AIBU to challenge the school’s wording about pupils rolling skirts up?

'No its your language that’s concerning, deeply concerning'

I haven't said anything deeply concerning, I've suggested people stop looking up skirts as they go upstairs, why is that concerning? I've said teachers should put as much effort into teaching as they do into micro managing clothing. They should perhaps do a work experience at a college and see how the male teachers there cope with short skirts, legging and <gasp> even tight shorts.

Stop sexualising teens. The amount of times I've seen 'it makes the menz uncomfortable' on this very thread is what is 'deeply concerning'.

We were rolling skirts up in the 60s and 70s

We did not roll them up as short as girls do nowadays. And we didn't have the skin tight lycra that rides up over your bum that you have to be constantly tugging down.

And we often wore underslips, too.

'Maybe if you gave some positive, instead of random rants , people would see your point of view'

Page after page about 'sweaty arse cheeks' yet I'm the one doing random rants?

The posts don't seem to show any concern for welfare of kids, more just disgust and revulsion at gussets and 'arse cheeks'.

We've lived in different places I've seen many school kids at drop off and pick up. I walk past a senior school every say at kicking out time, I just see young kids. That's it. I don't inspect their attire. Stop blaming girls for men 'being uncomfortable'.

Don’t be bloody stupid OP! It’s a real issue…and the school is pointing this out ffs! The girls are flashing their arses and underwear…it’s utterly appalling and needs to stop!

I (primary school teacher) was driving to an appointment at around 3:30 today, past the local comp…I was genuinely appalled by the number of arses and knickers on display…from really young girls too, as well as the older girls. It’s insane that parents are not doing something to be honest. If one of my girls were walking round with her bum cheeks on display for all and sundry to perv at, I’d be mortified!

'No its your language that’s concerning, deeply concerning'

I haven't said anything deeply concerning, I've suggested people stop looking up skirts as they go upstairs, why is that concerning? I've said teachers should put as much effort into teaching as they do into micro managing clothing. They should perhaps do a work experience at a college and see how the male teachers there cope with short skirts, legging and <gasp> even tight shorts.

Stop sexualising teens. The amount of times I've seen 'it makes the menz uncomfortable' on this very thread is what is 'deeply concerning'.

'The thing for me here is that there was an incident in recent weeks where a girl of about 15 / 16 was raped and she'd been hanging around sand dunes at 3am near a tented homeless community - some people were against people stating that she shouldn't have been there because they were in the same feminist mindset - but the reality is we know as women these things aren't safe! It's wrong to encourage women and young girls not to take protective measures because they should have the right not to, yes we shouldn't have to but we do'

Such an appalling false equivalence. Yes women should be careful as we know and being alone in high risk areas is not looking after oneself.

This is about skirts in school. The oft sneered at 'arse cheeks' the poor menz who feel 'uncomfortable'. Posters walking up stairs and staring at said 'arse cheeks', one even got so close to see a tampon string!

If only teachers paid as much attention to teaching. These letters about uniforms get fired off at regular intervals yet attend a parents evening and half of them are sat open mouthed trying to work out who your dc is.

Seriously, back off. Stop staring and stop treating these girls like they are trying to entice the poor men.

As for comments about 'nude' coloured items. Myob.

The language on this thread is what is 'deeply disturbing'. The misogynistic constant sneers about 'sweaty arse cheeks' and the presumption that teen girls are all trying to entice men.

Seriously, these outdated attitudes need to change.

Stop looking up girls skirts as they walk upstairs and any men that 'feel uncomfortable' are the problem. Not the young girls.

Dress appropriately- hard agree

dress your age? Can you elaborate?

Oh do stop trying to encourage or excuse this pressure on girls. It’s not poor menz it’s women too who find this revolting and uncomfortable too.I wouldn’t want to see men, women or boys hanging round with their buttocks hanging out either . Funny how you’re not advocating everybody do the same. It’s almost as if you want girls to walk round like this . Deeply worrying.

