Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Decluttering inspiration

56 replies

pollyhilly · 12/06/2026 08:31

Ive really lost control of the stuff in my house. It’s surface level tidy but every drawer and cupboard is full of stuff. There is so much I could get rid of - clothes, toys, books, things that haven’t been used in years. But it’s so overwhelming. It’s not even the thought of getting it all out, it’s getting it out and having to decide what to keep, what to bin, what to sell and so on. It feels insurmountable because literally every room (mine, kids, kitchen, living room) is the same.

I have very little free time between work and kids as well. I watch videos on social media of people in perfect small family homes that are just super organised and only seem to be full of useful stuff. Our house is quite big but that’s not necessarily a good thing because it’s more space to fill. I’ve always struggled with this sort of thing and dream of a small cosy home where everything is kept on top of and nothing is junky.

I need some tips and motivation to get going with this. Dd is unwell and just chilling on the sofa this morning so this could be a perfect time to make a start.

OP posts:
TheGirlattheBack · 12/06/2026 09:59

Lots of great advice so far. I’d add that if you start with the cupboard or drawer that you open most often, because you open it regularly and because the tidiness of it will make you happy, it will spur you on to do the rest.

Plan your decluttering around your bin day, so you’re doing something every 2 weeks when you know you have the bin space to get rid of things.

Rubbleonthedouble2 · 12/06/2026 09:45

Tbh I think you need to book time off work to do this. It's stressful enough putting a load of laundry on when you're working from home, or trying to tidy up the kitchen with children underfoot and noisy and needing things in the evening/weekend and I think you'd resent using your weekends on this.

So maybe once a month book a day off and choose a room or category or space and just get cracking and see what you can do.

Bjorkdidit · 12/06/2026 09:44

What I can't fathom is where all this stuff comes from. We don't shop/buy stuff unnecessarily (genuinely) and yet we also have cupboards with things that haven't been touched for years.

Just this morning I've emptied a drawer full of cables out and got rid of 8! old style telephone cables and a similar amount of TV aerial cables (we haven't had either for at least a couple of years). So that's at least half gone and a few more of other types could go but I need to think more about whether any are needed or not.

Heraldry · 12/06/2026 09:40

I could have written your post op. It doesn’t help that I’m a forty mile round trip away from the dump. I so want the relaxed headspace that decluttering would bring, but I save stuff because What If. I don’t have much money and I’d hate to have to rebuy something. But things aren’t getting used anyway as it’s all so messy!
Today I am going through 3 kallax boxes of toys and being firm…wish me luck!!

fashionqueen0123 · 12/06/2026 09:38

pollyhilly · 12/06/2026 08:31

Ive really lost control of the stuff in my house. It’s surface level tidy but every drawer and cupboard is full of stuff. There is so much I could get rid of - clothes, toys, books, things that haven’t been used in years. But it’s so overwhelming. It’s not even the thought of getting it all out, it’s getting it out and having to decide what to keep, what to bin, what to sell and so on. It feels insurmountable because literally every room (mine, kids, kitchen, living room) is the same.

I have very little free time between work and kids as well. I watch videos on social media of people in perfect small family homes that are just super organised and only seem to be full of useful stuff. Our house is quite big but that’s not necessarily a good thing because it’s more space to fill. I’ve always struggled with this sort of thing and dream of a small cosy home where everything is kept on top of and nothing is junky.

I need some tips and motivation to get going with this. Dd is unwell and just chilling on the sofa this morning so this could be a perfect time to make a start.

Watch an episode of Stacey Solomon’s sort your life out and then get a black bag.

I like the show because you really do need to get everything out of a room to see how bad it is, and what you’re happy to put back in. It’s the same principle as Marie Condo.

If you just pick a little through drawers etc you’ll never get rid of it properly. So I’d pick one room and empty every draw/wardrobe and go through the lot. Do another room
another day.

fashionqueen0123 · 12/06/2026 09:35

VividDeer · 12/06/2026 09:31

You just have to let go. I've just donated lovely expensive shoes, some unworn. I know i won't get round to selling. It's best just gone. The money is gone.

I donated some lovely sparkly
barely work shoes to a charity shop and they’ve used them in their window on display. If it helps attract people in then great!

fashionqueen0123 · 12/06/2026 09:34

LizardLore · 12/06/2026 09:00

Im paralysed by all the stuff I have that needs a small fix before being sold or donated.

