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What exactly is the strictness in English schools actually achieving?

607 replies

WaitAMinutePlease · 11/06/2026 21:08

I’ve been on Mumsnet for years and one thing that genuinely puzzles me is how strict many English schools seem to be.

The thread today about the little boy with severe leg pain, and his mum asked if he could temporarily leave school at 1.30pm instead of 3.30pm because he’s struggling physically. The school apparently refused and said they wouldn’t “release” him. (Sorry? You won’t ‘release’ MY child??? WTAF!)

I see similar threads all the time. Parents being threatened with fines over attendance, children not being allowed time off for family holidays, requests for flexibility being refused, schools insisting on attendance despite medical issues that are still being investigated, and so on.

I’m Irish, and honestly this feels ridiculous to me. Irish schools are generally much more pragmatic. If a child was struggling with a health issue, even one that hadn’t yet been formally diagnosed, most schools would work with the parents. Reduced hours, work sent home, flexibility around attendance, none of that would seem remotely controversial. Equally, while schools don’t encourage term-time holidays, taking children out of school for a family holiday isn’t generally treated as some major disciplinary issue.

What I don’t understand is what the strictness is actually achieving. Ireland has a higher proportion of students progressing to third-level education than England by a mile (approx 76% vs 46%), so it’s not obvious to me that a highly punitive attendance culture produces better educational outcomes.

So my question is: why are English schools like this?

Is it government pressure? Ofsted? League tables? Funding linked to attendance? Or is it actually genuinely believed that this level of strictness benefits children?

OP posts:
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Rubuxus · 11/06/2026 23:23

Btw for the number 1 achievers… the Danish…

Here’s their attitude to holidays…
https://www.reddit.com/r/foraeldreDK/comments/1i9uaoq/holdninger_til_ferie_uden_for_skoleferie/?tl=en

Danish headteacher:
Headmaster here.
Be careful in the first years, a lot happens socially and being away for two weeks can be a very long time in 0th grade. In the weeks leading up to the holidays, a lot happens socially, trips out of the house and other things. Orient yourselves in the yearly plans and feel free to ask the class teacher beforehand when it makes the most sense, or when it would at least be a shame for the children not to be at school. In addition, I would like to mention that if your child has many days off from school - illness or otherwise - then think about that too, it is typically here that the school starts to react negatively to holiday notifications.
Personally, I think it's lovely with parents who like to travel with their children and see the world and explore foreign cultures, if it's to lie by a pool in Crete while the children are looked after in the play area - then don't.

Bigtrapeze · 11/06/2026 23:23

Rubuxus · 11/06/2026 23:02

So I agree with you OP. And it’s infuriating because I have kids about to start school.

I am a 90s baby. Millennial. So in upper years of secondary c. 20 years ago. We had plenty of term time holidays, everyone I speak too did. We had a few bad eggs in secondaries but overall things were manageable behaviour wise in most schools.

Millenials are the most educated generation. Have the highest academic achievement in UK history, the highest IQs, the highest employment rate in history.

Clearly holidays and time off school for being ill was not a problem. It’s incredible how people are rewriting history in their heads.

What evidence do you have that IQ scores differ between generations? This would be incredibly difficult to quantify, not least because millennials have probably less experience as a generation of selective education systems that was a form of IQ test. I'm not sure who would fund research to find a difference in IQ scores according to dates of birth as I can't see the application of this. Please may you quote your data source? It would be a very interesting read.

WaitAMinutePlease · 11/06/2026 23:23

Anomyone · 11/06/2026 23:05

I'm also in Ireland and lived in UK previously. As I understand it, the irish constitution has it enshrined in law that parents are the primary educators of their children. This means, in my interpretation, that they cannot force as much to insist the child attends all classes. I can choice to withdraw my children for any classes if I wish (and I do withdraw from the crazily forceful religious class, which told my young son he's not as special as he's not baptised, but that's another story).
I know there's still a limit hereafter TUSLA is informed, around 20 days absent, maybe.
We have enjoyed term time holidays, nice and quiet and a good deal cheaper.

That’s interesting about the Irish constitution, I need to look it up. Maybe that’s why I’m so aghast at hearing a school saying they won’t ‘release’ a child when the parent wants them released. Like, WTF are you talking about you won’t give my child back to me 😅

My DC also didn’t do religion in primary school, there was him and another little girl, school made every accommodation and it wasn’t an issue in the slightest. Curriculum in secondary is much more broad ranging and theological so he does do it now.

OP posts:
CoffeeCakeAndALattePlease · 11/06/2026 23:23

I hate how strict schools are now - kids end of resenting school and teachers instead of respecting them.

