Shall I go out on my own tonight

Well OP is still visiting the place he goes go
like a puppy dog looking for scraps. Maybe next time he will be with his partner and that will put an end to this nonsense.

You clearly say in your first post that you have been ‘chatting/flirting for a while now’.

This doesn’t imply a single instance where you met him, walked back to hotel and kissed, then found out he was in a relationship.

You also state that you go to this place every couple of months - yet you’ve made plans to go back presumably quite quickly to have agreed dates with this chap.

Personally I think this all sounds a bit premeditated!

Op, don't worry about what he wants. What he wants is a) unknown and b) irrelevant. Not sure why that has become a focus.

You want to go. It's obvious.

The reason you are concerned is because you are worried what the cheater might think - but honestly, by going and ignoring him you'll send a bigger message than by not going at all.

And not going won't benefit anyone.

If you go on your own and you don't enjoy it - then leave.

You have the power to do exactly what you want, when you want to.

Make a coffee
sit outside for a bit

But she hasn't done anything wrong. Unless assuming that a man who flirts with and kisses you is single is a crime? You may live somewhere that there are loads of places to go and have a good time, but a lot of people don't. Regardless, why should the OP not get to go to her preferred place, because of a sleazy man?

He’s shitting himself that she’s gonna grass him up to his missus.

Men are simple creatures. He wants a simple life without the threat of OP potentially telling his partner he’s a cheating wanker.

You know the place having been before and I think therefore you should go. Probably will help you avoid this man if he is there.

It absolutely was

Of all the times to tell her he’s in a relationship it is in response to the op asking if he’ll be at the club.

I'm not so sure that he doesn't want her to go, if they've been flirting for a while, it sounds like he goes to this club without his GF. It sounds to me like he's been tempted by the OP and things have gone too far, after they've kissed he's decided to fess up about his girlfriend. Be interesting to see whether he's sensible tonight and keeps his distance, or not.

You sound very naive, nothing is ever your fault, you haven’t done anything wrong. Is that what you want to hear? You clearly like him but he's not available. Keep going to the places he and his mates go to because it’s not like there’s anywhere else to go out to a good time.

Since when does a cheating bloke get to tell her that she should t go back to the same club she enjoys because he would be there. Surely he was just letting her know that he was t available so don’t go just to see him. I’ve had a beer on my own in a pub but never been to a club but I suspect once you are in there no one will know you are on your own. Your friends could be anywhere in there.

Why can't you go to the club, chat to other people and ignore the man you kissed? If he approaches you just say you're not interested because he's married. And don't let him walk you home. Nobody could despise you for that.

No one is stopping her!! Hell, she can rock up anywhere she darn well likes

bit if you bothered to read the Op… she cares what he thinks

Why? Why would you let whatever he thinks stop you from going out and having a good night??
Avoid him, dance the night away, have fun.
I wouldn't give a crap if he doesn't want you to go. It isn't his club and you don't have to talk to him

I honestly think you're overthinking this. A man isn't stopping you doing anything. You're stopping you doing it

Why does he get to decide where she can and can’t go. He probably doesn’t want her there in case his partner finds out he’s a sleazy cheat but why should that be @Jammydodger70concern?

I'm not sure he told her not to come, merely that he was in a relationship. What right would he have to tell her what to do anyway? He's just some random she kissed THEN. found out he wasn't single

I don’t see why you should miss out just because of a lying man. As the saying goes- shame should swap sides. You have done nothing wrong at all. Go, and have fun, it’s good to extend your comfort zone by doing things alone.

To be fair op, the way you have written your post reads as if you don’t give a shit he’s in a relationship and you’re happy he’ll be there tonight. That’s how I read it until you said you didn’t know he was in a relationship until after you’d kissed him.

He doesn’t get to decide who goes to a public nightclub. The OP has clarified, numerous times, that she’s not going for him. It will be pretty easy for her to stay out of his way.

Imagine if women just stayed home every time a man didn’t want them in their space! Fuck that.

@Jammydodger70
You go girl
Enjoy yourself

You're not a stalker so who gives a damn what others think.

Yes but I was pointing out that he clearly doesn’t want the op to go.

if you do decide to go op, he will no doubt avoid you.

but honestly… I just wouldn’t bother tonight