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Original poster

Friend has gotten really funny due to my weekend away with man

363 replies

Laurenn25 · 22/06/2026 18:22

I’ve been single for three years, single Mum to primary age DC who I’ve put first during that time. Only recently did I start looking to date again, I’ve met someone who I get along really well with and we’ve arranged a weekend away for mid-July.

My best friend had been on for a while about the two of us going away for a weekend, but for various reasons I didn’t outright commit to this. I told her it would depend on a few factors including finances.

I’ve told her about my planned weekend with the man I’m seeing and she got really funny and asked is that why I can’t go away with her. I said it wasn’t as simple as that. She said we’ve been friends for years and as soon as I’ve got a ‘sniff of cock’ I’ve dropped her. I haven’t dropped her at all.

It’s true I probably could have gone away with her, but I didn’t commit to it and can’t afford two trips now. She has made me feel a bit crap.

OP posts:
GrandmasCat · 22/06/2026 22:25

She said we’ve been friends for years and as soon as I’ve got a ‘sniff of cock’ I’ve dropped her. I haven’t dropped her at all.

For that comment alone I would have unfriend her. You do not date in years and you have a first nice weekend away with new man and she is talking to you as if you were a slut? Bollocks to that.

Not all friendships are suitable for traveling together. I love my best friend to bits, talk to her all the time but, I don’t think I would ever go away with her again, she has far too much energy for me. I also have an old friend who I care for but… the few days we have travelled together were hell so like you, I can find a lot of acceptable reasons not to travel with her even if I like her very much when we are at home. I’m sure some friends may find me unbearable when away as well.

ruethewhirl · 22/06/2026 22:20

Laurenn25 · 22/06/2026 18:40

I can hardly turn round to her and say ‘you are overweight and I can’t cope with your snoring’ can I?

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Sorry, you said this was your best friend?? Some friend you are. Part of me is hoping she sees this thread, recognises the scenario and bins you off.

Original poster
Laurenn25 · 22/06/2026 22:18

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Aren’t you a delight. Your parents must be very proud.

OP posts:
IrritatingToy · 22/06/2026 22:09

She’s right

havingoneofthosedays · 22/06/2026 22:06

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LittlePetitePsychopath · 22/06/2026 22:02

Laurenn25 · 22/06/2026 18:30

We see each other 3/4 times a month, she has some habits which to be honest grate when I’ve had a weekend away with her before, the suggestions she made were all pricier than I’d have liked (I made other suggestions which she wasn’t keen on).

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If this is true then your issue is that rather than acknowledging you couldn’t find something you both wanted to do, you took the softer route and blamed circumstance, and now it looks to her like you got a better offer.

Calliopespa · 22/06/2026 21:58

BitOutOfPractice · 22/06/2026 20:58

You sound worse and worse.

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Yes. That post spoke volumes on several fronts.

IsawwhatIsaw · 22/06/2026 21:57

I had a friend do this to me years ago.
shed said we’d go on holiday together, so I booked leave.
then just casually told me she was going away instead with her -relatively / new boyfriend. The friendship wasn’t the same after that and basically ended soon after

ClairDeLaLune · 22/06/2026 21:57

Restlessdreams1994 · 22/06/2026 21:52

Did you outright say no to going away with her or did you string her along with vague excuses whilst having no intention of actually going? If it was the latter, I can see why she’s upset.

If it’s former I can see why she’s upset too. Sisters before misters. YABU

Calliopespa · 22/06/2026 21:57

Laurenn25 · 22/06/2026 20:34

From what I can gather, he eats a healthy diet so hopefully the state of his bowels reflect that.

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Something is really off about this post.

Restlessdreams1994 · 22/06/2026 21:52

Did you outright say no to going away with her or did you string her along with vague excuses whilst having no intention of actually going? If it was the latter, I can see why she’s upset.

Phonicshaskilledmeoff · 22/06/2026 21:48

Laurenn25 · 22/06/2026 18:22

I’ve been single for three years, single Mum to primary age DC who I’ve put first during that time. Only recently did I start looking to date again, I’ve met someone who I get along really well with and we’ve arranged a weekend away for mid-July.