I went to a comp in the 90s and things like detention were rare and for very poor behaviour. Kids now get them for very minor issues, it’s insane.

my dad was a secondary teacher for over 30 years and he hates the way things went. He felt the rules were getting worse and worse and all it did was create negativity and put kids in the wrong head space.

ShetlandishMum · 11/06/2026 23:23

Elsvieta · 11/06/2026 22:04

Why on earth do you think they should be allowed time off for holidays? Then they come back, they're behind and the teachers have to spend time getting them caught up and neglecting the rest of the class. Appalling behaviour by parents - and a terrible message to give the child.

We relocated at Christmas to a Scandinavian country. Dd2 started secondary school here. No uniforms.

You get a week or two extra holiday here from school if the pupil is doing reasonably well and you don't ask for time off at exam periods. It's no big thing here at all. A avarage student won't spoil their life because of a holiday.
The school just notes legal absence if a child are absent because of sickness, doctor or dentist.
If a pupil has more than 10% non legal absences in a quarter the school must contact the parents. If non legal absences reach 15% or more in the same quarter the headteacher is obliged to notify the municipality but it don't happen a lot because pf the legal absence policy.
Dd2 has got two weeks off as legal absence this summer to go to England. It has to fit with DS (in UK) og Dd1 (in Scandinavian) studies and work and of course our workplaces. It's not always that simple to plan around an international family.

I really don't miss English schools.

Honeyhonay · 11/06/2026 23:19

Corianda · 11/06/2026 23:12

The comparison was England and Ireland, not the UK which is a combination of several different education systems.
On average Ireland regularly outperforms England on global rankings for attainment.

SnipSnipMrBurgess · 11/06/2026 23:18

Im irish living in Ireland and had a school refuser through secondary school. He wasn't alone in being one, there were definitely others.

During this time I worked with the school to get support for him, they suggested reduced hours, later start times, sending work, a drop in room he could go to when he felt overwhelmed.

They didn't fine us, report us to Tusla/Dept of Education or penalise him for it.

He didnt have an IEP or a diagnosis or anything, this was just what they did to support when he needed it and I was greatful for it.

He finished school with no absences in the last year, went to college and is living a happy life.

tsmainsqueeze · 11/06/2026 23:18

Elsvieta · 11/06/2026 22:04

Why on earth do you think they should be allowed time off for holidays? Then they come back, they're behind and the teachers have to spend time getting them caught up and neglecting the rest of the class. Appalling behaviour by parents - and a terrible message to give the child.

Because a term time holiday makes the difference for some kids between having a holiday or not having a holiday at all.
I'm not talking about something fancy or 2 weeks in Disney , just a few days in a caravan in Wales near a beach.
Missing 5 term days max in a year makes bugger all difference to the absolute vast majority of children, but those days spent near the sea , on the beach ,and all the other usual holiday things kids love does make a difference.
There is more to life than school , learning can take place anywhere , you can't label all parents bad for doing this.
Life is for living and when we look back and our kids are grown and looking back too, none of us are going to agonise over a few missed school days.

CagedBirdInACage · 11/06/2026 23:13

Corianda · 11/06/2026 23:05

If all the DCs took 20 days off a year -2 2 week holidays, a possibility as people take multi holidays a year - surely it would impact their schooling

Given the high educational achievement of Irish children this doesn't seem to be an issue. I've taken my kids out for holidays before, never 20 days in a year but they are both nearing the end of education now and both doing very well. The way I saw it was they are bright kids, their work is always up to date, there is nothing that can be done during the length of a holiday that can't be caught up on. Now I did only choose to take them out in primary because secondary holidays are very long anyway, my 2 have already been off for a few weeks and won't be back until September.

JemimaTiggywinkles · 11/06/2026 23:11

WaitAMinutePlease · 11/06/2026 23:01

If a child was missing 40% of their schooling then there would absolutely be flags flown. I’d imagine the school would get involved and try to work with the parents to find a solution. If there were welfare concerns it would be escalated to social services.

Children can miss about 20 school days here without it being a huge disciplinary, fining and legal threat situation. Obviously if there were concerns about welfare, things would escalate faster.

And nowhere would our local authority step in, I just find that so strange. Why are office working civil servants in charge of fining parents for their children’s school attendance 😳

I know im going to sound like an arse, but you’re incredibly naive. Vague ideas of social services and flags being raised do suggest you’ve never known or worked with families like this. The poster talking about the child with unspecified leg pain meaning losing a third of their education was a giant red flag that you entirely missed.

