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AIBU?

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To say to my boss during a team meeting that his speech was unprofessional

34 replies

MeghannCleary · 11/06/2026 16:34

Without being too outing I am in a support function similar to Compliance in a financial services company and my Boss is not British so I don't know if the culture difference plays a role but he often talks flippantly of people being 'fired' in this or that department when I know at least a few of them left to join elsewhere for a better pay and better work culture

Anyway, at a team meeting today, he spent TWO HOURS (ran over into lunch time and beyond and my blood sugar had plummeted) telling us how easily we could be fired (about ten people in the team/meeting) for the 'low quality reports' we produced and how he was sick of it.

The only concrete e.g. he could give re the reports was a name or two wrong in the 'to send to' list - that still didn't make it clear to us why he takes weeks sometimes months to review and finalize these reports.

I was biting my cheek to stay wordless and calm - the others on the team mostly men were so calm I wondered if they were watching anime on another screen or just asleep with eyes open. Wish I could have done the same

Had some sort of meltdown where I went into a fugue state I reckon and saying it was really stressful to all of us when he bantered casually about us being fired or threw the word around flippantly for TWO HOURS. Surely a person who is being 'fired' in Corporate Britain at least from what I have seen, is dismissed in private and with dignity ? We are educated professionals not schoolkids.... I think I said as much and more

Waiting in state of high anxiety now for some sort of axe to fall. WWYD? start looking for another Job? Damn me and my big mouth

OP posts:
Chestandback · 11/06/2026 18:04

ProudCat · 11/06/2026 17:44

I love the word fugue. So underused.

I just looked it up! Vaguely remembered what it meant but been years since I heard it.

OP, I voted YABU for worrying about what you said. Good for you for taking a stand, not only for you but the team, and what you said was very reasonable and I agree with every word, regardless of the law or how long you’ve been there.

Pearlstillsinging · 11/06/2026 17:59

In the UK Employment Law is that except in the case of gross misconduct, no-one who has 2 yrs continuous employment for one employer can just be fired. There is a many stepped process to go through. I can't see that missing a name off a list could be considered gross misconduct.
I would speak to HR about this constantly threatening behaviour contributing to workplace stress. And if you are a union member, you should contact them

Arlanymor · 11/06/2026 17:55

Personally, I would have raised it with him afterwards, particularly if I was slipping into a fugue state where I am not going to be in charge of my faculties sufficiently. If I confront someone in front of others I need to be really coherent and clear on what I am saying and why I am saying it. That doesn't happen with fugue. If you challenge you need to be clear and unequivocal, but also polite and professional. I'm not saying you weren't those things but it doesn't go along with 'fugue'.

StrictlyAFemaleFemale · 11/06/2026 17:51

ProudCat · 11/06/2026 17:44

I love the word fugue. So underused.

I've never seen it in that context before. I shall try and use it in a sentence forthwith.

Second the pp on contacting HR.

I work in Denmark. We get fired too - no being made redundant. We even have firing rounds. If it's really bad then you might be bortvist which I suppose means expelled?

JollyGreenWatermelon · 11/06/2026 17:49

I am not sure "having a meltdown" because you disagree is a sign of being a professional

ProudCat · 11/06/2026 17:44

I love the word fugue. So underused.

Secondbestpriest · 11/06/2026 17:38

Was the meeting recorded? If so can you can access the recording so you can see whether you sounded coherent. Your boss sounds like a twat. I don't blame you!

whippersnapper55 · 11/06/2026 17:26

You would not be unreasonable to speak up in a calm and professional manner. It doesn't sound like that's what happened though 😳 do you think it's worth contacting HR and pre-empting any action by him? A well thought out email to the right person, setting out what happened in the meeting and your concerns that it will be used against you, might be worth doing?

MeghannCleary · 11/06/2026 17:19

no comments so far ....but all votes say I wasnt aibu....thx.....

OP posts: