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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Its a parking one

58 replies

DeathStare · 06/06/2026 17:22

I live on a street with victorian terraced houses. It's not a main road and is very narrow, so parking is often a nightmare. There is no other parking nearby (we're off a main road with double yellow lines)

My neighbour (next door but one) has started parking one car on their paved front garden. It has no lowered kerb, no white line, nothing official saying nobody can park in front of it.

I came home earlier - with toddler and shopping - and there was no other parking space that would fit my car. So I parked outside their house blocking their car in.

They just came and asked me to move it so they can get the car out - which is fair enough and exactly what i expected. So I went straight out to move the car (with the toddler).

I pulled my car backwards so they could get out, then pulled forward into the same space to park there again. The neighbour pulled up next to me and said I'd have to move it again when he comes back so that he can park there again and basically told me to park somewhere else.

I said no. Im happy to move it if they need to get out but im not leaving a perfectly legal parking space (and then driving round the local area trying to find another one, in the rain with a toddler) when its not an official driveway and Im not moving it again so they can park there again.

Neighbour was really not happy and I half expect him to come and demand i move it when he gets back. AIBU?

OP posts:
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Original poster
DeathStare · 10/06/2026 06:36

saveforthat · 09/06/2026 20:04

Yes. It's almost impossible to believe isn't it?

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Yeah it surprised me as well. I'd have also thought it would be quicker to just go and talk to him than flyer 30 houses. I've not had a flyer yet so I suspect it may never happen. I asked him if they have flyers that specifically cover this situation and he said they had lots of different flyers and he'd go and have a look (i suspect the answer is no!)

Thinking about it, I've seen the police flyer cars sometimes on matchdays about considerate parking (put it under the windscreen wipers) but never on our street. So maybe he was just thinking of using some of those flyers (in which case the point will be lost on my neighbour who believes he's done nothing wrong).

I'll update if we ever actually get a flyer but I bet we don't 🤣

OP posts:
BasilParsley · 09/06/2026 21:00

Years ago when I was doing market research type stuff as a sideline, I had an appointment at an address on a small terraced street area with no off-road parking. It was crammed with cars parked up here and there. But! Oh! Hello! There's a perfectly legal parking space just three doors down from my appointment in which my car will fit perfectly! The Gods are smiling on me!

Happily parked up and knocked on the door of the interviewee, I was welcomed in and we sat and chatted through the questions. About half-way through I hear a continuous car beeping noise like someone was really angry. I mentioned it to my interviewee and asked what the beeping was all about. I was told quite nonchalantly "oh, maybe someone's parked on someone's space..."

Something niggled in my brain briefly but I thought nothing more of it until I left the house, got back to my car and as soon as I got into it, there was a VERY irate man banging on the window demanding to know why I parked there when it was HIS space!

I told him not to worry, I'm not ever going darken his road again, engaged gears and drove off! I really felt for those residents on that street though who had to deal with such a dick...

saveforthat · 09/06/2026 20:04

WhatHappenedToYourFurnitureCuz · 09/06/2026 19:48

I'm really shocked the police have the resources to flyer a whole street when they don't have the resources to investigate serious crimes. All for one shouty man.

Yes. It's almost impossible to believe isn't it?

WhatHappenedToYourFurnitureCuz · 09/06/2026 19:48

I'm really shocked the police have the resources to flyer a whole street when they don't have the resources to investigate serious crimes. All for one shouty man.

MyOtherProfile · 09/06/2026 19:33

Horrible. Hopefully he has had some communication now that shows him he doesn't own that bit of road.

Original poster
DeathStare · 09/06/2026 18:55

Rose213 · 08/06/2026 19:15

Probably would have been easier for you to park elsewhere wouldn't it?

honestly, I know you shouldn't have to but you don't know what and who you are dealing with. Just stop parking there, you've even said you are shaking and he's banging on the door, waking your kid up.

I would report it to the police but after that stop parking there, it seems like a battle you won't win.

Show quote history

I never park if there's another space. We have other neighbours who like to park outside their houses if they can for various reasons.

However there often isn't much choice. We live on a small terraced street not designed for parking and most households have at least one car if not more.

There is a main road with no parking round the corner and other nearby streets are mainly residents only parking. There is a huge school on the main road and sixth formers often park on our road. There is also a business across the road whose employees often park here. As well as that, 5 minutes walk down the main road is a major local sports venue (with limited parking). Plus we are 5 minutes walk from a local public transport link to premiership football ground (imagine we are one tube stop from the Emirates - similar to that).

So parking is a nightmare. If I hadn't parked in that space I'd have probably been driving round for 15 minutes snd ended up parking on residents only street 10 minutes walk away (with a toddler, shopping and no pram) in the rain, and then have had to have walked back to my car two hours later (with toddler in the rain) to go and move the car and begin hunting for another space.

