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AIBU?

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Help!!! Child nursery meltdown

35 replies

irishchick93 · 09/06/2026 22:49

Hey. My almost 3 year old has been attending daycare 2 x days a week for a full year. A full year of crying every single time we go. Has started recently saying "no puddleducks" everytime we get into the car ... any day of the week. He apparently settles okay and has a bap and his snack there although wont eat there food. Its actually giving me such anxiety every morning we go as I only sent him to socialize and have a bit of a break as i work nights but honestly just thinking of pulling him out.

We jave an option for a pre pre place 2 hours 3 x times a day from september but are they just going to cry going going there too.
Or should i perservere or any tips?

Amy advice welcome please!!! 🤯🤯🤯🤯🤯

OP posts:
irishchick93 · 09/06/2026 23:35

@sprigatito thanks. Whats your thoughts on it being seperation anxiety?

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sprigatito · 09/06/2026 23:30

I would get him out of there, personally. He’s vulnerable because of his speech, he can’t articulate what’s wrong and it’s been a whole year. He dreads it enough that he mentions it every time he gets in the car.

I am not saying that something terrible is happening to him there - that’s very unlikely, though not impossible. But in his little mind, whatever is bothering him is bothering him a lot. I think your instincts are telling you this isn’t right.

irishchick93 · 09/06/2026 23:25

Bump

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irishchick93 · 09/06/2026 23:13

Not sure if this helps or hinders but i pay full days 7am-6pm and hes usually there 12noon - 4pm only.

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irishchick93 · 09/06/2026 23:12

@MissHavershamReturns a friend of mine works at the daycare and agrees he settles although she wouldnt know him well as shes an old friend from school.

His speech isnt great so he wouldnt be able to vocalise exactly what he doesnt like but i do see pics of him painting and dancing etc.

I know a lot of the staff as is my hometown so no my instincts would say he is being well looked after but i cant shake the guilt. I dont think its good for him to be stuck in the housewith me those days as i really need to rest for night shift and cant have him watching screentime all day. 🤯

He is quite demanding generally though as 2/3 year olds are 🤣

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MissHavershamReturns · 09/06/2026 23:03

Do you believe he really settles? Or do you think he just gives up because he knows he is there for the day at that point? Does he ever talk about enjoying any aspects?

MissHavershamReturns · 09/06/2026 23:03

This happened to us and we pulled out child out. I think it was too loud for him and the key worker also wasn’t kind. Are your instincts saying he needs to leave?

irishchick93 · 09/06/2026 23:02

@littlemisspickleshis key person & the manager call him a rascal and say your poor mum and you just settle in 5 mins. Theyve given ip giving him dinner though its alwaus a no yucky

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irishchick93 · 09/06/2026 23:01

Thanks @littlemisspickles
He can at times be clingy but is more than happy going to toddler mornings/grandparents house it does just seem to be here. Ive tried bribing saying we will get a toy on the way home dont really think he understands. Im really worried im going to traumatize him. 😪

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littlemisspickles · 09/06/2026 22:58

As a Mum, I remember how hard this was, my daughter cried for a whole term every day.
As someone who now works in a nursery, can he tell you what it is he doesn't like? Is he happy to be left with friends or family, or does that upset him? I would persevere with some childcare, otherwise school is a shock to the system if he is not used to being away from you, but a change of setting might help. What does his key person suggest? Can he take a transition toy, pictures of you or something that smells of you?
Best of luck,