AIBU to expect proper condom disposal and not being left inside me?

Don’t listen to them. You did the right thing.

my inbox is always open xx

Oh OP. I feel sorry for you. I 53 and I’ve never had sex involving a condom in my life, so I didn’t know about knotting! But, discarding it inside your vagina is just nasty manners, and somewhat pointless as the semen is just going to see out of it. Yuck x1000.

But this one is really grim

You should never ever ever tell a woman that’s worried and scared about sec that they’re disgusting.

as a woman I want another woman to be able to discuss it! OP or in fact any WOMAN who needs advice about sex. I will always talk. Never feel upset or uncomfortable

No OP! You are NOT An idiot at all!’n

you’ve just got a bad boyfriend. Glad to hear your dumping him xx

But how????

im so confused at how this happens and no one notices??

I mean I get up to get cleaned up or wash my hands etc. I assumed most people do or am I the weird one? Which I light be! Don’t get me wrong. Km
happy to hear if others just lay there after or whatever.

Just when you think you’ve read everything on here. I mean is there no point at all after finishing sex that any part of his mind thinks ‘Hmmm that’s a bit odd, I wonder where that used condom went?, I’m sure it was around here somewhere…’ #looks briefly inside gf’s vag# ….. Aha! There you are!

When you finish having dex how does the clear up go?

im so confused. Do you not see him take it off and tie it etc?

or do you just go to sleep straight after?

mo one gets up to pee or clean up?

Please do not stay with him.

Honestly, I'd rather have a bit of loneliness and a few select, good friends than settle for just any man.

A rubbish man will not make you feel less lonely. It's more likely that a rubbish man and no friends will make the loneliness much, much worse. Because you'll be being made miserable AND have no friends.

People are trying to help you. Make some friends, build a life for yourself and don't just sleep with a man because he's shown interest. Be picky. It's what every woman should do.

I didn’t see you had the coil when you last posted. So you’re unlikely to be pregnant. You honestly do not need this waste of space in your life. Better off lonely.

From a male perspective:

Withdraw reasonably promptly after ejaculating so loss of erection doesn't risk 'spillage'.

Remove condom, again avoiding chance of spilling, knot it off and flush/bin.

Basic health education stuff.

But you had to ask an online forum if it was acceptable behaviour....
And you didn't immediately stop having sex when he ignored your discussion about the condom.

You have children... you can't afford to be so naive with sex and strangers.

It's a quote from a very well known poem ...

Warning, by Jenny Joseph.

You can make friends. From groups, hobby classes, online etc.

Much the same way you found this prince, but they won't violate you in this way.

That's what friends are for.

Well no because apparently he didn't reply... thats not acceptable discussion? You need to be an adult if you are having sex with strangers and make sure you are practicing safe sex.

If he didn't feel it come off, he sure as hell knew when he pulled out and there was no condom. So he purposely put you in an unsafe position.

I wonder if it’s his way of showing disgust and disdain for using condoms. Some men get really pissy about them and by sabotaging their proper use it’s a way of sending a message about how much he hates them. Even leaving them in your bed is saying “you can deal with them since you insist on them”. Which you were absolutely right to do of course, both as a double up on contraception and for broader sexual health reasons.

Sorry if I am being patronising but I used condoms for my main method of contraception for years due to being unable to use hormones and found it best to ‘take control’ of withdrawal myself so I could make sure it was done properly.