Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To report my ex’s relationship with teacher to the school

280 replies

Yasminaschool · 08/06/2026 18:09

I have changed my user name for obvious reasons.

Ex and I have a very fractious relationship, despite my best efforts to keep things civil for our child’s sake. He has become increasingly nasty in recent weeks and is rubbing his new relationship in my face.

I’ve found out through a third party that the woman he is seeing is a teacher at our child’s primary school. My ex repeatedly denied this when I asked him but at the weekend admitted to this and sent me a string of gloating messages including graphic description of what she lets him do (stuff I was never keen on) and how he feels alive again after many miserable years. He said they both laughed when he told her about our lack of sex life. Really hurtful.

I know I shouldn’t but I really want to retaliate. My friend has suggested that a teacher needs to declare any relationship with a parent and that I should contact the school to raise this.

Is this too petty? Any other suggestions for revenge?

OP posts:
LadyLooo · 08/06/2026 18:12

This again?

The woman didn't write any of those messages, he did so why are you looking to get revenge on her for dating a single man?

I don't know what her contract says and nor do you, but you're barking up the wrong tree if it's her you want to get revenge on.

Leopardspota · 08/06/2026 18:12

It’s not a nice reflection on you that you’d try to get someone in trouble at work who hasn’t done anything to you. Your ex has told you she laughed, but you don’t know that. Even if she did… it’s personal not professional. It would be really nasty and vindictive to try to report her.

Tootiredtofuction88 · 08/06/2026 18:11

Report her for what? Having a relationship with another grown adult?!?

AfternoonTeaAddict · 08/06/2026 18:11

Revenge isn't going to help and might possibly backfire on you.

But being human I'd be tempted to tell her he is gloating about their sex life and passing on details to you. How revolting.

plims · 08/06/2026 18:10

You want to punish a woman for the behaviour of a man?