I’ve been accused of stealing £20

Once you know for sure that you'll automatically get the blame it's time to bin.

When they ask you to babysit again, tell them you don't appreciate being accused of stealing and it's probably better they find another babysitter.

Unless they bring it up again, I wouldn’t say anything else about it. If they ask you to babysit again, “of course you would love to help, but I’m busy rearranging my wardrobe/washing my hair/grooming the cat/going out/babysitting for someone else and getting £20 and a takeaway.” Pick whichever lame excuse you want, but I wouldn’t babysit for them again, cos someone is light fingered, if it’s not you, it could even be your family member and not the friend.

Yeah, exactly this - they could have asked in a less accusatory manner! But frankly, I think it's pretty rude of them not to have blooming well left you money for a takeaway while you were there for all that time! Even if I thought you'd taken it to pay for a takeaway, I'd be more mortified that I hadn't paid for it in the first place!

I used to clean an office they were MESSY my orders were to clean around it so I did for months then they misplaced a passport accused me of taking it obviously I didn't so I said I wouldn't clean it again I had the supervisor in on my last shift who was appalled at the mess and I left they have struggled to find someone to take it on full time most are dipping after the first week apparently they found the passport not in the office never apologised

If they wouldn't care if OP had used the cash, they could have said something like:

“You gave £100 to X’s mum yesterday, we’ve counted this morning and there’s only £80 there. Did you use it for your takeaway? No problem at all if you did, we're just trying to find out what happened to the missing £20.”

They've cut off their noses to spite their faces as OP certainly won't be babysitting for them in future.

You've basically been accused of stealing £20. You don't get paid for babysitting. WTAF are you THINKING about?
Next time they ask, tell them you
a) want an apology and b) charge the going rate for babysitting in future.

Or tell them to 'go forth and multiply', which would be my choice.

I hope you have told them their free babysitting service is no longer available OP 😂

I can’t believe the cheek of them!

Yes, asking if OP used it for a takeaway is accusing her. Otherwise they would not have asked. The fact they let her do a 13 hour babysitting shift for a toddler and 5 year old, and did not offer to cover the cost of the takeaway at least, is astounding. I can’t get over the entitlement.

Lots of things could have happend to it - given that you babaysat for free and have offered proof you paid for your own takeaway - ( they could have offered that to you ) - and they flet ablt to accuse you - I would never babysit for them again.

Not to be nasty of to take offense but to protect yourself - they will clearly wonder if anything went missing in the future.

I have family who've done similar making 2+2= 5 and even with proof being very relucant to stop thinking that way and often forgetting the proof over the years but remembering the accusation.

It's very clear from the OP's posts there were 2 children, the 5 year old who went out for a bit with the lift giving mum who took the money, and the 2 year old who stayed behind with OP. Why on earth should she have to hand over the money to the parents (at 1 in the morning when they returned), when she has left it exactly where they left it?

I mean, I think I'd be saying to the family: "You're not accusing me of stealing, right?"

I wonder if they're the sort that would also get angry OP hadn't counted the money when it was returned and blame her if the £20 was missing.

Perhaps someone has suggested this above but I'd be SO upset if this exact scenario had happened to me and I'd definitely be messaging the family member to say that X&Y were so well behaved as usual but you looked after them out of kindness for hours, bought your own meal, dealt with the other parent only to be accused of taking some of the money they left! You would never do that and won't be sitting again if that's how they think of you.

Converse happened to us years ago where a young family member did take some money from a pile a friend had left on the side. The friend chose not to mention it and handled it amazingly when the child tearfully confessed the next summer and gave the equivalent back. Such a lesson was learned by all from the way this friend handled it with zero accusations, even though he probably did think one of the other adults had used it.

They absolutely can. We can’t leave anything a round as it becomes my 5 year olds treasure!

“Did you take some of my money?” constitutes an accusation.

As well as not paying you, did they not provide food for you while you were babysitting?

You babysat for 13 hours and then got asked whether you took £20. I would never babysit again.

What family member? Your mums sister? Dad's sister? They should advocate for you.

So, so rude for them to not provide food for you when you were working a literal 10 hour shift!

They will lose a lot more than £20 if they lose their free babysitter! I’m horrified that they didn’t sort out dinner for you or leave you money for a takeaway anyway. If my sister babysits I do that and leave her treats.

This! Never again. And unless they are family or friends that you have a baby sitting circle with, don't sit for free. Good thing you paid by card. I hope they are embarrassed.

That’s different though, isn’t it.

So you were kind enough to babysit two young kids for free and the cheeky fuckers accused you of stealing £20!

Tell them to get lost absolute arseholes!

She hasnt said they responded in fact she said after she replied ‘they went quiet’ so I’d assume she sent it as proof along with her answer. But it wasn’t asked for.

exactly.

They just wanted to be sure before then asking their kids.

The Op appears to have taken this as a gross accusation.

I do lots of childcare for my DGC . Wouldn’t dream of taking money but would be seriously pissed off if there was nothing for me to eat !!

sounds a good excuse to say no to any further requests though