CRP level and DP’s reaction, would you be upset?

Surgeon is supposed to be one of the careers that attracts psychopaths. I work with physicians and even they hate surgeons! (Obviously I'm generalising, not all surgeons)

I love this advice. Going to tell my daughter and all her friends.

I was so so relieved when she kicked him out. On top of everything else he was an alcoholic - it’s a miracle no one was injured when he worked on the labour wards.

This in spades. He’s horrible.

400 is high and you are clearly unwell- Some medical professionals (being one myself) see such terrible things that they become desensitised, it may be that rather than he doesn’t care. I am actually on the opposite side, I over react to everything because I know bad things do happen and can come out of nowhere. Hope you feel better soon.

I'd be tempted to only say 'as you say, it's nothing' if he asks after you then block him. If he is that dismissive I'd be very petty.

I'm suprised he hasn't tried to add in 'mine is higher than that' yet. I don't buy into :the way I show love is by dismissing others fears"..

Ask him why he dismissed you, put it out in the light else it might keep happening...

The man is a fool. A CRP of 400 is really high and as a doctor I am surprised he is acting like it doesn’t warrant an investigation and immediate diagnosis. Honestly you deserve better! LTB!

could you elaborate as I have recently had a few dates with one

I think you could be right, my gp said the same about her own children and thought I was worrying too much about mine

I expect he’s trying to save face for not recognising how unwell you are.

He’s a dick.

Hope you’re better soon OP.

He’s a surgeon. They are a different breed.

I hope you feel better soon and are being treated well by a decent Dr. He should be embarrassed he wasn’t even able to notice the markers. Lucky you ignored him and took yourself to hospital. I hope I never has the misfortune of being his patient! When you are feeling better I hope you review this relationship and find someone that is caring (and not shit at his job!)

I also have a lot of medics in my family - while it’s true that there won’t be a huge outpouring of sympathy in response to health issues, they will still take the time to listen and advise properly.

I don’t think they are all that level unsympathetic to family members. He sounds controlling and abusive.

WTH?? That’s awful!

She was totally right - a friend of mine used to be an orthopaedic surgeon (gave it up in his 40s to teach as he hated medicine) and he has told me some tales... I'd also add pilots to that list.

Considering you've only been together 2 years I think you should be seriously considering your future. You won't always be healthy or manage to avoid accidents such as a car crash and one day you could become bedbound for several weeks or months. Would he care for you? Provide food or a glass of water, help you to the toilet or give you a wash? I would say he would not. So how would you survive OP? Think carefully.

This. My friend was married to a gynaecologist and gave birth at the hospital he worked at. He obviously wasn’t allowed to be ‘her doctor’ - he was there as her partner, but knew all the staff who were on shift. He told them to only give her paracetamol - apparently she didn’t need any other pain relief.

And paracetamol was all she got. She was in labour for three days.

We were all amazed* to find out two years later that he was shagging one of the nurses who’d attended the birth.

*not amazed at all.

PS - unsurprisingly my friend later had PND. When her own GP prescribed antidepressants, her husband told her she was ‘pathetic’.

I hope one day he wraps his stupid Porsche round a tree.

I've got to be honest I would be considering letting his place of work know. I think a surgeon downplaying a CRP of 400 is terrifying.

I'm now imagining that he's a terrible surgeon with the highest sepsis rates in the country, gaslighting all his patients. I hope the OP comes here to out him when there's a national scandal about it!

he is quite full of himself when anything medical comes up

Well you can certainly put a stop to that right now, can’t you? I’d be inclined to tell him that he might be good at following the ‘cut here’ instructions of a consultant, but he’s clearly not as good as he thinks he is at basic diagnoses, so you don’t want to hear it from him anymore because if you’d listened to him, you could have had life threatening consequences.

Or, you could tell him that in addition to his ill informed opinion, you don’t appreciate his lack of care for you and you don’t think it’s indicative of a couple who’ll be spending their futures together.

Medics are notoriously unsympathetic to their own families about illness. To be fair they’ve probably had to work whilst being ill, themselves.

Of course he’s seen worse! It would be weird if he hadn’t. But it’s not a competition. He’d better hope that he doesn’t get ill and need you to look after him.

YANBU a CRP of 400 is very high and definitely needs to be treated urgently.
YABU to expect empathy from a surgeon - never met one with an ounce of bedside manner
Hope you’re feeling better soon - but run he’s not going to get better.

I mean she’s not wrong