So e.g. lovely wool trousers that are too small now. They were expensive and I can’t just chuck. But one of the hems has come down and I don’t have time or headspace to fix it.

I have dozens of items like this.

Please someone advise me 😣

Honestly just put it in a bag and take it to a clothing bank.

Or charity shop if you can sit and fix it today. It’s not going to fix itself.

Getting rid of stuff can actually be quite therapeutic. So I’d think of it as, ok they are
nice trousers but zero value to me right now. And if you were declaring mari condo style - they are not ‘sparking joy’. They are causing you stress. So take then to a clothing bank and get rid of that stress of thinking about them! You’ll feel better and will forget about them.

Samewrinklesnewname · 12/06/2026 09:31

LizardLore · 12/06/2026 09:00

Im paralysed by all the stuff I have that needs a small fix before being sold or donated.

So e.g. lovely wool trousers that are too small now. They were expensive and I can’t just chuck. But one of the hems has come down and I don’t have time or headspace to fix it.

I have dozens of items like this.

Please someone advise me 😣

It’s the sunk cost thing-the money has already been spent, they don’t fit and they need repaired-get rid of them.

Does that help?

VividDeer · 12/06/2026 09:31

LizardLore · 12/06/2026 09:00

Im paralysed by all the stuff I have that needs a small fix before being sold or donated.

So e.g. lovely wool trousers that are too small now. They were expensive and I can’t just chuck. But one of the hems has come down and I don’t have time or headspace to fix it.

I have dozens of items like this.

Please someone advise me 😣

You just have to let go. I've just donated lovely expensive shoes, some unworn. I know i won't get round to selling. It's best just gone. The money is gone.

BertieBotts · 12/06/2026 09:30

iniati · 12/06/2026 09:16

I have this issue too - for me it is children's games or toys with a missing part that is somewhere in the house.

Olio or Freecycle is good for this - you can be open about the missing element/flaw but usually someone will take it

I have a spot in the house on a shelf where I store things with a missing part or missing parts that I find so they can be reunited. Also a little decorative box which is where I put miscellaneous parts of toys/games rather than finding the proper box for them. This way any time we go to play a board game or do a puzzle, if a piece is missing I know where to look for it. It means that I don't put things aside to find the right box "later" and then forget about them meaning they get lost again.

MotherWol · 12/06/2026 09:29

Seconding what @BertieBotts says, look up Dana K White and the 5 steps. If selling stuff actually means that you end up with boxes/piles that you planned to sell but never get round to, accept that the sunk cost is gone, and just donate it. Freecycle and Facebook free groups are great, I've rehomed loads of stuff that charities don't want through them - e.g. baby equipment.

BertieBotts · 12/06/2026 09:28

Try sticking on the podcast and just going for it. Her tips of where to start are this:

Start in the most visible area(s) first. If you are paralysed and don't know where to start, get a binbag and stand at your front door as though you have just walked into the house. Start there, and start by looking for rubbish/recycling. If you don't find any, keep walking further into the house until something catches your eye.

OR her other tip of where to start is always dishes. So put the podcast on and empty the dishwasher/drainer if there are clean things there, and then go around the house finding dirty dishes to wash and put them into the dishwasher or wash a sink load full while listening.

midnights92 · 12/06/2026 09:27

Go by category, and start really small.

Ie not "clothes" but "tights" - get them all together, bin the holey ones and put them all away. Then maybe oldest child T-shirts, so you can either hand them down now or get rid if they're not wanted. That way you're not just moving stuff from cupboard to cupboard to "tick off" an area.b

I wouldn't overthink where to get rid of stuff. Good quality stuff to the charity shop, highest value stuff on vinted, everything else bin or recycling. If you haven't listed it on vinted or marketplace in two weeks you never will.

BertieBotts · 12/06/2026 09:21

There's an amazing podcast which changed the way I deal with things like this, it's called A Slob Comes Clean. She has a way to declutter without getting everything out and a way of cutting through to what actually works rather than getting overwhelmed. She has a book too - Decluttering at the Speed of Life.

TimeForTeaAndG · 12/06/2026 09:21

boundarysponge · 12/06/2026 09:15

I always get myself in the headspace of ‘this could be useful to someone else’. It really helps. So instead of keeping stuff that was once used, no longer fits , sitting in a cupboard…just give it to a charity shop where someone that size or with the sewing skills can use it.
I always have a massive shopping bag on the go for charity shop donations. As soon as it is full I take it but it’s really handy to just pop bits in as you’re passing rather than thinking of it as a massive project.