The only other space on our road at that time was (ironically) right outside my house (so better for me!) but there is no way in hell my car would have fit in it. His car, on the other hand would easily have fit in it, but for some reason he wouldn't park there - just kept telling me to even though mine clearly wouldn't fit.

Also if I hasn't parked there, somebody else would have. It doesn't look like a driveway (because it isn't) and there is mo lowered kerb and no road markings or sign indicating not to park there. When the car isn't parked there (like it wasn't when he came hammering) it looks like any other spot on the road. Other people park there all the time when his car isn't there (and sometimes when it is).

OP posts:
Original poster
DeathStare · 09/06/2026 18:37

superspideysense · 07/06/2026 20:42

He didn’t hit your car did he when he managed to get in last night?

id be careful. And like PP said he won’t just stop. He’s been called out and won’t like it. especially when those flyers go out.

gotta say I’m impressed the police called back and seem willing to help.

No he hadn't hit my car. If he had the damage would have been on the front of his car.

OP posts:
Yetone · 08/06/2026 23:31

SunnyRedSnail · 06/06/2026 19:08

I had this EXACT same issue with a terrace house in Oxford! We had an "offroad parking space" but didn't have a dropped kerb, so it wasn't actually a parking space.

Legally, if we were parked on the drive, then other cars were not allowed to block us in, but if no car was parked, then as there was no dropped kerb then anyone could park there, which was fair enough.

The council wouldn't let us drop the kerb as they said it would then remove TWO road parking spaces (as the dropped bit has to be wide enough for a car to enter the driveway at an angle).

My housemate would usually park on the drive then I'd block him in if I couldn't find another space, and move my car if needed. I'd also often block the driveway if he was out so I saved the driveway space for him. It was a faff but did mean we both had a space with a bit of car moving.

Unless you have a dropped kerb then you are not supposed to drive over it. When they drop the kerb they also strengthen the pavement so a car can drive over it.

Iexpecttobetired · 08/06/2026 23:04

Sulgari · 08/06/2026 21:09

I think you’re being a bit arsey, parking over his house access

When you pay to have the kerb lowered utility plans check what utilities are under the kerb, and they are moved as neccesary. Someone ramming a car up and down a pavement multiple times a day risks the services to OPs house. Plus OP has said it is a busy road with limited parking, you cannot just claim part of that road for your own personal use.

saveforthat · 08/06/2026 23:00

I'm amazed how helpful the police are being.

eastegg · 08/06/2026 22:53

Sulgari · 08/06/2026 21:09

I think you’re being a bit arsey, parking over his house access

It’s not house access. It’s a pavement that cars are not allowed to drive over. The description of a pavement on which cars are not allowed as ‘house access’ couldn’t be more wrong.

eastegg · 08/06/2026 22:47

So glad you’ve stood up for yourself and that you’re getting some back up from the police OP. It’s difficult standing up to bullies but I think you’re doing the right thing.

I was very drawn to this thread because it reminded me of a similar situation I was in years ago. My nemesis was a woman who lived next door to my child’s nursery and had a similar paved/gravelled area outside her house with no dropped kerb. They kept a sports car with a cover over it on the ‘drive’ and liked to use the space in front for the car they actually drove, and confronted me one day when I was getting my toddler into the car. She tried to rely on an ‘H-bar’ painted on the road but she’d clearly painted it herself!

I’m glad most people have agreed with you here. I remember on my thread someone calling me a ‘belligerent twat’ for the mere act of wondering whether I should stand up to the bully and park in the same spot again! I think a couple of those types are starting to drift to this thread actually.

I’m sorry you’re having to deal with this while looking after a toddler on your own, that’s not nice.

SpringsOnTheWay · 08/06/2026 21:13

What a cock womble. Have you got a ring doorbell?

Sulgari · 08/06/2026 21:09

I think you’re being a bit arsey, parking over his house access

Ladygardenerinderby · 08/06/2026 21:05

This is now threatening behaviour as well as him being an arse . I’d ring the police and show them the video footage , he sounds like a bully . Take care

Rose213 · 08/06/2026 19:21

Just read your updates after that. Fair play seems like you've stood your ground. Well done, maybe I am just a pushover lol

Rose213 · 08/06/2026 19:15

DeathStare · 06/06/2026 20:25

UPDATE

I'm shaking.

He came back about 15 minutes ago. Im already in bed as I'm not feeling well and toddler was asleep. He absolutely hammered on my door until I went down.

By the time I got downstairs he was sat in the car in the road outside my house. When I opened my front door he screamed at me from the car that I need to move my car so he can access his "drive". (Its not a drive).

I said no I wasn't moving the car and I was going back in as I had a toddler in the house. He carried on screaming at me to move the car and then said "if youre not going to move it, its not my responsibility if anything happens to your car". Then he screached his car to level with mine and started trying to manouvere his car round mine to get his on his "drive".

Given what he'd said about my car getting damaged, I started videoing him from my path and he started screaming at me again that if I could video him, I could move the car.

