To find lazy adults really grating?

Same here - People including my own mother said i was lazy. Now i have to actually schedule in rest days to ensure recovery

Lazy or not, what are you getting out of this? Stop this stupid rivalry, you both have different lives, different experiences and different outlooks.

You know, you're going to encounter all sorts of people with different views out there and if you take it all personally and try to assert your way of doing things as 'right' all the time you're going to alienate yourself. You two are different, just let it go. You don't need validation from a bunch of internet strangers, just do what you like doing and leave her to hers.

The real question here is why it bothers you so much.

The bigger question here is why do you give a shit what she does...?

What about her lifestyle is lazy to you? @myothersockis

I think you should be both more tolerant of one another's choices.

That’s not laziness that you describe. Her life - she can do as she pleases.

laziness is when someone’s lack of responsibilty for taking care of things in their life impacts on others.

No its not - its her choosing to live her life that way - Your not her mother she free to do what she wants as an adult - If she ridicules you you riducule her back
Dont be friends with her if you dont like her

There are plenty of threads on MN currently moaning (quite justifiably in some cases, in my opinion) about the state of the UK.

But one of our less spoken about problems in the UK comes from a lack of aspiration and a fear of hard work of our citizens - recent and long standing.

Obviously this is a generalisation and before I get flamed I am not suggesting it applies to all those defending the OPs friend BUT there is a very defensive tone about some of the responses.

We are not going to make a better society if people feel morally justified in refusing to engage with the outside world beyond the minimum required by their workplace.

It's neither healthy nor helpful on a personal or societal level.

How I spend my day and time is up to me, if there was anyone else who didn't respect that, they wouldn't be my friend.

I agree there are lots of ways to achieve good health, and if someone prefers gardening, DIY, walking dogs or helping people move house, that's great.

The difference is that many modern jobs involve sitting at a desk all day. Most people aren't chopping wood, farming, carrying water or doing manual labour anymore. For a lot of us, the gym is simply a practical way of replacing the physical activity that used to be built into everyday life.

I don't see it as simulating productivity. I see it as compensating for the fact that modern life is often remarkably sedentary. Your example of dog walking - I already have a dog and I walk her as well as going to the gym because I like lifting weights and I cant do that on a dog walk. Since menopause, my doctor recommended lifting weights for bone density and so the gym is highly productive to me to help me keep my bones strong. I only have so much time in the day and if I can get all my fitness needs met at the gym then I will do that. I dont have time for 5 different activities in the day plus a full time job and kids at secondary school. Plus, I like the community atmosphere and the friends I have made at the gym so there have been social advantages to it too!

judgy little madam aren’t you?

it’s her business, not yours.

Again i dont think working 5.5 hrs per day and sleeping 7-8 hrs per day and spending free time on non physical exercise make a person lazy.
Eg: i dont think someone whose hobby is reading rather than jogging males a person lazy.
I dont think it reasonable she judges you for choosing physical hobbies either.
You both need to accept that people different with different needs and are free to make different choices with regard to how many hrs they sleep,rest or what hobbies they choose.
Perhaps there are reasons for a person choices.
You seem upset that she judges you, yet you judge her.

She may have a medical condition that you are unaware of. I have a condition that I became aware of when I was a teenager. It wasn't diagnosed for decades. I keep it to myself & only one person knows because I am a very private person & because of embarrassment. Please don't judge. I get very tired & I am in constant pain.

I'm not lazy (have a very difficult job, work long hours, run a business, volunteer, do chores around the house, have a child etc) but I love a lie in and will often stay in bed until 11am. I prefer being up late and have always been a night owl. Not everyone has to be a morning person.

And you're bitching about her to internet strangers. I know who I would prefer to know.

But we all have different views on that, don't we.

And there are lots of ways to achieve health outcomes. Gyms are a relatively new invention in the history of humans because we stopped using our bodies productively and now simulate productive use in a purpose-designed location that achieves the health benefits but not the corollary tasks.

OK, so what if she's lazy? We all have our flaws, real or perceived. She's lazy, you're petty, sneery and judgemental. Live your life how you want and maybe don't judge other people when their lifestyle has no impact on your own.

Improved strength, cardiovascular fitness, mobility, bone density and mental health seem like fairly productive outcomes to me.

It's absolutely fine if the gym isn't your thing, but that doesn't make it mindless or self-indulgent any more than reading a novel, gardening or browsing Mumsnet.

There are no lazy Nursery assistants. It is a very demanding job mentally and physically. She recognises that she needs to chill and rest on her time off.

You sound like you really despise her - just because you have different interests.

I'm absolutely horrified at the entire nation of Australia being such terrible lazy arses, because the vast majority of them are just 'rotting in bed' whilst I am at work!!

Op just imagine for a minute that the normal work day was from 12pm til 8pm, then you have evening activities and need to cook a meal etc so the earliest you can go to bed is around 1-2am, just imagine how knackered and out of rhythm you'd be as a morning person, that's how night owls feel every single day of their lives.

Getting up at 10am for a 12 start at work and going to bed at 1 or 2 in the morning would be absolutely spot on for me, I'd probably be about 50% more productive if that was the case. Unfortunately it's not, so I spend the majority of the working day (especially the morning) yawning my head off and longing for my bed. Then by the time 11pm rolls around I'm staring at the ceiling for 3 hours because my body has decided this is the time when my energy levels will be at their peak.

But is the gym really what you can honestly call "productive"? So many threads on here where mums get pissed off with dads who slope off to the gym for a self-indulgent session while they battle on with the dc.

I personally find the gym a rather mindless "hobby." If you want to be productive, there are lots of ways to tone your body and up your fitness that don't involve sweating in a room with other people sweating in a room and no real productive outcome. Offer to help someone move house, do housework or gardening for an elderly local, walk people's dogs. Be a useful person.

I know people like you, who get up really early and feel it is some kind of moral achievement. Also people who feel the gym is a kind of badge of "better humanness."

In short, they are not traits that impress me.

People have different circadian rhythms, which is about all it comes down to. You are probably getting tired and crashing in bed when many of us are still sitting up burning the midnight oil on a spreadsheet or similar. Maybe we see that as lazy?

Where I will agree with you is socials are a total waste of time. Like MN which I use to distract myself when swapping between tasks and am trying to stop ... But the bedtime thing is neither here nor there. You sound smug and a bit small-minded tbh.