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Original poster

Bonus payment for referring a friend for a job - would you share it?!

61 replies

CaseClosedWineOpened · 10/06/2026 23:25

A few months ago, a colleague in another team mentioned that they were recruiting for a role. I said I might know someone suitable.

I spoke to a friend and she was really keen so I forwarded her CV. Fast-forward and she got the job with a decent pay bump over her previous salary. Really pleased for her!

It turns out I am going to get a referral bonus of £2000. I wasn’t aware of this when I referred her because I’ve only been there a short time myself.

So, my question is - if you were my friend, how would you feel about my windfall? TBH I am planning to keep it, but thinking maybe I’ll take her out for a little celebration, my treat? 🥂

Would love to hear perspectives.

YABU - share it you selfish cow
YANBU - it’s all yours!

OP posts:
New posts on this thread. Refresh page
Tabarnak · 14/06/2026 22:01

CaseClosedWineOpened · 10/06/2026 23:40

Appreciate the feedback so far, thank you. I think I’m worried that she’ll feel resentful that I’m getting this bonus because of her and then keeping it all to myself 😬

That’s mad. She got a job with a pay rise because of you - is she going to share that?

daisyfallout · 14/06/2026 21:36

I would be buying you a lunch as your friend, not vice versa tbh.

Original poster
CaseClosedWineOpened · 14/06/2026 21:23

Thanks all - appreciate the insights and based on the vote I feel okay to stick with my original plan. There were a few people who said they would share (very generous!), but hoping my friend is one of the people who would be in the same camp as the majority and not expect it. I’m looking forward to a night out with her to celebrate her new job and the fact we get to work together which is nice 😊

OP posts:
Original poster
CaseClosedWineOpened · 12/06/2026 00:13

Secretseverywhere · 11/06/2026 23:49

You will have to pay tax and NI on it so may be less thsn you think. It also might push you into a higher tax bracket for the month too so you might be waiting until next year for a rebate. If you have any outstanding student loans, they will get a share. Possibly paying pension contributions on it too? I was really disappointed when I got about 36% of a bonus in my take home pay once.

I’d probably mention there is a bonus and take for a nice lunch to celebrate, she could recommend someone in the future and do the same.

Totally hear this! Bonuses and pay rises sound amazing until you factor in all the deductions and realise the net amount 😩😩

OP posts:
Secretseverywhere · 11/06/2026 23:49

You will have to pay tax and NI on it so may be less thsn you think. It also might push you into a higher tax bracket for the month too so you might be waiting until next year for a rebate. If you have any outstanding student loans, they will get a share. Possibly paying pension contributions on it too? I was really disappointed when I got about 36% of a bonus in my take home pay once.

I’d probably mention there is a bonus and take for a nice lunch to celebrate, she could recommend someone in the future and do the same.

sohard · 11/06/2026 23:27

It’s the done thing where I am to share the referral bonus.

shuffleofftobuffalo · 11/06/2026 23:20

I can’t imagine why you’d think you need to share it in any circumstances - it’s a scheme the company run and you met the criteria. My company has a similar scheme, I was recruited into the company on a colleague’s recommendation, I hope he got the bonus and it’s none of my business if he did or didn’t. Enjoy your bonus!

bumptybum · 11/06/2026 20:37

CaseClosedWineOpened · 10/06/2026 23:40

Appreciate the feedback so far, thank you. I think I’m worried that she’ll feel resentful that I’m getting this bonus because of her and then keeping it all to myself 😬

You got the bonus for referring her. She hit her much wanted job because you referred her.

a job is a much bigger win than the bonus.

id she sharing her pay with you?

OnTheBoardwalk · 11/06/2026 20:34

Nope I didn’t share mine when I got £5k for referring someone. After tax, NI and pension there wasn’t a lot left

i took him out for a nice meal although that was more of a celebration of us working for the same firm again

if they ask (I’m sure they won’t) tell them you want 10% of their pay increase a month

Fridayfederica · 11/06/2026 20:23

I was in this position and shared £1000 equally, but my friend was on a much lower wage than me. Had she been on a higher wage than me I think I would have just taken her out for lunch.