'The thing for me here is that there was an incident in recent weeks where a girl of about 15 / 16 was raped and she'd been hanging around sand dunes at 3am near a tented homeless community - some people were against people stating that she shouldn't have been there because they were in the same feminist mindset - but the reality is we know as women these things aren't safe! It's wrong to encourage women and young girls not to take protective measures because they should have the right not to, yes we shouldn't have to but we do'

Such an appalling false equivalence. Yes women should be careful as we know and being alone in high risk areas is not looking after oneself.

This is about skirts in school. The oft sneered at 'arse cheeks' the poor menz who feel 'uncomfortable'. Posters walking up stairs and staring at said 'arse cheeks', one even got so close to see a tampon string!

If only teachers paid as much attention to teaching. These letters about uniforms get fired off at regular intervals yet attend a parents evening and half of them are sat open mouthed trying to work out who your dc is.

Seriously, back off. Stop staring and stop treating these girls like they are trying to entice the poor men.

As for comments about 'nude' coloured items. Myob.

Yes . Dress your age and appropriately for the occasion are the two rules that have worked pretty well so far.

To those with DDs how do you talk to them about their style of dressing?

Some recent posters are getting to the heart of it.

Yes, clothing and fashion are a form of expression. Unfortunately curent ‘fashion’ is centred around a look driven by patriarchal norms and the male gaze. Incredibly short skirts, hot pants etc are part of that. Whether or not actual men are ogling them (and I agree that it is men’s’ responsibility not to be perverts and not to ogle children, however they are dressed), school should be a place where girls are exempt from the pressure to dress in a way designed to present their bodies for the male gaze. A place where their value and their social capital is not based on how closely they fit a patriarchal norm (see also rules about fake lashes, tan etc), but on who they are. In this sense, uniform can be seen not as restriction but as freedom from a society which values women and girls primarily on their appearance.

Also: I’m a teacher. You absolutely do see bum cheeks. Sadly. The wording of the email in the OP was very likely based on the fact that is really is ‘not a good idea’ to wear a skirt which reveals your bum, the wings of your sanitary pad, etc. not because of men but because it’s embarrassing and not smart and not appropriate!

Weekly newsletter today from DC’s secondary school contained a paragraph on uniform including the fact that there have been complaints from the public about “pupils who choose to wear skirts” rolling them up to wear them extremely short. It finishes with asking parents to speak to their children about why this is “not a good idea”.

Now, apart from the fact I assume that they must mean girls, is this not clearly implying that short skirts = making themselves vulnerable and if is, then if anything bad happens as a result it is their own fault? I thought we had moved beyond this kind of nonsense.

I only have boys at the school not girls but want to write to the head to point out how utterly sexist this is. DH agrees with me pov but thinks I shouldn’t write. AIBU?

Some recent posters are getting to the heart of it.

Yes, clothing and fashion are a form of expression. Unfortunately curent ‘fashion’ is centred around a look driven by patriarchal norms and the male gaze. Incredibly short skirts, hot pants etc are part of that. Whether or not actual men are ogling them (and I agree that it is men’s’ responsibility not to be perverts and not to ogle children, however they are dressed), school should be a place where girls are exempt from the pressure to dress in a way designed to present their bodies for the male gaze. A place where their value and their social capital is not based on how closely they fit a patriarchal norm (see also rules about fake lashes, tan etc), but on who they are. In this sense, uniform can be seen not as restriction but as freedom from a society which values women and girls primarily on their appearance.

Also: I’m a teacher. You absolutely do see bum cheeks. Sadly. The wording of the email in the OP was very likely based on the fact that is really is ‘not a good idea’ to wear a skirt which reveals your bum, the wings of your sanitary pad, etc. not because of men but because it’s embarrassing and not smart and not appropriate!

Weekly newsletter today from DC’s secondary school contained a paragraph on uniform including the fact that there have been complaints from the public about “pupils who choose to wear skirts” rolling them up to wear them extremely short. It finishes with asking parents to speak to their children about why this is “not a good idea”.

Now, apart from the fact I assume that they must mean girls, is this not clearly implying that short skirts = making themselves vulnerable and if is, then if anything bad happens as a result it is their own fault? I thought we had moved beyond this kind of nonsense.

I only have boys at the school not girls but want to write to the head to point out how utterly sexist this is. DH agrees with me pov but thinks I shouldn’t write. AIBU?