Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU to dress up to match my son for his prom?

920 replies

MissRaspberryRipples · 13/06/2026 14:39

Hi there. My son has his high school prom coming up next month as he's 16 and doing his GCSEs at the moment. He's chosen his outfit choices and I've purchased both suits that he liked so he has a choice. He's gone for purple suits which are lovely. I've also purchased myself a lovely purple dress and some nice shoes so that he can have some lovely mum and son photos taken on his special night. I showed them to my partner and all he has said is that they're nice and will look great but why am I making such an effort when it's not even my night? He says it's silly and isn't necessary. He thinks I'm overdoing it on the effort for a night that isn't for me. Is it really unreasonable to want to make the effort or is he just being unnecessarily mean

OP posts:
Thread gallery
11
Jamesblonde2 · 13/06/2026 17:37

It’s cringe. You take some snaps, see him off at tea time then you go home and put your slippers on. What on earth are you thinking? Stop embarrassing your boy.

Lovelyview · 13/06/2026 17:35

We (dh & I) took a selfie with my son when we dropped him off for his prom but we were just wearing ordinary 'nice' clothes. If the dress is something you would wear for a summer night out (not weddingy) then it's not that weird to want to look nice, and I think it's fine to have a photo with your son. Maybe take a photo before going and then see what his friends and other parents are doing at the event. I seem to remember lots of photos with family as well as with friend groups.

Sweetstreams · 13/06/2026 17:35

I think it could be nice to have family photos in the garden or something but once he leaves the house I wouldn’t want to be matching. Most prom photos family are in normal clothes that I have seen.

UserNineNine · 13/06/2026 17:32

I’ve got an amazing photo of my dd2 just before she left for prom with her older sister in her tracksuit bottoms and dinosaur slippers. They are both laughing as it was quite funny. Dd1 didn’t even get a prom because of Covid but it didn’t cross my mind that we should dress up for photos with her. The photo we have is great because it was so natural.

It’s the child’s night, not anyone else’s. It’s a time for them to be with their friends.

Beenwhereyouareagain · 13/06/2026 17:31

outerspacepotato · 13/06/2026 14:41

Oh honey, no.

This.
Please, please don't.

Badab1ng · 13/06/2026 17:31

Very weird.

AgnesMcDoo · 13/06/2026 17:27

That’s really weird. It’s his night. Leave him alone. My son would be mortified if I did that to him.

LiquoriceAllsorts2 · 13/06/2026 17:26

Fine to have photos together but not in matching clothes. Just wear a nice summer dress or trousers and top

ReadingSoManyThreads · 13/06/2026 17:26

I can just see the OP wearing a white bridal gown to his wedding too and elbowing the actual bride out of the way for the romantic pictures 😂

LiquoriceAllsorts2 · 13/06/2026 17:25

It’s his prom not yours, do not do this!

ReadingSoManyThreads · 13/06/2026 17:25

Another one whose midwife forgot to cut the umbilical cord...

ERthree · 13/06/2026 17:19

Oh behave. Another mother that just can't let her child be. It screams of being sad and desperate. You are his mother not his girlfriend or his bride.

Meadowfinch · 13/06/2026 17:18

If I'd done that, my ds would have died of embarrassment.

At my ds' prom, parents were allowed to drop off their teen, have one drink and to stay until 8pm, then were required to GO AWAY and not return until 1am or when called

MissRaspberryRipples · 13/06/2026 17:14

FaceIt · 13/06/2026 16:57

It’s absolutely fine.
I hope the photos are lovely.

I did vote you are being unreasonable, but now I’ve seen your updates it puts a really nice and different perspective on it 💐

Thankyou, I'm definitely not out to follow my kid to his prom nor am I plastering photos all over social media. I don't really post a fat lot on Facebook as it is cos quite honestly I don't need to. If I want to share photos with family I have WhatsApp for that so that people who aren't bothered don't have to see stuff all over Facebook. I get people have a difference of opinion but is it really necessary for them to be so nasty and cruel about it. His prom isn't fancy dress he chose to wear purple and he picked out his own suits. He chose two as one of the jackets he chose came in a different material to what he thought it was(it's like a velvet type material which in the middle of July may be a bit warm for it so has a suit jacket also if he wants something cooler to wear than the velvet one).

OP posts:
Charmatt · 13/06/2026 17:12

OP, you have a clear case of uncut apron strings.
Any future girlfriends will see that photograph and know you will never let him go.
Get saving for his wedding day, where you can upstage the bride to make it clear you won't ever let him go.
...I feel embarrassed for you!

LookInsideMySpottyBag · 13/06/2026 17:09

No

No Way Reaction GIF
Onmytod24 · 13/06/2026 17:05

If you’ve read all the posts and you still can’t see how ridiculous your idea is and how it’s just not helpful to your son, whatever he says. Then I’m very sorry, but I do hope you’ll change your mind.

LBFseBrom · 13/06/2026 17:04

No harm in it but seems a bit silly, you aren't going to the prom.

JustSawJohnny · 13/06/2026 17:03

OP, you came here to ask a question.

Your question has been answered.

The overwhelming majority of people here agree with your DH.

It was a lovely thought but even those need a bit of consideration.

There is absolutely no need to be defensive. If people are being, in your opinion, a bit rude in their responses that is their problem but maybe you need to have a think about why they are shocked enough by your behaviour to come at you so strongly?

It is VERY unusual for parents to buy outfits for a couple of photos before their child's prom.

There's probably a reason for that!

You came for feedback. You got it.

Itsasecretnow · 13/06/2026 16:59

I usually hate MN ads, but this one, after just the second reply, has to be the best placed one I’ve ever seen on here 😂

AIBU to dress up to match my son for his prom?
ItIsGreen · 13/06/2026 16:59

Eeeew
Get therapy for yourself before he has a serious relationship

FaceIt · 13/06/2026 16:57

It’s absolutely fine.
I hope the photos are lovely.

I did vote you are being unreasonable, but now I’ve seen your updates it puts a really nice and different perspective on it 💐

category12 · 13/06/2026 16:56

It's weird and creepy.

He should co-ordinate with his date if he has one, not his mum.

If you missed out on your own prom or something and are trying to live vicariously through him, stop! Arrange a school reunion or a big birthday party for yourself, so you can dress up and feel the attention.

Hillarious · 13/06/2026 16:55

MissRaspberryRipples · 13/06/2026 16:22

Yes he saw the dress and he's ok with it, after all it's only making an effort for a photo. He's taking himself to prom with his friends I'm not taking him there. And it's not being plastered all over Facebook either if anything his photos will be shared with family like aunts and uncles

This is the big shame, @MissRaspberryRipples, that you won’t see your son or his friends arriving at the prom. My kids’ proms were all hosted by the school and their teachers, and parents gathered to see everyone arrive on foot, by bike, in fancy cars or other vehicles. Kids dressed up, parents dressed down. The proms were good, but it was the after prom party that mattered most. Certainly no matching outfits there!

Fatiguedwithlife · 13/06/2026 16:55

Just another saying Dear God, No. Don’t do it