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AIBU?

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Original poster

AIBU to dress up to match my son for his prom?

920 replies

MissRaspberryRipples · 13/06/2026 14:39

Hi there. My son has his high school prom coming up next month as he's 16 and doing his GCSEs at the moment. He's chosen his outfit choices and I've purchased both suits that he liked so he has a choice. He's gone for purple suits which are lovely. I've also purchased myself a lovely purple dress and some nice shoes so that he can have some lovely mum and son photos taken on his special night. I showed them to my partner and all he has said is that they're nice and will look great but why am I making such an effort when it's not even my night? He says it's silly and isn't necessary. He thinks I'm overdoing it on the effort for a night that isn't for me. Is it really unreasonable to want to make the effort or is he just being unnecessarily mean

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Isittimeformynapyet · 14/06/2026 00:13

MissRaspberryRipples · 13/06/2026 18:35

I'm sorry but there's a difference in having an opinion and being downright mean..especially about his choice of suit and trying to say people will take the piss out of it. He's a 16year old boy FFS. Lots of friends and family love him for the fact that he is an individual rather than a sheep following what everyone else does

I totally agree with you OP. It's great that your son is an individual and has his own style.

Now back to the point of the thread: this fancy frock of yours. It's just not a dignified thing to do!

But I suspect you know that, don't you.

mummydoris2006 · 14/06/2026 00:12

Isittimeformynapyet · 13/06/2026 23:58

Since 2023 I've had two big bereavements and my partner has cancer. I still don't want to be ostentatious and I still shop in the chazzers. Your woes are irrelevant - you'd have done all that anyway.

I'm very cool 😎 You'd hate me.

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ODFOD and take your faux coolness with you, it's not a race to the bottom ffs amd I wasn't trying to justify, I have nonneed too🤦🏻‍♀️.

I don't deny in any way that I would have paid that money regardless, 2022 could have been our best year yet and she'd still have worn a red carpet ready dress.

I can't see it's ostentatious to wear a dress the OP has clearly said she would wear again that happens to compliment her son. As always on here lately though it's the sack cloth and ashes brigade that have the biggest opinions.

@MissRaspberryRipples I hope you bloody rock your dress!

windysocks · 14/06/2026 00:10

It’s weird

Cherrytree86 · 14/06/2026 00:01

Could you not wear some nice jeans from Per Una M&S and a nice top with a nice waterfall cardigan from M&S or Peacocks in case it’s cold? Footwear wise…something sensible and comfortable like Sketchers? Or something similar?

Isittimeformynapyet · 13/06/2026 23:58

mummydoris2006 · 13/06/2026 18:08

@MissRaspberryRipples my DD20 had her prom in 2022. We went all out, school hadn't been easy, we'd had a horrible year involving nearly losing my DH, we lost MIL and DD herself was in an accident.
I went against the whole of mumsnet, who's children are apparently so cool they'll only wear charity shop prom dresses or a bargain dress that cost a tenner! Prom cost us a fortune and I don't regret one single penny at all.
I got changed into a dress when I got home for pictures. It wasn't anything particularly special but I made sure it wouldn't clash with her dress. My DH (her DF) had pics in workwear and my parents wore nice smart casual outfits. One of her friends who is 8 years older than her turned up for photos and had made an effort too.
Wear the dress, have the pics and I hope you cherish them, I know I do 4 years later. I love them all, my DH in workwear ones too.

Since 2023 I've had two big bereavements and my partner has cancer. I still don't want to be ostentatious and I still shop in the chazzers. Your woes are irrelevant - you'd have done all that anyway.

I'm very cool 😎 You'd hate me.

Dragonflyspeeding · 13/06/2026 23:57

Kate and George match when doing public outings so maybe its a thing.

It doesn't matter what other people think about it OP. The only person you should ask is your son.

Sometimeswinning · 13/06/2026 23:57

Lambsear · 13/06/2026 23:55

Did he choose the purple suits? Or have you chosen them - you mention you like purple as a colour. Has he had a say in it? Is purple a colour a 16yr old boy would wear to his prom? It just sounds odd.

I know. Imagine an individual 16 yer old thinking differently to you! Odd!

FontSnob · 13/06/2026 23:56

Charlie554 · 13/06/2026 20:11

jesus fucking shit. Do you want him to the Y11 laughing stock?

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But no one is going to see. They’re in their garden at home and she’s not sticking them on social media. What on earth is wrong with that?

Lambsear · 13/06/2026 23:55

Did he choose the purple suits? Or have you chosen them - you mention you like purple as a colour. Has he had a say in it? Is purple a colour a 16yr old boy would wear to his prom? It just sounds odd.