I probably should have stayed videoing but I was pretty shaken and I could hear the toddler had woken up in the house so I went back in.

A few minutes later he is relentlessly hammering on the door again. Apparently he has managed to maouvere his car onto his paved garden past mine. He says "Just to let you know im going out at 7.30am so Ill need you to move it" (not said nicely!) So I said "fine if you need me to move it, ill move it for you to get out" .

So he says "so you'll move it for me to get out?" And I said "yes if you need me to" And he said "Ive changed my mind. I'm going out again now. I need you to move it again now" So I just said "no" and he started arguing with me that I'd said I'd move it if he needed to get his car out. He was shouting at me again that the council have told him he can park his car there and has a right to access and that I'm inconsiderate.

I just shut the door and went back in but I'm still shaking

Probably would have been easier for you to park elsewhere wouldn't it?

honestly, I know you shouldn't have to but you don't know what and who you are dealing with. Just stop parking there, you've even said you are shaking and he's banging on the door, waking your kid up.

I would report it to the police but after that stop parking there, it seems like a battle you won't win.

Whammyammy · 07/06/2026 20:59

Great update btw

Whammyammy · 07/06/2026 20:58

FridayOnMyMind · 06/06/2026 18:01

Although the posts about him not being allowed to drive across the path are correct it’s worth remembering that if he doesn’t then he’ll just be using the space on the road in front of it, so the street isn’t gaining a space by using the one in front of his house if it results in him parking in the street again.

This being the case, is it worth getting into a dispute over?

Agreed. But the space on the road is for everyone. His diy garden with aspirations drive would be just for him, thus preventing others from using the space.

Op you did right. Your neighbour is a twat

superspideysense · 07/06/2026 20:42

He didn’t hit your car did he when he managed to get in last night?

id be careful. And like PP said he won’t just stop. He’s been called out and won’t like it. especially when those flyers go out.

gotta say I’m impressed the police called back and seem willing to help.

Nearly50omg · 07/06/2026 19:04

He won’t “move on“ from that - men like that unless you let the police do their job unfortunately

Original poster
DeathStare · 07/06/2026 18:52

superspideysense · 07/06/2026 18:11

@DeathStarehow have things been today?

Thank you for asking. After screaming at me last night that he was going out at 7.30am, he hammerd on my door at about noon telling me to move the car. He wasn't shouting but was pretty rude/brusque/arsey. Just kept telling me how inconsiderate I am.

I'd really love him to explain how hammering on the door of a single woman at night, shouting and screaming, waking up a sleeping toddler, and threatening to damage my car if I didn't move my car ie if I didn't get myself and the toddler dressed and go and park streets away, all so he could park (illegally) exactly where he wants to, makes him the reasonable one. Anyhow I digress...

Today he was fairly arsey and I just stayed calm and cheerful. I very calmly wouldn't move my car until I explained to him what the police had said. He told the police don't know what they are talking about as the council had said it was fine! Just before I moved the car I said I was surprised not to see him at 7.30 and he said because he's a nice neighbour unlike me he cycled to mass to avoid disturbing me (even though i told him I'm up at 6am every day. Which was odd because last night he said he was taking his son out for a driving lesson at 7.30am plus I never saw him out on his bike this morning 🤣 Anyway I don't believe a word of it just like I don't believe the council have told him what he says they've told him.

Last night someone played loud music until really late which is really unusual for round here. Couldn't quite work out which house it was but I suspect it was him. He will be gutted to know loud music doesn't really bother me and toddler sleeps through most things except someone hammering on the door. Today he looked hungover to be honest.

The police rang back and asked if I wanted them to go and give him a warning and I said no - I'd rather he just moves on from the whole incident given how volatile and aggressive he clearly is. They said they will probably flyer the whole street with flyers explaining parking on your front garden isn't legal and that nobody owns the spot outside their house. They also said there is now a log on my address and has address so if he comes back hammering on my door to phone 999 and they will come out, and if anyone else calls about him they will also come out.

I walked past his car this evening and he's clearly reversed it into something since I last walked past the back end of it. Karma 🤣

OP posts:
superspideysense · 07/06/2026 18:11

@DeathStarehow have things been today?

Davros · 06/06/2026 22:45

Many councils won’t give permission for dropped kerbs any more. Mine won’t

SunnyRedSnail · 06/06/2026 22:33

DeathStare · 06/06/2026 17:54

I said that. He said that the council had told him he was fine to park there.

Show quote history

Unlikely.

To have a dropped kerb put in, it would need a distance of 5m from the front of the house and the pavement, then 1.2 m free in front of the door for emergency access.

If he can't even park a small car without overlapping the pavement then there's no way he meets criteria for a dropped kerb!

Log any further aggressive behaviour with the police and do NOT move your car tomorrow as if he got it on the drive he can get it off.

Also get a dash cam for your car!