Charity shops will generally rag bag any clothes that needs fixed because people don't buy "damaged" items.

iniati · 12/06/2026 09:16

LizardLore · 12/06/2026 09:00

Im paralysed by all the stuff I have that needs a small fix before being sold or donated.

So e.g. lovely wool trousers that are too small now. They were expensive and I can’t just chuck. But one of the hems has come down and I don’t have time or headspace to fix it.

I have dozens of items like this.

Please someone advise me 😣

I have this issue too - for me it is children's games or toys with a missing part that is somewhere in the house.

Olio or Freecycle is good for this - you can be open about the missing element/flaw but usually someone will take it

boundarysponge · 12/06/2026 09:15

I always get myself in the headspace of ‘this could be useful to someone else’. It really helps. So instead of keeping stuff that was once used, no longer fits , sitting in a cupboard…just give it to a charity shop where someone that size or with the sewing skills can use it.
I always have a massive shopping bag on the go for charity shop donations. As soon as it is full I take it but it’s really handy to just pop bits in as you’re passing rather than thinking of it as a massive project.

ViciousCurrentBun · 12/06/2026 09:14

We have been going through the hidden clutter, loft and cupboards but it’s been since we retired so have time.

Unless you really need the money just give good quality stuff away to friends, ask first don’t offload, we have a road what’s app where people post unwanted stuff or put outside your house or to a charity shop.

DH is very guilty of thinking well I paid £10 for this and then if he gets rid of it looks as if it’s £10 lost whereas he lost the £10 when he bought it. That’s my reasoning anyway.

@LizardLore be realistic about the size of your ass, that’s what I thought when I went through my clothes. I had some weird post menopause boob size change and went up 2 cup sizes, I weigh about 8lb more post menopause but badly fitting clothes look terrible on everyone so away they went. Goodbye to my favourite tops that had no give.

We got rid of hundreds of books. Ones we will never ever read again, plus all the Cd, we had 500. I have loved it.

TimeForTeaAndG · 12/06/2026 09:07

LizardLore · 12/06/2026 09:00

Im paralysed by all the stuff I have that needs a small fix before being sold or donated.

So e.g. lovely wool trousers that are too small now. They were expensive and I can’t just chuck. But one of the hems has come down and I don’t have time or headspace to fix it.

I have dozens of items like this.

Please someone advise me 😣

Try local swap groups or craft groups, you might get someone who wants to practice hand sewing or whatever.

Though hems can literally be 2 minutes with some wondaweb and an iron.

LizardLore · 12/06/2026 09:00

Im paralysed by all the stuff I have that needs a small fix before being sold or donated.

So e.g. lovely wool trousers that are too small now. They were expensive and I can’t just chuck. But one of the hems has come down and I don’t have time or headspace to fix it.

I have dozens of items like this.

Please someone advise me 😣

FeedMeSantiago · 12/06/2026 08:54

We've been decluttering. I find starting small helps - e.g. a bathroom cupboard or a sideboard. If you try to sort out too much at once it gets overwhelming.

We have a two year old in a two bed flat so regular decluttering of clothes and toys is essential. He's recently had his birthday so we used that as an excuse to sort out his old baby toys to donate - a local charity who support mums in need are taking them today. They also took our old sterilisers, playmats, moses basket, baby bath etc.

Pickledonion1999 · 12/06/2026 08:53

Watch last nights episode of the stacey solomon programme ! It has inspired me to get sorted !

iniati · 12/06/2026 08:49

Start small. Really small.

Pick a drawer or cupboard, every day open it and take out three things to bin or donate.

Cheesecakeismeesecake · 12/06/2026 08:46

If you want to crack on this morning then you could use the timer method, set a timer 15 mins at first, grab a rubbish bag, and a donation box and be ruthless. But stop at 15 mins. Aim for a drawer or a surface while DD is recouperating

User122333 · 12/06/2026 08:43

Remember that you don’t see all the clutter behind the camera! I think Stacey Solomon mentions this in Stacey and Joe.

Totally agree with @Specialagentblond to stop buying more than the essentials.

Can you start with outgrown clothes and toys?

Is it a problem to decide where to pass the stuff on to? Some of the posters on the long-running Decluttering thread in the Housekeeping topic can help with suggestions.

Sometimes you have to say to relatives and friends that you love their generosity but it’s becoming a bit overwhelming and maybe they could have an outing instead.

Swipe left for the next trending thread