AIBU to challenge the school’s wording about pupils rolling skirts up?

Well no I was the one purchasing said uniform and in charge?

'The girls should be dressings respectfully and definitely not just be "dressing as they please". The same reason they shouldn't be wearing a bikini in school even if they really want to'

I said 'in other areas' girls dress as they please so these poor uncomfortable boys will have to cope with a thigh once in sixth form/"college"/grammar school/ whatever you want to call it.

Dress codes can be encouraged without the hysterical bare arsed/sweaty/bare bummed body shaming spouted throughout this frothing thread.

Who suggested wearing a biking to school? What have bikinis got to do with anything?

Oh I bet you were SO disappointed that your kids abided by all the uniform rules @Gloriia !!!

Still… very odd to have been so passive about the fact that throughout all your kids schooling you thought only the “odd” teacher was competent and the others ones basically failed your children - but you go hell to leather on mumsnet threads but when it comes to RL and your kids education it’s is 🤷‍♀️ no biggie approach

Nothing, I'd have rolled my eyes and ignored. I only used to contact school in dire emergencies. I'd have avoided interaction about silly newsletters for my own sanity.

Disclaimer dc abided by all rules and I thankfully I wasn't ever summoned for a telling off.

They shouldn't be made to feel uncomfortable at all. The girls should be dressings respectfully and definitely not just be "dressing as they please". The same reason they shouldn't be wearing a bikini in school even if they really want to. I doubt the girls would like it if their male classmates were wearing speedos.

I don't know much about "college" (because all my children just stayed on at the grammar school) but that's a dress code to adhere to. I don't know why you think it's appropriate to show underwear or bare bums at school. It's quite normal that it would make people feel uncomfortable. I honestly think if girls dress like this they should expect their male classmates to look, it's only natural.

Dress codes are fine yes. And they should be policied yes. So girls can't wear whatever they like.

Really? Because Id feel deeply uncomfortable if I had to spend my days working alongside men/boys if they were as undressed as you seem to feel is natural and normal in girls. It is not for everyone else to just "take responsibility" for their feelings (or walk around with their eyes shut) because teenage girls want to get their arse and bits out. We live in a society where its considered normal to keep certain parts of your body covered, unless, it seems, you are a young woman. And you want to double down on this? Makes me suspect your motives tbh.

I for one, if I had a daughter would be telling her not to have it short.
The girls need to have a bit of class, and not look sleazy.
After all, it would be giving the boys the wrong impression.

@Gloriia what would you have done in the OP’s shoes?

Oh please. Stop with the 'men/boys feeling uncomfortable' 'raging hormones' enabling.

They have to learn how to cope with 'feeiing uncomfortable' as women and girls rightly dress as they please in other areas and once in college there's no knee length skirts and thick tights to hide these apparently offensive gussets and 'bare buttocks'.

This is the perfect opportunity to teach boys <and male teachers it seems> that their 'feelings' are their responsibility and they need to develop strategies to cope

Dress codes fine. Imposed and policed reasonably and without weekly hysterical emails. All the 'exposed buttocks' hyperbole, nope.

Well that’s a bit weird

Photo attached is from a uniform shop.
Now imagine the skirt being rolled up far enough to bring the bottom of the skirt in line the with hem of the blazer.
You’ll see a lot more than just leg.
Now combine this with no tights and a tho f.

This is no different when I was at grammar school 1960-1965 and mini skirts were all the rage. We rolled the skirts up at the waistband but if a teacher stopped you they made you kneel and if your skirt didn’t touch the floor you got a detention. Why can the teachers not exact the same rules now?

Do you not think in a mixed secondary school, the boys (with raging hormones and feelings of attraction) might be a bit uncomfortable constantly seeing the exposed buttocks and/or underwear of their female classmates? Some might (due to the nature of human biology) instinctively look?

So then the complaint should be about flashing. Not short skirts.

And why are you mentioning boys? Who cares what they think.

No - read the thread. It's not about shorter skirts as most people understand them. It's a specific, very extreme fashion which, once you've seen, you won't forget.

Rolling up your kilt a bit isn't the issue.

Ours did really well but the freqent whiny emails and memos about clothes and lunchboxes were so very tedious. Face to face meetings often had flustered teachers unable to tell you the basics but could probably recite chapter and verse about lunch content or skirt length rule breaking.
Priorities seem a bit fucked in some schools, that is all.

@Gloriia

I agree that teachers shouldn't have to do some of the things they do, but that's the situation we are in. They have to tick so many boxes.

I was trained in the days before the National Curriculum and Ofsted and I spent most of my time planning and teaching and marking. I saw the job transformed beyond recognition in my time. It's not the choice of teachers to do box-ticking activities - they are forced to by policies from government or from the school management.

It's better all round if parents can just understand this and support the teachers by not making a fuss over trivialities.

Oh - and the advent of email has made teachers' lives much more difficult. the amount of time they must have to spend on that boggles the mind. Once, if you had an issue you had to go and find a pen, paper and stamp and sit down, compose your thoughts, go out and post it etc etc. Now any fool can just shoot off a rude email and the teacher has to answer it professionally and usually with lots of research and conferring with busy colleagues.

Let teachers teach! I think we can agree on that, Gloriia, but it takes parents to back off and let them do their job rather than challenging them over school rules which they haven't made but have to enforce. I understand that you yourself didn't necessarily do that all the time, but I'm talking generally.

I wonder what kind of parenting is going on at home

But they do. I wouldn’t have believed it if I hadn’t seen it with my own eyes. School uniform with bare buttocks in front of me. As in no pants (but presumably a thong). It’s just really grim and grubby. I can’t imagine even the most rampant of adolescent boys finding this anything other than nauseating.

The unofficial second uniform at my local secondary is an arse height rolled up pleated skirt (yes pp's you can absolutely roll up a pleated skirt - it forms a tutu shape which looks even more stupid than the normal skirts after rolling up) paired with knee socks.

The knee socks make the whole look even more ridiculous. The girls constantly tug their skirt down / hold it closed while walking. Its painful to watch, you can see the awkwardness shining through.

Yep 🤷.

There are constant double standards at play here, we wouldn't accept boys exposing themselves so why do we accept it from girls with the explanation that they can wear what they want without being judged.

The move towards leisure wear has meant its acceptable to wear skin tight shorts that show every part of your arse and pelvic area. If men started walking round in the equivalent with their cock and balls clearly outlined for everyone then there would be uproar. There is a basic level of common decency.

Why even bother with the bikini? How about completely in the nip?

Nobody should feel they have the right to tell her what she should (or shouldn't) wear; they can just look away if they don't want to see her; respecting other people isn't relevant; it isn't any kind of safeguarding issue; and it doesn't interfere with her studies, which is all that matters..........

Just because you think it looks ridiculous does not mean they do. You are mistaking your opinion for fact.

What kind of sad bastard makes a complaint to a school about a school girl choosing to make a short skirt shorter?

Unless she is literally flashing her underwear / genitals to unsuspecting passersby what is there to lodge a formal complaint about?