BognorRegenia · 11/06/2026 20:11

Yep, I'd keep it. Presumably she could also refer someone and get the 2k in the future as she now works for the same company

FairyBatman · 11/06/2026 14:38

You got a bonus, she got a job!

newfriend05 · 11/06/2026 14:32

I wouldn’t say anything

Gonnagetgoingreturnsagain · 11/06/2026 12:29

CaseClosedWineOpened · 11/06/2026 08:11

To answer some questions:

I think it will be taxed so any sharing would have to be of the net amount after tax.

The policy doesn’t say anything about the new employee passing probation or about the new employee also getting a bonus.

She hasn’t mentioned anything to me, but I am going to assume that she either knows or will find out at some point as anyone in the company can read the policy - which states the amount awarded.

We have been good friends for 10+ years. Personal friends rather than work friends.

She’d be a bit of a bitch and not much of a friend if she does expect to share it. So hopefully a 10 years plus close friendship means more to her.

Gonnagetgoingreturnsagain · 11/06/2026 12:28

CaseClosedWineOpened · 11/06/2026 08:11

To answer some questions:

I think it will be taxed so any sharing would have to be of the net amount after tax.

The policy doesn’t say anything about the new employee passing probation or about the new employee also getting a bonus.

She hasn’t mentioned anything to me, but I am going to assume that she either knows or will find out at some point as anyone in the company can read the policy - which states the amount awarded.

We have been good friends for 10+ years. Personal friends rather than work friends.

With your update I’ll reply more. As you’re personal friends you don’t have to share anything. As you’ll be working together you could take her out for lunch when you’re working in office on same day or for a more lavish lunch. I’m surprised it’s not conditional on her passing probation but it’s good that it’s not. As pp said you helped her to get this job in this tough job market and saved your company recruitment fees and processes. If I were your friend I’d definitely not expect to share this bonus fee awarded to you. And I would be happy with a nice lunch as a thank you. Hopefully your friend is happy with that too.

Original poster
CaseClosedWineOpened · 11/06/2026 08:11

To answer some questions:

I think it will be taxed so any sharing would have to be of the net amount after tax.

The policy doesn’t say anything about the new employee passing probation or about the new employee also getting a bonus.

She hasn’t mentioned anything to me, but I am going to assume that she either knows or will find out at some point as anyone in the company can read the policy - which states the amount awarded.

We have been good friends for 10+ years. Personal friends rather than work friends.

OP posts:
oliviaAustin · 11/06/2026 08:01

No. Most workplaces offer this and you don’t share with the friend… you got them a job!

Offherrockingchair · 11/06/2026 07:56

Don’t worry about it. Your workplace could have had a scheme whereby you both got some money after eg 6 months, which is what mine does. They don’t and so you haven’t done anything wrong!

Massagetimemachine · 11/06/2026 07:45

Keep it for yourself but if you fancy treating her to something then that’s a lovely thing to do. You get the bonus, your friend gets a new job, everyone wins!

WeasellyCreature · 11/06/2026 07:44

Shouldn’t she take you out to lunch for being instrumental in her getting a great job?

Pickledonions12 · 11/06/2026 07:30

JulietteHasAGun · 11/06/2026 05:49

Well she got a job because of you. I assume she’s not sharing her wages with you. Keep the bonus! Your employer has saved recruitment fees which is why they are rewarding you. So not really anything to,do,with her. It’s between you and your employer.

Show quote history

Yes.....is she sharing half her wage bump with you each month (after tax)? No. I didn't think so. Don't share

KitchenColourandstyle · 11/06/2026 07:30

Have you checked the details of the scheme? At my work referer and referee both get a bonus (on successful completion of probation) so no need to share.

dartmoordays · 11/06/2026 07:23

I’d keep it and use it to pay off a loan I’ve got to be honest

Evolutionarygoals · 11/06/2026 07:22

If a friend referred me for a job, which I subsequently got, and she got a bonus for it, I'd be thrilled that she'd been rewarded for helping me out. If she was a close friend, i'd probably be even more thrilled. It wouldn't occur to me that I should have any of her money. I'd probably take her out for lunch to thank her for the referral.

IAMFLUFF · 11/06/2026 07:15

I shared equally with my friend when I got him a job at my company. It was only £300 and went through payroll so was taxed at my marginal rate. Think we ended up with about £80 each. I’d share but that’s just me.