AIBU to expect vegan guests to avoid preaching at shared meals?

ETA - I didnt see all the other pages when I posted the below.

"Flexitarian" Why do people need to jump on the band wagon and give themselves a label when they eat all the food groups? 🤣

Anyway, as a Veggie (trying but failing to become vegan) were your friends preaching or were they being goaded?

Some non-vegans are dicks and think winding up non meat eaters is a sport in which case your friends may not be unreasonable to go into details. I don't care what other people eat and have never commented on their/my diet but I've still had people think it's hilarious to make chicken noises while eating or talk about how "delicious flesh tastes" (actually quote) and describe it in detail while we're eating just to try to get a stir out of me.

Equally some vegans are just dicks and think it's OK to criticise people's food choices and try to upset them. They exist but are less common than people like to think.

Oh, I know that. I should have said ‘you want to be vegetarian’ or ‘your inclination is to be vegetarian’.

Not very dtrong principles if you renege on them on a whim. Far more irritating than being vegetarian/vegan. Especially for a host.

What is telling about your post is the way you have generalised your complaint. You didn't ask about a specific incident caused by individual people, you asked about "vegan guests". The implication is that all vegan guests act in a particular way. Your strange prejudice shines through.
Ask your vegan guests how often they get questioned, challenged, mocked, and insulted. You might be surprised. Like people who choose not to drink alcohol, it hits a nerve with others that says more about them, than the teetotaller or vegan.

Wow, how original and hilarious.

That was a long 45 minutes!

@Miranda65 how do you know someone’s a super clever, hilarious meat eater?

Don’t worry they’ll tell you their super original vegan joke, after it’s already been posted 100 times.

Eating meat doesn’t do much for intelligence or originality, does it.

I had one militant vegetarian as teenager. She would absolutely preach to you during meals. The one time I lost it with her and it was last time I eat in her company was when bunch of us went for pizza and few of us had meat ones and she went off telling us how bad it is and how we shouldn't eat it and how we should care etc. Totally ruined mood.
We were teenagers though and she was very passionate.
Met handful of people like that as adult. I got more "you shouldn't eat that much carb" at meals at one point when it was in 😂

How do you know someone is a lazy stereotyping vegan basher?

They will come on to mumsnet and tell you, and they think they are being so original and witty about it.

They are just so boring and predictable.

I'm not vegan or vegetarian. I'm not a twat.

This! It doesn’t matter if you eat mostly something. If you eat meat, dairy, plants, fish.. then you eat everything.

Yet more lazy stereotyping.

This just isn't true of any vegans and vegetarians I know.

Why the need to vegan bash? Hmm?

I'm an omnivore BTW, just not an arsehole.

How do you know someone eats meat?

They’ll be on every vegan and vegetarian thread having a meltdown about it.

The thin skin and inferiority complex don’t belong to the plant eaters.

🤦‍♀️

YANBU. Reminds me of the old joke...... "How do you know someone's a vegan?" "They tell you!".

Such a stereotypical response from uneducated, bigoted omnivores.

This doesn't happen most of the time.

Why are you so rude about vegans? I'm an omnivore, but I'm not an arsehole about it to people who choose not to eat animals or animal byproducts.

No, vegetarians don’t ever eat meat, fish or poultry.

Goodness it’s been at least 2 days since there was a vegan bashing thread.

Maybe worry more about how obsessively annoyed you are by vegans to be starting a thread about hypothetical preaching and work on your boundaries so that you are not eating meat for the sake of not offending people.

What you see as preaching is much more likely to be people having spines and sticking to their principles in a way you are unable to. It’s really not that hard - ‘no thank you, I don’t eat meat’.

Arf.

Sounds like you’re vegetarian, if you only ate a bit if chicken ‘to not cause offence or awkwardness’. In that case, be up front about your preferences.

Its completely meaningless and tells a host nothing about what the person actually eats. What are the “dietary principles” of someone who eats the same food as everyone else around them? Plenty of people eat a lot of meat free or vegetarian dishes in their diet - they are still bog standard omnivores who want to be speshul IME and I’ve had far more preaching from self described “flexitarians” than any veggie or vegan.

Eat veggie/vegan or don’t - I really don’t care. But this nonsense of making up meaningless terms just makes life more difficult those who are actually vegetarian or vegan.

OTOH if I’m hosting someone I don’t expect them to bring their own dinner either just because they don’t eat the same as me. If the OP is so keen to be “plant based” by which I assume they mean vegan, then I would expect them to cook a vegan dinner, not meat with the vegans providing their own.

You're a terrible host if you expect people to bring something.

The most bizarre thing is that you indicate you're a people pleaser and eat food you don't want to so as not to be difficult but you're resentful of someone else having boundaries and eating around other food.

Which seems like baloney to me because if you're mostly plant based yourself and you est that way out of choice, how much non-vegan food are you making for their visit?

I find it really odd that you eat a plant-based diet most of the time (in your original post) but then expect vegans to bring their own food when hosting. Why not just cook the plant-based meals that you apparently enjoy and cook for yourself most of the time when you have people round for dinner?

No, and inarticulate, thin-skinned and bad-tempered are a poor combination. I’m surprised one of her visiting vegans didn’t whack her with a nut loaf.

I'm a lot like you in that I don't eat much meat and, as my previous post illustrates, I'm quite happy eating vegetarian/vegan food, although do draw the line at vegan cheese.

I don't particularly like beef and would never eat steak at a restaurant because to me, it's a total waste of money. It's usually the most expensive thing on the menu and can be cooked in 5 minutes by anyone so why pay restaurant prices for something that you can make at home with no effort or skill?

I often choose food without meat in a restaurant and get the comments and confusion from people who think that must mean I'm vegetarian. Funniest time was when I was working away and had spinach and ricotta cannelloni for dinner, something I really enjoy and often choose. No comment was made until I sat down the next morning in front of the same people with bacon and black pudding from the breakfast buffet.

It's all just food, humans are omnivores, unless you have actual dietary requirements or allergies what more needs to be said?

The OP is not going to say; too many posters have asked them to do it.