My best friend had been on for a while about the two of us going away for a weekend, but for various reasons I didn’t outright commit to this. I told her it would depend on a few factors including finances.

I’ve told her about my planned weekend with the man I’m seeing and she got really funny and asked is that why I can’t go away with her. I said it wasn’t as simple as that. She said we’ve been friends for years and as soon as I’ve got a ‘sniff of cock’ I’ve dropped her. I haven’t dropped her at all.

It’s true I probably could have gone away with her, but I didn’t commit to it and can’t afford two trips now. She has made me feel a bit crap.

Just tell her he’s paying

ChipswithMayonnaise · 22/06/2026 21:44

Jackiepumpkinhead · 22/06/2026 21:39

Family yes, I agree with you there. A man, absolutely not coming before my closest friends.

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But getting from seeing random bloke to having a family requires committed dating...

ChipswithMayonnaise · 22/06/2026 21:43

PeoplesNet · 22/06/2026 20:46

Ah man, this site is full of uptight, judgy 90s women, looking at vote outcomes. A) thank you for the laugh, that was hilarious, and B) good for you! Imagine being such a shit friend, you tear them down for trying to get some dick, instead of encouraging them! Ffs. Not a good friend, is she.

To be fair to her: maybe it felt like you were stringing her along. Could you apologise for having not been upfront and maybe explain you didn't want to speak too soon and ask her to be happy for you?

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I am 90s vintage and thought the voting was skewed by 21st century MRA.

Jackiepumpkinhead · 22/06/2026 21:39

ChipswithMayonnaise · 22/06/2026 21:03

Missing a comma, sorry.
Intimate, love, or other relationships.
Translation: a sex holiday, a romantic getaway, or time settling in with a newish partner or time alone with an established partner.
OP's friend cannot meet all OP's needs in these respects.
I am going on a couple of friends holidays this year, but definitely prioritise family.

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Family yes, I agree with you there. A man, absolutely not coming before my closest friends.

Beeloux · 22/06/2026 21:38

Tell her he’s paying for it. I’d be the same as you OP. She sounds petty.

TracyBeakerSoYeah · 22/06/2026 21:37

Chocyulelog · 22/06/2026 19:19

If my friend had been single for 3 years and wanted to prioritise a weekend away with a new man, I'd be ecstatic for her! Going away with a friend is completely different to a date. She's out of order. * *

I agree

ChipswithMayonnaise · 22/06/2026 21:36

Unexpectedlysinglemum · 22/06/2026 21:10

She led her friend down the garden path saying they’d do a trip together though. And her friend is right, she is prioritizing the new man due to his genitals

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The friend was not satisfied with what the OP could afford, and wanted a more expensive trip. It sounds like they talked through options, but did not agree. They still see each other every week.

OP has written unkindly about her friend's physique. That's a separate issue.

ETA there is nothing wrong with pursuing sex and friends should not cockblock.

Jackiepumpkinhead · 22/06/2026 21:35

Cosyblankets · 22/06/2026 21:03

We go for a week!

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Me too, twice a year!

Walkerzoo · 22/06/2026 21:32

My pal does this.

I stopped being the support mechanism and the place where she runs to when the man goes away.

Be cautious of your choices

Piratesue · 22/06/2026 21:32

Oh man, go away and enjoy yourself!!! She should understand, is she single?

NiftyKoala · 22/06/2026 21:24

I sure hope the friend doesn't have mumsnet

Sunshineandgrapefruit · 22/06/2026 21:21

You are getting a hard time op. Perfectly reasonable to want to spend time with your new man and if she doesn't get that she maybe needs to remember what the honeymoon phase is like. Tell her you still want to go away with her and this isn't stopping that but you have been single a long time and fancy a dirty weekend which is completely different to a girls weekend with her.

darksideofthetoon · 22/06/2026 21:19

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Pillowaddict · 22/06/2026 21:18

While I totally agree you should be able to prioritise whoever you would prefer to go away with, you're speaking really nastily about your friend in your updates. You're not a great friend to say such hurtful/rude things about her weight, sleeping and bathroom habits, and you should have been honest about not fancying a trip with her rather than being vague and up in the air, potentially preventing her from finding someone else less bitchy & two faced to go away with.

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