Feeling uncomfortable after sharing a seat with a very obese passenger

Judging by this thread, it is attitudes to overweight people that need to change.

People are taking about overweight people on this thread like they are serial killers with leprosy.

"Eewwwww I saw a fat person. So diagusting. How dare she even exist"

I don't know anyone who can afford business class

It's been a long time since I've been shocked by a thread. But I've been shocked by this one.

So people just choose to be overweight?

What about people with arthritis in their knees who can't exercise. What about people with a long term injury who can't exercise?

Two examples of many

Alot of overweight people aren't happy with their weight and we live in a 'fattist society.
Being overweight is often associated with a an eating disorder and those people need support, not vilification.
It's a vicious circle for those involved, they become more and more secluded because of society's prejudices.

Perhaps the arm rests should just come right down to the seat to stop any spreading.
If the seat isn’t comfortable for you at the standard size it’s your choice to travel at all or upgrade for business.

Do they?

That's funny! Because Katie Price's (the celebrity's) son has an uncontrollable disease that causes him to gain a huge amount of weight.

He can't control it

“She didn’t choose to let herself get to that size”. Of course she did. Everyone in the UK knows how to prevent themselves from getting obese.

I'm doing some Googling and everything I find is showing that courts generally uphold that plus size passengers should purchase two seats and many carriers stipulate this. The exception seems to be internal flights in Canada.

However, people who try to sue airlines after being squashed by a bigger person who spilled into their seat don't have much luck either.

I'm certainly no expert but if anyone can find relevant links about this, I'm interested. I believe there was a case in America some years ago where a plus size passenger claimed they had purchased transit while the airline claimed they'd purchased a seat, but I can't find any details.

I am very sorry to hear this.
Have you been able to access any support?

I don’t even think it’s necessarily just about encroaching on other people’s space, it’s very basic cost vs use.

Airplane seats come in the size they come in. They are sold in units. If you need two, you pay for two. The seat you’re using additionally is worth an amount of money, that someone will either pay and end up with you sharing with them, or the airplane company would lose if they just start giving that space away.

It’s very, very obvious that when there is a cost attached to a service you’re using, you should pay more to use more of it.

I honestly can't believe some of the people on here. It's like we are living in the nazi era.
Anyone not young and healthy should be fined.

How lucky for you that you are a normal size and don't suffer from disability, illness or addiction that causes you to gain weight.

Disgusting.

YANBU to have been annoyed by how uncomfortable it made you but YABVVVVU to frame your OP in terms of wondering why she doesn't just magic herself into a healthier body. Of course fat people know they are fat and would like to not be. How ridiculously patronising. She didn't choose to let herself get to that size and you have no idea what practical, mental, medical/hormonal and financial barriers are currently stopping her from improving her health.

That said, she should also have the courtesy to know and adjust her behaviour accordingly if she takes up more than a standard seat-width in public transport. If on a flight she needs to let the airline know that she is wider than the seat and book two seats, and on buses should not sit down next to someone who is already in the window seat of a pair in such a way as to squash them. It's perfectly possible on a bus to sit on the aisle seat sideways (knees in the aisle) so as to not squash another passenger - though obviously that's not possible on a plane.

Yes, they have the right, but is it fair at someone else's discomfort ?

I would be a bit miffed too - I pay the same amount for a seat and she gets hers plus some of mine !

Good luck trying to get that to pass.

They'll be hit with discrimination lawsuits.

My mother is overweight because she had polio - the disease - as a child. She was in hospital for a year and one leg is paralysed. She can't exercise so she puts on weight nore quickly than able bodied people do

Agreed. Why should the normal sized person suffer by having half of their seat taken off them through no fault of their own?

No, I think people who take up their space and the space next to them, when that person has also paid for their seat, to pay for the space they need.
If someone fits in a regular seat it’s not an issue.
Airplane travel is an optional activity, you could drive or take a train or ferry.

I don’t know why you think bringing up individual people is relevant or necessary, cheap airfare isn’t a human right.
When I travel with a baby on my lap I pay extra for the privilege, a tall person pays extra for seats with more leg room. These sorts of additional charges already exist.

A parallel situation is someone like my DH who is very tall and always pays extra to sit near the emergency exit because there is more legroom. He's just being practical and accepting the reality of the situation.

It's the perils of modern life isn't it. We are all squashed in everywhere and individual people's cant be met on such a large scale. I have joint issues, being squashed into a seat beside an overweight person would likely mean I'd be in pain. The overweight person might have their issues that mean they need a seat and a half. Both needs compete with each other and by default in this case the overweight persons need for a seat and half wins out. We'd all love for our needs to be met in every situation but sometimes it just isn't possible.

It would not be discriminatory to charge larger people for two seats. It would just be a reflection of the amount of size they require to be comfortable (and for their immediate neighbour to be comfortable).

There are facts (that they require more space), and there are biases that don't reflect facts (the bias that they should be charged the same as others to the detriment of their neighbour).

This is firmly the fault of the people building/buying the airplane/bus to specifications that don't suit the top 95th centile of weight.
The fact that obese people are very sensitive to this discussion is understandable, and they deserve to be treated respectfully of course, but it doesn't change anything.

Oh my god. You couldn't make it up.

For a third time

Many people have illnesses and disabilities that cause them to be overweight. It is not their choice.

Then don’t be that unhealthy that you need 2 seats ??? It shouldn’t be other peoples responsibility

Yet again. What about people who suffer from illnesses that make them out on weight.

The coldness on this thread is astounding

Are you actually for real?

I can't believe it!

You want people to be charged more because they are overweight

Using one famous example . Katie Price's disabled son, Harvey, has a disorder that makes him put on weight.

So should he, a disabled man, be charged twice the price, that you are charged?

Fuc...king disgusting

Then they don’t fly. Flowing over into someone else’s space is selfish. It’s not ‘fat phobic’ to point this out. I’m a rather chubby BMI 25 and airline seats are very roomy width wise. People who take any interests whatsoever in their health should have no problem fitting in them.

I watched my morbidly obese DM count calories every day when I was living with her. She is still morbidly obese. She once plateaued at 400 calories a day. Calorie deficit doesn’t work because some foods lay down as sugar and fat. Reducing those will reduce weight.

I have never counted calories, have no idea how many calories there are in anything and I don’t know if I’m in “calorie deficit”.

I do know that I eat a lot of eggs, vegetables, nuts and seeds, berries and yoghurt and roast meat because that’s what I eat every day between 11 and 7pm. I also know that if I eat crisps or drink alcoholic, which I do occasionally, I don’t lose weight that week. My DH also dieted himself out of Type II diabetes eating a low carb, high fat diet. His blood pressure and risk factors for heart attack and stroke are all down as well.

And of course insulin resistance is contested. The diet industry makes a fortune out of it. Why would they give that up?