Youhadrambledonfor18pages · 13/06/2026 23:46

MissRaspberryRipples · 13/06/2026 15:42

Like I'm not fussed whether or not he has a girlfriend to be quite honest I'm not that nosey and intrusive. But for the other poster to say it's telling that he doesn't because I'll fuck up his relationships is pretty ridiculous. I asked for opinions considering what my partner said and wanted to know if anyone else thought he was being unnecessarily mean about it. Clearly a few agree with him.

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“I asked for opinions considering what my partner said and wanted to know if anyone else thought he was being unnecessarily mean about it. Clearly a few the majority agree with him.”

fixed it for you.

BrokenWingsCantFly · 13/06/2026 23:44

So parents ain't even going to the prom, you are just dressing up to match to take photos in your home?

Yeah, very weird, no need just take a photo if him. Ao strange to buy a dress to match just for the photo. Let him have his moment, this is nothing to do with you and your need to play dress up to have a photo of you looking lovely. It is very strange and no other parent will be doing this

BelieveInCher · 13/06/2026 23:38

That is so creepy OP. He’s your son, not your date. It’s not your prom, you’re a grown woman.

Youhadrambledonfor18pages · 13/06/2026 23:38

WTF my 16yo son would die of embarrassment if I did this (and we have a v close relationship).

Yabu, big time. It’s not about you!

WheresThatCatGoneNow · 13/06/2026 23:27

This sounds like an episode of Amandaland.

Pinkissmart · 13/06/2026 23:18

Oh hell no.
Super weird.

Sayswho546 · 13/06/2026 23:16

well if you want to be on that tv series I love a mamas boy YANBU, jokes aside it is weird.

So strange that it was something you thought of…

PixieTales · 13/06/2026 22:54

NotAnotherScarf · 13/06/2026 22:50

It's you who commented re his lack of date. It's you who wants to dress up for a photo. It's you who's wasted money buying 2suits irrespective of cost. It's you. You. You....im guessing as someone who was once a 16 year old boy that he's agreed to things to keep you happy and you are making this about you...otherwise why would you post on here.

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Yeah and he’s 16 not 6!

Why are you trying to suppress him? 16 year old lads are full of testosterone and very much so interested as in women (or guys) but the point is they are sexually active.

The way you speak about your teenage son is cringe. Overbearing boy mum to the max.

Mumtobabyhavoc · 13/06/2026 22:51

Definitely dress up for family pics, but matching is a bit OTT.

GIF by Cartoon Hangover
NotAnotherScarf · 13/06/2026 22:50

MissRaspberryRipples · 13/06/2026 15:28

Jesus he's 16 not 21. Why is it seen as unusual for a 16year old lad to not yet be bothered about having a girlfriend? It doesn't mean anything if he doesn't or do you really think that every single teenager defines themselves with a relationship status? I mean that's quite shallow to think that your kids simply must have a partner at 16 and if they don't it simply HAS to be because their parent will fuck it up. I have two adult daughters who have partners and live independently it's not like I lock them up and force them to only love mummy Jesus Christ your comment is ridiculous

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It's you who commented re his lack of date. It's you who wants to dress up for a photo. It's you who's wasted money buying 2suits irrespective of cost. It's you. You. You....im guessing as someone who was once a 16 year old boy that he's agreed to things to keep you happy and you are making this about you...otherwise why would you post on here.

oliviaAustin · 13/06/2026 22:47

That’s weird. You’re his mum not his date…

AngelaBB · 13/06/2026 22:47

Please, please don’t do this.

HostaCentral · 13/06/2026 22:47

Edenmum2 · 13/06/2026 22:37

They’re not wearing matching outfits, they are just both wearing purple. It’s not like Christmas pyjamas or something. Every child I know that has had a prom have taken pictures with their family beforehand. I am so baffled as to why people think it’s weird. She’s not even going to the prom or sharing pics on socials.

These responses calling her a creep, weirdo, incestuous, future mil from hell etc are quite honestly disgusting.

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This must be some sort of new hell. I have never known anyone take photos of themselves with their kids on prom or leavers. Weird.

allthingsinmoderation · 13/06/2026 22:43

Absolutely no!

Luvtheinlaws · 13/06/2026 22:38

Sorry, but this is extremely OTT

Sometimeswinning · 13/06/2026 22:38

I wouldn’t care about the cringe. You’re not famous, not posting it. How many quirky, cute photos do we get in life?

Your first mistake was asking here. 90% seem to be scared of their kids. My son would roll his eyes but he’d do it. Just like in life he’s been an absolute idiot and I’ve rolled my eyes and got on with it.

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