In England local authorities are the ones with overall responsibility of ensuring that our government meets its obligations to educate every child. They’re the ones who have to figure out the hospital schools, support for the perm ex kids, young offenders institutions etc. It might be organised differently in Ireland, but there is (I assume) some branch of the government which checks the UN rights of the child are actually being met?

Honeyhonay · 11/06/2026 23:11

Children in secondary are already in school for significantly less days per year in Ireland compared to England which is interesting when you factor in the attainment differences.

Calliopespa · 11/06/2026 23:09

Oncemorewithsome · 11/06/2026 21:45

It’s a relatively modern thing which was brought in when Labour were last in government, added to by the Tories and continued by the current Labour government.

Essentially it’s down to some truly terrible reading of research. Apparently no one told any of these politicians that correlation is not causation.

Children who have more time off school are correlated with children who have lower attainment.

However time off school is also correlated with medical issues, chaotic home life and SEND. All of which INDEPENDENTLY would cause worse attainment.

A family holiday isn’t causing poor attainment.
Nor is a child who is having cancer treatment served well by insisting they are in school when they are unwell.

They should focus on ensuring families have enough money, supporting parental mental health issues, meeting children’s SEND and funding the NHS. Not penalising anxious children or stopping families having a few days off for auntie Jane’s wedding.

I would imagine everyone except the few people in power already agree.

This.

Honeyhonay · 11/06/2026 23:08

Corianda · 11/06/2026 23:05

If all the DCs took 20 days off a year -2 2 week holidays, a possibility as people take multi holidays a year - surely it would impact their schooling

And yet it’s common to take children out for holidays but Irish school attainment is regularly ranked higher than that of England.

ApplesAreNotRaspberries · 11/06/2026 23:06

Carriemac · 11/06/2026 21:38

Ireland has had a very homogeneous culture until recently . Very few non English speaking kids etc so easy to do well. Things are changing there as the population becomes more challenging .

So the reason why another country is doing something better is because in English schools there are people from other countries? Seriously?

Anomyone · 11/06/2026 23:05

I'm also in Ireland and lived in UK previously. As I understand it, the irish constitution has it enshrined in law that parents are the primary educators of their children. This means, in my interpretation, that they cannot force as much to insist the child attends all classes. I can choice to withdraw my children for any classes if I wish (and I do withdraw from the crazily forceful religious class, which told my young son he's not as special as he's not baptised, but that's another story).
I know there's still a limit hereafter TUSLA is informed, around 20 days absent, maybe.
We have enjoyed term time holidays, nice and quiet and a good deal cheaper.

Corianda · 11/06/2026 23:05

If all the DCs took 20 days off a year -2 2 week holidays, a possibility as people take multi holidays a year - surely it would impact their schooling

CagedBirdInACage · 11/06/2026 23:04

JemimaTiggywinkles · 11/06/2026 22:53

What does Ireland do about parents who think it is completely fine for kids to only attend school 60% of the time? Because in England schools are told we have to step in where parents are neglecting their children’s education in this way. I’m really not sure it was better when we just left them to get on with it. (Because I now have the children of those poorly education people in my school. Parents who never had a job, didn’t value education, some even ended up in prison and the next generation isn’t likely to fare any better unless we intervene.)

I suppose I come at this from a very different perspective than the average MN user. I was a kid on free school meals. We were properly poor. But education saved me, and my siblings. We are all able to provide for ourselves (and families for those who had kids). We don’t worry about money the way our parents did. The kids I teach deserve the same chance I had, the same chance my previous (private / grammar schools) kids had. I refuse to lower the standards for these kids.

As far as I am aware if children miss more than 20(?) days the school is obliged to report it to Tusla(social services). I'm not sure what happens from that point.

JemimaTiggywinkles · 11/06/2026 23:03

CaesarAugusta · 11/06/2026 22:52

Poor attendance is strongly correlated with poor achievement, the EEF research suggests that disrupted schooling, principally student absence, is the second most important influence on school achievement, especially in disadvantaged students.

The trouble is that some schools are ludicrously hypocritical about this. Where they use isolation and suspensions a lot, that means children lose large amounts of teaching, and giving them worksheets to do in isolation certainly doesn't make up for that. If one day off school is meant to be so harmful for attendance purposes, why does it apparently suddenly stop mattering when they want to put children in isolation? It just sets up a vicious circle in many cases - when children get back into class, they've missed so much they have no idea what is going on and may well play up even more to disguise that fact.

It isn’t hypocritical to say that disrupted learning is very bad. Our ideal is obviously to have all pupils in class and learning. If there is a pupil who is disrupting the learning of all the others sometimes the only option is to remove the disruptor. I’m not sure what else could be done?

