School not taking note of creepy behaviour

Yes, and then the boy's parents called the girls' parents to tell them the files were all completely harmless, and the girls must carry on being friends with him, or he'd be sad.

Why PPs keep saying the files (and screenshots) don't exist is a mystery.

And whether its all harmless or not, nobody should be punished for not wanting to be friends with someone.

Some kids ARE creepy though. I had a student a few years ago who used to sit in my lessons and whisper to other students what he was going to do to me. Slit my throat, stab me, hit me with a cricket bat.

Typically, I reported it to SLT and they did nothing. Ever.

It's not off-topic. Your point about what girls did to you was irrelevant, because those things were not done within a world in which you faced constant threats, both big and small, from women, and in which the possibilities of your life were not circumscribed by that fact.

It's actually quite easy to understand.

The OP said this - I saw screenshots of the folder view and each folder labelled with girls name

Maybe if you read OPs posts with the same enthusiasm that you have put into telling her none of this happened then you wouldn't be embarrassing yourself.

Several of your posts have been deleted for direct attacks on the OP. It's disgusting behaviour.

Having their every move recorded? How dramatic!

@thestudio Strip clubs for women don't exist, because women commodifying men's bodies isn't systemic.

That's because women have different sexual preferences than men. I'm not sure what your point is though, as it seems a bit off-topic.

That's completely different from a structural inequality which will affect every aspect of their lives.

The meaning/impact of what individuals do is completely contingent on the system in which the actions take place.

That's why, for example, a group of pissed women going to a male strip show is ethically completely different from a group of pissed men going to a strip club.

Strip clubs for women don't exist, because women commodifying men's bodies isn't systemic.

No she didn’t. She said some of the kids have seen it . She said some of the kids shared what they’ve seen with their parents. That’s what happens in a school. Then everything got deleted because the school (rightly or wrongly) came down hard on it.

Nobody who is being watched and having their every move recorded (along with photographs) is required to be friendly towards their watcher. This thread is like a stalker cheerleading squad.

You know what I find really interesting? When DD was being bullied, I did intervene. However I did not demand that those involved had to be nice or even talk to my child. I didn’t demand to be her friends. Quite the opposite.Neither did the school. I asked that they pretend DD doesn’t exist.

Yet this child’s parents and the school are insisting that’s what these girls must . Under threat.You seriously can’t see how fucked up that is? And yet they’re the bullies?

op has no idea as she’s not seen any of it. That’s why she’s repeatedly not answered these questions.

her daughter though - the one the headteacher has picked up for bullying - is definitely the victim here

deputy pulling up my child saying he has reported you being mean to him and you can’t ostracised him.

Also there’s not actually any evidence. Op has flip flopped between pretending she’s seen it, saying the girls have seen it and saying it’s all been deleted under the thread of suspension.

Can we clarify:

Exactly what are the photos of? Screenshots from website? Photos he took with consent? Photos without consent?

And what are the notes he said about the girls? You have said they were deemed creepy but not what they were.

The fact that the school took the sharing of the screenshots so seriously indicates they wouldn't take a lighthearted stance or brush unacceptable behaviour under the rug. So there must be some context to the situation.

The girls should absolutely not be made to do anything that makes them uncomfortable. Even if none of the above had happened they don't have to justify not wanting to be friends with someone. But thet do have to follow school expectations regarding respecting others.

It's a safeguarding issue. Inappropriate behaviour from boys, towards girls needs to be dealt with swiftly and appropriately. Are you not aware of the epidemic of violent behaviour against women and girls?

Violence against women and girls is increasing, with online harms and abuse affecting girls at a higher rate than boys

My ex colleague did this back in the 00's....

Do you accept that, if any of them knew you were doing this, they had the right not to want to interact with you?

Why don't you think that's true?

Where does it say that OPs daughter has been asked to stop bullying the boy?

The OP isn't demonising the boy, whoever shared the content on his device has bullied and demonised him. They should face consequences.

Do not minimise girls feelings when something like this happens. They are children and should not have to deal with this shit. Their feelings are completely valid.

For those saying about we should be supporting the victims: yes, absolutely, we should amplify the voices of women and girls and believe them when they report untoward behaviours.

The issue here is that: the school have investigated what has happened and have drawn a clear line. Schools have a duty to investigate all safeguarding incidents like this, they are also mandated to report criminal activity to the police. All schools are also safeguarding audited (I know how intense these are because I've been through one and despite having meticulous records, I feel like I'd been through a meat grinder backwards) and all records have to be available for OFSTED visits to show how these complaints/issues have been handled.

I know if the school have told people to delete/ suspended the person who spread the screenshots and have told the 'victims' to stop sharing etc there is a good reason for that, that we are not party to.

Does that mean we are not supporting victims? No.

It means that this incident should NOT have been shared on social media or Mumsnet as it perpetuates a witch hunt against a teen boy who we cannot possibly know all the facts about. It invites speculation and stretching of truths/ gang mentality to build.

As I said in my previous post: if the OP has genuine concerns it has been brushed under the carpet/ is untoward then they need to contact the police (non emergency) and formally complain but this thread is very 'unique' and I am sure that staff involved in the incident from school and the young boy's parents would recognise the details too.

Until all the facts are known (and they won't be because they will be confidential for a reason) this thread is doing nothing but causing harm and schools have strict social media policies for a reason.

yeaj op, can you?

only he hasn’t has he? Because it’s just kids chatting shit.

If you think it's a safeguarding concern school have not taken seriously, you report it to mash. That's the process.

Whether they take it seriously is another matter but that's the process

I would speak with the Safeguarding lead at school. And note their response.
If not happy, contact your local.safegusrding team and report the incident to them.

It is concerning for a pupil to be creating folders containing photos of girls (do the girls know their photos are being taken).

@Savethegirls and Yes I’m livid that its the girls’s responsibility to understand boys behaviour and suck it up because guess what? They should expect lot worse as the grow up.

I don't see why girls should be treated differently than boys. People do things we don't like, and we have to accept that as a part of life. People don't have a right not to be offended.

When I was at school, I was the butt of girl's jokes due to being ugly. Offensive? Yes. But there's nothing I could do about it... an important aspect of maturity is understanding that there are things that will annoy or upset you, and you have to learn how to process that.

The girls feel uncomfortable about this boy having pictures of them on his device.

It's not comparable to you having some posters up. Stop downplaying boys inappropriate behaviour and how girls feel about it.