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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Aibu - dont want to clean up diarrhea.

153 replies

Sugargliderwombat · 18/06/2026 11:24

I am absolutely LIVID my disgusting partner has caught our children's stomach bug and so far this morning i have found:

Diarrhea around the toilet bowl and underside of toilet seat.

Shitty pants on the floor of the bathroom (same distance from toilet as the bin).

Shit stains in the bed.

He has gone to work. Yes, I know.

My aibu is that unless bedbound you are NEVER too ill to clean up your own shit. I have never, ever been too ill.

To avoid a dripfeed YES he has done this before. Vomited all over toilet seat and floor and said was too ill to clean it up. Again I was furious. If you got out of bed to vomit you can quickly spray and wipe it.

OP posts:
Nannamads · 18/06/2026 15:39

YANBU. I would leave it there for him to clean when he gets back from work. I would say that it is highly infectious and that you are not cleaning it up. I cannot believe he has gone to work. His colleagues will probably come down with it now, what a selfish git he is.

BauhausOfEliott · 18/06/2026 15:34

He left pants full of shit on the floor and shat in the bed and then went to work?!

That’s absolutely fucking repulsive. Dirty selfish cunt.

NoisyMonster678 · 18/06/2026 15:33

He's a sewer rat up a drainpipe.

LlynTegid · 18/06/2026 15:26

I would have supported you contacting his work to say he is ill, so he should be sent home. He is failing in basic requirements of the Health and Safety at Work Act if there is any possibility of his germs being spread.

Specialneedsnightmare · 18/06/2026 15:03

I couldn't stay with a partner who shat in the bed and left it. I really couldn't.

ByQuaintAzureWasp · 18/06/2026 15:02

Nah, leave it for him to clean when he gets home. He does it because you respond inappropriately.

TreadSoftlyOnMyDreams · 18/06/2026 15:00

Wow but your bar is low.

WearyAuldWumman · 18/06/2026 14:59

YANBU

I only cleaned up after my late husband after he had a major stroke...and even then, the poor soul apologised profusely.

paradisecircus · 18/06/2026 14:57

Does he disgust you in other ways too? It sounds like you have grounds for reconsidering the relationship.

Pistachiocake · 18/06/2026 14:56

IF it's a bit and he was going to clean it up later, but was forcing himself into work..well it's still not great.
But should he even be going to work in this state?

PotatoLove · 18/06/2026 14:55

What a dirty soapy bastard!

PotatoLove · 18/06/2026 14:54

What a dirty soapy bastard!

Lifeomars · 18/06/2026 14:42

Bet the filthy pig didn't clean himself properly either before he set out to spread his germs at work

omghereistrouble · 18/06/2026 14:38

i bet his work mates are thrilled at him spreading his stomach bug.
my partner who is going blind and struggles still manages to clear up to the best of his ability I often just have a quick mop round only as I am fussy but it is okay. If he needed to he would put everything in the washer or put his pants in the outside bin so i would not have to deal with them

Happyjoe · 18/06/2026 14:34

He went to work. He can clean up.
Couldn't live with this.

Topseyt123 · 18/06/2026 14:33

Sugargliderwombat · 18/06/2026 12:32

Well you predicted it. He's come home and yep, bleating about sympathy and me being so unkind because he's so SO unwell.

Raging.

I am stuck here today as 1 of 2 kids still have diarrhea and I'm not enough of a selfish dick to go out.

Show quote history

How come this filthy specimen is still your partner? I'd be flinging him out of the door, along with his shitty underwear and sheets.

He's utterly disgusting and doesn't respect you or your kids (are they also his?) at all. Get rid.

PinkyFlamingo · 18/06/2026 14:23

Well you are choosing to stay with him, he doesn't really care how angry you get as he knows you will clean it up.

Notgonnalieaboutthis · 18/06/2026 14:18

But what are you actually going to do about it apart from writing about the disgusting details here????

chocoluv · 18/06/2026 14:12

I judge you both.

Him for doing it and you for staying.

I bet he wouldn’t do it if some beautiful, young woman was staying at yours for the week.

Besidemyselfwithworry · 18/06/2026 14:05

Sugargliderwombat · 18/06/2026 11:24

I am absolutely LIVID my disgusting partner has caught our children's stomach bug and so far this morning i have found:

Diarrhea around the toilet bowl and underside of toilet seat.

Shitty pants on the floor of the bathroom (same distance from toilet as the bin).

Shit stains in the bed.

He has gone to work. Yes, I know.

My aibu is that unless bedbound you are NEVER too ill to clean up your own shit. I have never, ever been too ill.

To avoid a dripfeed YES he has done this before. Vomited all over toilet seat and floor and said was too ill to clean it up. Again I was furious. If you got out of bed to vomit you can quickly spray and wipe it.

It is digusting I agree

HOWEVER you said he’s done it before! My question @Sugargliderwombat is why you are putting up with this gross behaviour

my advice is get cleaned up and then pack his bags - why would you want to be with someone like this it’s absolutely 🤮

sesquipedalian · 18/06/2026 14:05

Your post actually made me shudder, OP. Do you have a spare bedroom? If so, I’d be decamping there and leaving him to sort out the sheets. I’d be very cross if this were a teenager: from a grown man, it’s beyond unacceptable. If he was well enough to go to work, he was certainly well enough to clear up after himself. Hell, if he was so ill he had to stay at home, he could still have rinsed his pants out or thrown them away. Truly beyond unreasonable behaviour, OP.

Laura95167 · 18/06/2026 14:04

If hes well enough to work hes well enough to clean. Thats it.

Bet he wouldnt clean your shit

Coconutter24 · 18/06/2026 14:04

Did you clean it?

Anyahyacinth · 18/06/2026 14:04

Shame the children are ill or else I would have said book a hotel and leave him to his mess

SadTimesInFife · 18/06/2026 14:02

MrsMoastyToasty · 18/06/2026 11:39

They are going to rip him a new arse hole if he makes that type of mess at work.

But then there'd be twice as much diarrhoea sprayed 🙄

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