I’m not going to daughters prom

Never heard of parents being involved with proms.

Why is almost everyone missing the point of the OP?

My DS would have been mortified if I turned up at his prom. Weird.

take a photo before she leaves.

As said upthread, the parents don’t ‘go to’ the prom. They spend an hour watching everyone arrive outside the venue. Then when prom starts and the kids are allowed inside the venue, parents go home - they’re not inside hanging out with their kids for the next 5 hours.

This. ^ Never heard anything like it? Since when did parents and grandparents go to their childrens/grandchildrens prom?! Is this an American tradition? Never heard of it.

Football stadium in the Midlands, the prom itself is held in one of the function rooms

Eye opening thread. Where I live parents ( plus sometimes extended family, siblings etc) always gather outside venue to mingle, watch them arrive and take photos. Kids disappear inside, we leave, end of. Three high schools locally all do the same thing. Been this way for decades it’s nothing new. Honestly never knew it was a parent free zone.

Gosh I've not heard about this tradition of parents dropping kids at prom and hanging around. My DC probably wouldn't want to be dropped off by me in our old banger, especially if some others are in limos! 😅

Does your daughter actually want her GP’s there, or would she prefer you?

Wow, a stadium?!? Where is this?!?

We're in London and not heard anything this grand happening at any of the indy or state schools in North London (at least not the ones I know).

That must be new Not something that happened at my kids schools

This, do what you want @omgwhys just don’t be dramatic martyr and ruin her prom

I'm not going to my daughter's prom 🤷‍♀️ I have a work event that day so she's going to her friends' house to get ready and they will go get their hair done and go to the prom together

It’s interesting how different schools do it. Here it’s a big event. Held at a stadium, around 500 kids in the year, lots of money spent on tickets, dresses, suits, hair, transport. School actively encourages parents to see the kids arriving, even those living nearby who don’t have kids at the school will rock up for a look at the procession.
Sixth form prom is more low key but parents are still aware where it is and when as they’re the ones paying on the school payment system and getting email updates.

I think this is properly sad. A big night to celebrate with friends and not only do your parents hang around, but your grandparents?!

Families really need to let these young adults live a little.

My question is why are the GPs going? Is it because they have a relationship with her and she wants them there?

If the answer to the above is yes, I would keep my distance but go. My parents are divorced and it got really messy. If you mention each others names in their vicinity you can feel the daggers in the air. My mum didn’t come to my wedding as I refused to take any particular side. But it cut me deeply that she couldn’t put her feelings aside and focus on this being my day.

Now I know that posters will say wedding is different to prom, but in a 16 year old’s life the prom is the biggest deal going right now.

All mine had photos taken at home before they left for prom and posh transport with their friends. Quite honestly I've never heard of parents going to prom not grandparents. I find it very odd. It's your DD day not yours or grandparents day.

Jeeze, it’s like an episode of Amandaland!

Clearly vastly different depending on the area. Where we are kids get to the Prom on public transport and it's all very low key and generally a bit naff. I may have taken a quick snap of him in is suit but that's it.

He has the 6th form Prom coming up I've not heard of any big plans, I don't know where it is even!

Same at my DC's school.
Photos and wave them off, chauffeur drives slowly so you can get there first and see them arrive
More Photos with their mates
Parents leave
Some parents go back to ferry them to after party
Other parents pick up from after party and drop everyone home

It’s an American thing that has now taken off over here. My kids school have been doing it for at least 12 years, it’s a huge thing within the community. I just had a leaving assembly when I left school 30 years ago! It was certainly a lot cheaper….

@ApoposReally?. I've lived here (WA) for nealy 20 yrs & 3 of my kids have had their prom. I've never been aware of parents going to prom. Maybe they just don't do it in my area

The whole prom thing is fascinating. Did it come from social media? 30 years ago we had an end of year party but it was just that, a celebratory party. We didn’t call it a prom and it was organised completely by the students, nothing to do with school. It was basically just a birthday party without a birthday person. I’m curious how these things are now traditions when they didn’t exist a generation before.

OP- I’d go. She’s your DD and I wouldn’t miss out on the experience. Just ignore them and enjoy the moment.

I was so busy gawping at a stretch limousine that I didn't even notice my son and his girlfriend arrive in their car - they were just behind it.
You have more special moments when they first put on their clothes and pose. Arriving at the Prom, everything happens so quick, out of the car, quick pose for the official picture then they disappear.

Exactly this. It’s not ‘muscling in’ on their kids proms as some posters seem to think. You stand behind barriers, watch everyone arriving, maybe take photos of your kids with others that they weren’t getting ready with if they ask you to, chat to other parents and teachers. It’s a huge thing in my kids school, and yes, they absolutely want their parents or other family members there. Then, when prom officially starts, ie the kids are allowed inside the venue, parents leave. They aren’t in there loading up at the buffet 🙄