Told someone I was pregnant today…

Wow

Hilarious. Did you get on?

You may be writing about me.

S is that you?! 🤣

Tell you why I asked that question though...

It was a joyful surprise (to me) and my initial WOW made me consciously think about my words thanks to a previous experience - because I once said "oh what a lovely surprise!" (Surprise to me) and was told off for being offensive as they'd been trying for years. So it just came out randomly as "ahh such lovely news. was it planned?"

Sad world really, when you can't just be happy or honest but be afraid of offending people.

I might just say "well done" in future lol 🙈

I found comments towards my pregnancies the weirdest ever, it was wild. People can be very strange.

Nothing wrong with that either IMO. I’d have laughed and asked what made her think that. I wouldn’t have assumed negative intent at all but just someone with a picture in their mind of me many years ago perhaps.

Oh, I’ve done this. I was just really surprised, I think. We worked in the kind of corporate environment where women are super quiet about any desire to reproduce. I’m mortified now, but she took it in her stride and was perfectly pleasant about it.

Perfectly innocent question IMO, OP. They’re just being nice - was it a surprise for you, etc. No agenda.

Yeah people asked me that too. So basically they want to know if you were intentionally having unprotected sex

Don't worry... we hung out the bunting and put an ad in the local newspaper for baby no2

I would returned the comment with, surely you must of heard us trying ! We were worried we would wake out neighbours 😅😅

My MIL asked me that when I was pregnant with DC2. I had a small gap between pregnancies and was still BFing (which was why she asked, she thought you couldn't get pregnant while BFing). I just laughed and said 'The usual way MIL' and we had a good giggle about it.

When DM was pregnant with her third child her Dad asked her 'what are you expecting this time?'. She had a DD and a DS and he clearly thought that was sufficient.

Now thats rude

I think its fine aslong as your family and friends are the type of people who use mumsnet and get offended about everything. I've said things like this multiple times and had it said to me multiple times without issue

You don't need lots of unprotected sex to have an accidental pregnancy

Congratulations OP

I remember telling someone I was pregnant with twins and they asked if it was planned 🙄
After having them I was out and a woman stopped me and asked if they were real twins I honestly didn’t know what she meant so I said I’m sorry what do you mean and she said well did you have to have IVF or are they real twins I was gobsmacked that someone would even ask that question I have had stranger comments and questions over the years.
Brace yourself OP you will encounter these strange people a long the way

Congratulations!
of course it’s weird question but people often tell weird things, and I suspect from my own experience that it’s often tiredness, lack of attention, brain working on three topics at once but nothing personal towards you.
I have a long list of this “accidents” when I came back home afterwards and thought : WtF I was thinking saying this????
So if this person was good otherwise I would let it go.

I had an old friend who I hadn’t seen for a few years (she lives in a different country now) say to me, via email, that “you are the last person in the world who I thought would have a baby.”

I didn’t know what to say to that so I never replied and I never heard from her again. People are just odd/rude sometimes.

When I told my boss, she replied 'rather you than me' 😳. She gave the same response to my colleague, who she knew had been having ivf for a few years and had finally got her longed for pregnancy.

Congrats, op!

Yeah some people are just cunts

I don’t think it’s an odd question to ask (if you’re close enough) but I’d probably phrase it as ‘were you trying’

I hate it when people ask this since it really is none of their business. However, you phrased the OP as if she should have assumed it was planned because you own a home and are married; as if unplanned pregnancies only happen to people who don't own a home and are not married. That is a very unreasonable thought. Plenty of married couples with their own house have unplanned pregnancies.

People also seem to ask this question to know how to respond. If it's any consolation, when I told my at the time best friend I was pregnant, she immediately tried to convince me to get an abortion. Could be worse!

Surely not?? Wtf

Haha yes it’s a bit rude.
May as well have asked ‘were you having lots of unprotected sex?’.

I got asked this a lot when I was pregnant with my first child. We had been married for over five years but had been trying to get pregnant for four years!