AIBU to expect payment when my sister's boyfriend used my concert ticket?

Sorry but you should have made it clear from the start that you wanted payment, and if you thought you might want to sell the ticket you should have given your sister a cut-off date to make a decision. It was up to you to do that, not her. Once things had got to that stage, it’s not reasonable to expect the bf to pay because he probably didn’t particularly want to go and the alternative would heave been to waste the ticket completely.

He stepped in to use a ticket that would have otherwise gone to waste, to a concert he wasn’t bothered about going to.
I wouldn’t have expected him to pay for it, it does seem a little odd you would have preferred it go to waste.

Exactly the same thing happened to me. I was going to take DGD and a friend to a concert, at the last minute I couldn’t. DGDs friends DF stepped in and offered to pay for my ticket. In the end he couldn’t go.

Thankfully someone else stepped up and I did not expect that person to pay for ticket. Two happy teenagers!

How much was the ticket?

You had 6 months at least to sell the ticket and you never, It would of went to waste if he didnt use it.

He shouldnt have to pay for it. I hope he enjoyed it anyway.

It was the sister's fault though for not telling OP in good time that her daughter wasn't going. OP had given her months to say if N was going or not.

Very convenient that BF could make it "last minute"

Had my DSis text me beforehand to check it was ok I would have said I expect him to pay, at that point at least a token amount.

Good grief how incredibly grabby of you.

You had lost the money by not selling it on, someone using the ticket at the last minute instead of wasting it would have been fine by me... the original cock up was yours anyway!

If absolutely no one else was going to buy it from you, then you're being petty.

I think you should have been much clearer. Both that you wanted payment and giving a date that she had to let you know by so you could have sold it elsewhere if she didn’t want it for DN. By not doing that it does imply that you weren’t that bothered. From their perspective I assume that they thought you weren’t trying to resell it so they may as well use it rather than it go to waste.

I’ve quite often been given tickets for things for free that a friend can’t attend because they don’t want to waste it, so I think it’s not unreasonable for it be assumed you don’t want payment unless told otherwise

Would you rather the ticket went to waste? I would get charging DS1 if she took her DD as that would have stopped you selling. But the BF taking a last minute ticket that was going to not be used you can’t expect payment

If it was me, I wouldn’t expect payment. We’ve had a couple of events where one of us couldn’t go, so the other invited a friend and we just gave away the ticket.

However, I think in your case it was really off that your sister delayed working out if her daughter could go, so you missed out on selling it. That isn’t fair.

I’d let it go. I have given away (for free) long-booked tickets to friends when dh has later been unable to go. Better than wasting them.

So you would have expected your DSis to go to a concert on her own? You let her down, so she had to scramble to get someone else to go.

These experiences are always more fun with someone - you dont want to go alone

He did you a favour by using it so it didn’t go to waste. You should have sold it as soon as you realised you couldn’t go.

So what you’re basically saying is that you would rather the ticket remained unused and you got no payment? Rather than someone who wasn’t that fussed about the concert going along?

I agree with the vast majority here: you double booked yourself, it was your responsibility to sell the ticket. It sounds like the sister who dithered and didn’t respond for ages was also a bit unreasonable but to be fair, you could have pushed her to make a decision and explained you needed time to sell the ticket.

if it had been something that the boyfriend really wanted to go to, wouldn’t he have offered to buy the ticket earlier? By your own admission, he wasn’t bothered and only used the ticket as it was going to waste so it seems unreasonable to expect payment from him.

You could not have sold your own ticket leaving your sister to go herself.

Of course she could-assuming that the sister is an adult and not mentally incapacitated. Plenty of people go to concerts alone.

YANBU - your sister used your ticket for her own family (doesnt matter if it was her daughter or partner) so she should pay for your one

Sneaky sister you have there! Sounds like she planned this by delaying telling you about her daughter, giving you no time to sell

Edit done

You let your sister down by double booking you should be glad she was able to find someone else to go with.

You could not have sold your own ticket leaving your sister to go herself. Be glad it went to good use and sister was not inconvenienced by your double booking.

How much was the ticket?

I wonder if you are caught up here because you've wasted a significant amount of money and are annoyed at yourself.

A token amount or full amount should be paid if someone enthusiastically wants to go and them taking a ticket prevents others buying it.

A last minute seat filler to keep your sisters company (bearing in mind you kind of let them down too when they thought you would be there with them/ maybe an extra person sharing car park charges or taxi charges) who doesn't necessarily want to be there- no they don't need to oay.

You believed the ticket had been wasted, you should be pleased to know something was salvaged.

This one is completely on you. It would have been fine if you wanted to try and get the money back (if you were able to resell it), but you needed to make that clear right from the start. “Sorry, realised I’ve double booked myself. Do you know anyone who’d like to buy my ticket? otherwise I’ll try to sell it online”.
You cannot expect money for it after the event when you’ve made no real attempt to sort anything out.

If you wanted money for it you should have sold it.

Do you mean you would rather have had the ticket go to waste than have DSIS boyfriend go for free? That makes you sound dreadful tbh.

So you would have preferred the seat to be empty and the ticket to go to waste?

odd mentality

You wouldn’t have the money for the ticket even if he hadn’t taken it, so that horse has left the stable.

It might be nice if he bought you a bottle of wine to say thanks but since you didn’t stipulate that you wanted payment that is about all you can expect I think.

You made no effort to sell it on. It just comes across like you found a convenient excuse to claw back some of the money you wasted on the ticket. Which is unfair considering you were perfectly happy for no-one to use it at all

There' a lot of 'expect' in your post and not much communication. You needed to speak with your sister regarding whether your niece was going or not and get a definite yes or no ("I need to know by tomorrow night" or whatever) As it was all very last minite I would not be expecting the boyfriend to pay. I would let this go.