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AIBU?

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Original poster

To say no to ds getting a perm?

66 replies

Jellycat1313 · 15/06/2026 16:55

Ds is 11yo and a lot of his friends have had perms.

He has said that he would like the same. I had a look into it and I read that, as I suspected, it’s not a good idea for young children due to the chemicals and it can permanently damage the hair.

He is ok about it but still saying that his friends have got it done.

Is it a bit off to say no? Most of the friends have perfectly sensible parents and they have allowed it.

Yanbu - he shouldn’t be allowed
Yabu - perms are fine for children

OP posts:
astrozenica · 15/06/2026 17:13

CurlewKate · 15/06/2026 17:09

Why would the chemicals harm his scalp?

Show quote history

I'm not an expert but I've read that the chemicals used in straightening/perming products for Afro hair can be hazardous to health.

EvangelicalAboutButteredToast · 15/06/2026 17:11

CokeinBottles · 15/06/2026 16:56

It's a no from me. Expensive, damages hair, looks shit.

That covers it! I think it’s fading as a fashion now anyway.

OrdinaryGirl · 15/06/2026 17:09

This might be a case of picking your battles OP. If you say yes, you’re building collateral for the future, that you aren’t an unreasonable parent who doesn’t let him do anything. It’s a looooong game 😏

Original poster
Jellycat1313 · 15/06/2026 17:09

astrozenica · 15/06/2026 17:06

Does a perm mean wavy or straightened hair in this context?
I personally think 12 is too young and the chemicals could harm his scalp.

Curly perm.

OP posts:
CurlewKate · 15/06/2026 17:09

astrozenica · 15/06/2026 17:06

Does a perm mean wavy or straightened hair in this context?
I personally think 12 is too young and the chemicals could harm his scalp.

Why would the chemicals harm his scalp?

Original poster
Jellycat1313 · 15/06/2026 17:09

MyArtfulGreySloth · 15/06/2026 17:06

Is the broccoli style still in? It’s awful. Say no.

Yes, that’s the one, they all look like my late nan 🤣

He’s got the most beautiful floppy blonde mop of hair anyway, in the Summer he looks like a cool
little surfer with sun-kissed hair.

OP posts:
KateSixer · 15/06/2026 17:09

Madness.

ShetlandishMum · 15/06/2026 17:08

Of course it would be a no.

IllBurnThatBridgeWhenIGetToIt · 15/06/2026 17:07

It might not even hold in his hair at that age. I would consult with a hairdresser first.

If they say his hair is OK I would let him have it. Having a crappy hairdo at your own insistence is practically a rite of passage.

astrozenica · 15/06/2026 17:06

Does a perm mean wavy or straightened hair in this context?
I personally think 12 is too young and the chemicals could harm his scalp.

MyArtfulGreySloth · 15/06/2026 17:06

Is the broccoli style still in? It’s awful. Say no.

Original poster
Jellycat1313 · 15/06/2026 17:04

Ablondiebutagoody · 15/06/2026 17:03

Like a 1980's Kevin Keegan? Hell yes, let him do it

I had to google that but that’s definitely NOT the look he is going for 🤣

OP posts:
IglesiasPiggl · 15/06/2026 17:04

My DS got a perm as a 12 year old because it was the fashion. I let him, it looked awful but he and his friends with similar thought it was cool 😂. Anyway, they all moved on, it was fun, none of them got another one!

Ablondiebutagoody · 15/06/2026 17:03

Like a 1980's Kevin Keegan? Hell yes, let him do it

UserNineNine · 15/06/2026 17:01

I wouldn’t care about his hair being damaged. It’s hair, you just grow more hair.

Having said that, I have no idea whether a perm has other health risks.

And I wouldn’t care if it looks shit either! Eleven year olds and grown ups have different ideas of what they want to look like. He mustn’t think it looks shit.

Maybe he can get curls in other ways, like rag rolling it.

CokeinBottles · 15/06/2026 16:56

It's a no from me. Expensive, damages hair, looks shit.

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