces.

notimagain · 23/06/2026 14:12

Double post in error

notimagain · 23/06/2026 14:12

Mumbles11 · 23/06/2026 14:04

In your scenario. You are describing thin people as the "normal" Weight and anyone of a larger size as an abnormal weight. When people are actually all shapes and sizes

In your scenario, at what BMI should be people be forced to pay more?

No idea...I didn't mention BMI..

As I recall it from industry publications passenger seat sizing was decreed by the likes Boeing/Airbus, usually based on fitting the (?) 95 percentile so you'll have to take sizing up with them.

Funny though how thirty is years ago almost everyone was a fan of airline deregulation in Europe,.now the race to the bottom is biting people in the backside you hear lots of voices wanting regulation brought back in.

Ultimately bigger than standard economy seats are available with many carriers on many routes...but not so much in Shorthaul and people have to be prepared to pay for them.

ThatCyanCat · 23/06/2026 14:10

Mumbles11 · 23/06/2026 14:01

It is comparable. Every organisation has to meet basic health and safety standards.

I don't know how airplanes are getting away with what they are doing.

Overweight people can't fit safely into a seat. Thin people can't fit safely into their seat as they are squashed in.

This is in a moving vehicle high in the air, wheresafety is very important.

If they offer the option of purchasing a second seat, that's the standard met. It's totally impractical to make every seat large enough to fit the biggest possible passenger. It really is not the same as buying a new chair for your single security guy.

How much more are you prepared to pay for your flights? Bear in mind the industry is hammered at the moment with fuel price hikes.

OrangeCrushes · 23/06/2026 14:09

solvendie · 22/06/2026 22:12

Spilled not spilt (past tense)

This is incorrect. They are basically the same and spelling comes down to regional preference.

Mumbles11 · 23/06/2026 14:07

Honeyhonay · 23/06/2026 13:42

Why should the be the same price though? You pay more to take luggage that weighs a larger amount.

If you can't see that people are different to luggage, I don't know eaht to say.

For example if a person has an illness/injury that makes them prone to gain weight.

And an airline makes that person pay more.

That person can easily sue the airline for discrimination

Mumbles11 · 23/06/2026 14:04

notimagain · 23/06/2026 14:01

Lots of H&S doesn't apply in the aviation world for often good reason.

As for forcing the airlines to provide bigger seats - if you can also force people to pay the increased fares (which would be needed) , and if you can force all foreign operators serving the UK to comply with UK rules then I guess it's an option worth considering..........

In your scenario. You are describing thin people as the "normal" Weight and anyone of a larger size as an abnormal weight. When people are actually all shapes and sizes

In your scenario, at what BMI should be people be forced to pay more?

Mumbles11 · 23/06/2026 14:03

notimagain · 23/06/2026 14:01

Lots of H&S doesn't apply in the aviation world for often good reason.

As for forcing the airlines to provide bigger seats - if you can also force people to pay the increased fares (which would be needed) , and if you can force all foreign operators serving the UK to comply with UK rules then I guess it's an option worth considering..........

Are you thin or medium or large weight?

Mumbles11 · 23/06/2026 14:02

From listening to thin people on this thread, aeroplanes, buses and trains were definitely designed by thin people!

There is a complete lack of understanding of what larger bodied people need

notimagain · 23/06/2026 14:01

Mumbles11 · 23/06/2026 13:37

It's not the only alternative

The other alternative is that health and safety regulations regulate airplanes better, and tell them that they need to have seats that people can actually fit into

Lots of H&S doesn't apply in the aviation world for often good reason.

As for forcing the airlines to provide bigger seats - if you can also force people to pay the increased fares (which would be needed) , and if you can force all foreign operators serving the UK to comply with UK rules then I guess it's an option worth considering..........

Mumbles11 · 23/06/2026 14:01

ThatCyanCat · 23/06/2026 13:58

But that's one person in one situation in one place. It's not comparable to reconfiguring every plane for every flight in the world.

It is comparable. Every organisation has to meet basic health and safety standards.

I don't know how airplanes are getting away with what they are doing.

Overweight people can't fit safely into a seat. Thin people can't fit safely into their seat as they are squashed in.

This is in a moving vehicle high in the air, wheresafety is very important.

VoReason · 23/06/2026 14:00

This reply has been deleted

This has been deleted by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines.

ThatCyanCat · 23/06/2026 13:58

Mumbles11 · 23/06/2026 13:54

What are you on about.

My work place recently hired a new security guard. He is a very large man. Very tall and also overweight. He didn't fit into our desk chair. We are not going to have him standing all day are we.

My work place ordered an extra large chair for him to sit on.

Edited

But that's one person in one situation in one place. It's not comparable to reconfiguring every plane for every flight in the world.

Mumbles11 · 23/06/2026 13:54

Honeyhonay · 23/06/2026 13:51

I honestly don’t know what you’re taking about, task seating is mostly a standard size and workplaces will order 100 of the same chair or whatever their staff numbers are, bus seats are all the same size, train seats are the same size, seats in the theatre or concert venue are all the same size.

What are you on about.

My work place recently hired a new security guard. He is a very large man. Very tall and also overweight. He didn't fit into our desk chair. We are not going to have him standing all day are we.

My work place ordered an extra large chair for him to sit on.

grumpygrape · 23/06/2026 13:53

This reply has been deleted

This has been deleted by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines.

Good for you but these drugs are not a silver bullet (sorry, that genuinely isn't meant to sound nasty)
Some people aren't suitable and we certainly don't know the long term effects.

ThatCyanCat · 23/06/2026 13:53

Mumbles11 · 23/06/2026 13:15

I don't "require" Two though. My body fits into one seat. But I'll be squashed against the person next to me.

Do you not think the airline have some responsibility. The seats are small for many people. Thin people are also squashes into each other

What do you want the airline to be responsible for exactly?

Personally I think the solution is to have a very easy to use system whereby a person who requires two seats can very easily purchase them and have them actually next to each other (there have been cases where people do buy two seats but they're in different rows or across the aisle from each other, which obviously is useless). Then if the plane isn't full, they should be refunded for one. This is what a lot of domestic American airlines do and I think it makes sense.

I guess airlines could reconfigure all their seats and sizing but seats would have to be really impractically large to make sure nobody would ever require a second one and that would mean many fewer tickets available, and all of them more expensive. There needs to be a solution for when someone requires a second seat.

I don't want plus size people to be shamed or treated poorly, and I also think people should be able to use the space they've paid for so they aren't cramped up uncomfortably for goodness knows how long, potentially hurting themselves.

Anyone who just doesn't like the sight of a fat person can practise the ancient art of looking at something else.

Honeyhonay · 23/06/2026 13:51

Mumbles11 · 23/06/2026 13:48

I think you are the insane one.

How can you not see that airlines need to meet basic health and safety regulations?

Would you expect a large male teacher to sit in a seat that only one of his arse cheeks fits into - for four hours?

It would give him back pain

I honestly don’t know what you’re taking about, task seating is mostly a standard size and workplaces will order 100 of the same chair or whatever their staff numbers are, bus seats are all the same size, train seats are the same size, seats in the theatre or concert venue are all the same size.

Mumbles11 · 23/06/2026 13:50

This reply has been deleted

This has been deleted by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines.

Like every drug out there, people have different reactions and side effects to drugs.

I had to stop taking mounjaro as it gave me constantly severe nausea and diarrhea to the point that I was missing work

Swipe left for the next trending thread