BatFeminist · 11/06/2026 23:03

CaesarAugusta · 11/06/2026 22:52

Poor attendance is strongly correlated with poor achievement, the EEF research suggests that disrupted schooling, principally student absence, is the second most important influence on school achievement, especially in disadvantaged students.

The trouble is that some schools are ludicrously hypocritical about this. Where they use isolation and suspensions a lot, that means children lose large amounts of teaching, and giving them worksheets to do in isolation certainly doesn't make up for that. If one day off school is meant to be so harmful for attendance purposes, why does it apparently suddenly stop mattering when they want to put children in isolation? It just sets up a vicious circle in many cases - when children get back into class, they've missed so much they have no idea what is going on and may well play up even more to disguise that fact.

Because those children are in isolation as they were disrupting the learning of the other 31 students in the room. No teacher wants to put a child in isolation with a worksheet, they just want to teach.

Rubuxus · 11/06/2026 23:02

So I agree with you OP. And it’s infuriating because I have kids about to start school.

I am a 90s baby. Millennial. So in upper years of secondary c. 20 years ago. We had plenty of term time holidays, everyone I speak too did. We had a few bad eggs in secondaries but overall things were manageable behaviour wise in most schools.

Millenials are the most educated generation. Have the highest academic achievement in UK history, the highest IQs, the highest employment rate in history.

Clearly holidays and time off school for being ill was not a problem. It’s incredible how people are rewriting history in their heads.

WaitAMinutePlease · 11/06/2026 23:01

JemimaTiggywinkles · 11/06/2026 22:53

What does Ireland do about parents who think it is completely fine for kids to only attend school 60% of the time? Because in England schools are told we have to step in where parents are neglecting their children’s education in this way. I’m really not sure it was better when we just left them to get on with it. (Because I now have the children of those poorly education people in my school. Parents who never had a job, didn’t value education, some even ended up in prison and the next generation isn’t likely to fare any better unless we intervene.)

I suppose I come at this from a very different perspective than the average MN user. I was a kid on free school meals. We were properly poor. But education saved me, and my siblings. We are all able to provide for ourselves (and families for those who had kids). We don’t worry about money the way our parents did. The kids I teach deserve the same chance I had, the same chance my previous (private / grammar schools) kids had. I refuse to lower the standards for these kids.

If a child was missing 40% of their schooling then there would absolutely be flags flown. I’d imagine the school would get involved and try to work with the parents to find a solution. If there were welfare concerns it would be escalated to social services.

Children can miss about 20 school days here without it being a huge disciplinary, fining and legal threat situation. Obviously if there were concerns about welfare, things would escalate faster.

And nowhere would our local authority step in, I just find that so strange. Why are office working civil servants in charge of fining parents for their children’s school attendance 😳

OP posts:
BatFeminist · 11/06/2026 22:59

noblegiraffe · 11/06/2026 21:36

I see similar threads all the time. Parents being threatened with fines over attendance, children not being allowed time off for family holidays, requests for flexibility being refused, schools insisting on attendance despite medical issues that are still being investigated, and so on.

Because attendance at English schools is absolutely shocking so there is huge top-down pressure from the government via Ofsted and other targets to improve it.

Schools don’t issue the fines, that’s not up to them either.

This

Porkydorky · 11/06/2026 22:58

I am in Ireland but have also lived in various parts of the UK. I feel that schools in the UK tend to have to take on much more of a ‘social care’ role than is expected of schools in Ireland - possibly because, as a previous poster has pointed out, schools in England are run by the local authority/council whereas in Ireland they answer to the department of education only and are not part of a council’s remit.

Also, education in Ireland has historically been seen to be an answer to poverty and is still seen as a positive and achievable way to improve your life. Perhaps in England this has not been the case in recent times?

JemimaTiggywinkles · 11/06/2026 22:58

CaesarAugusta · 11/06/2026 22:47

The problem lies in part with the academy system. When an academy takes over a school the new management feel that they have to be seen to be making a difference, and the easy way to do that is to impose an expensive new uniform with lots of logos, and ridiculously rigid discipline policy that enables them to chuck out the difficult children (especially those inconvenient SEN children) at the earliest possible moment. Of course, it would be much better if they concentrated on being bloody good teachers, but that's much more difficult.

The best teacher in the world cannot teach children who refuse to even stay in the classroom. I’ve taught when there were no consequences- kids weren’t safe (to the point I nearly quit) and nobody learned anything. I’m now known as one of the “strictest” teachers in the school and most parents want me to teach their kids. Children with SEN actually outperform those without SEN in my classes. Because calm, orderly classrooms are really good for the vast majority of children with SEN.