To wonder why we have more than one child?

I just wanted to say that comments on this thread are quite sad. Do some posters realise how cruel they are when talking about having "only' children? Many people have just one due to health issues, or the death of another child. Telling people their children are destined to be lonely and have no support In the future when there are many reasons people only have one is very insensitive

It’s built into most people to have a drive to keep the population going. This one and done term makes me cringe. Like it’s a badge of honour. Crack on, no one really cares

I'm an only child and always craved a sibling so for me, it was important to have more than one.

You could also argue that people love the first one so much they can’t imagine sharing that love with another child. I’ve got one and I feel like that sometimes. I’d probably have had another one if it had been practical at the time but it wasn’t. Sometimes I feel like I love him so much I couldn’t imagine sharing that love with another child

I was super broody in my 20’s which is why I had four. I never found having that many children hard work ( had my moment, obviously!). Now they are grown I feel I’m reaping the rewards of having a bigger family.

It sounds awful but way back when it was simply to ensure if one died, we had a back up. Of course lack of birth control meant we just had lots but from a biological sense, we ensured we definitely had someone to replace us if it went wrong at some stage with the first…

Plus also getting away from biological urges, not everyone feels the way you do about parenting. For many people it’s an utter joy and they enjoy having a few children never mind two.

Hugely reinforced by societal conditioning.

As someone who grew up as an only child the pressure to be everything to the expectant parents was huge. Add to that the loneliness, boredom and constant monitoring of where I was, who I was with and who were my friends what I said and who I said it to.
The talks on how I could do better and being told that being an only child was a privilege that I had such attention.

it was more like a prison.

I envied those children who my parents would look down upon. Those children who came from big families who’s parents only had time for a cursory glance in their direction

This. Surely the answer is blindingly obvious. You have a second child for the same
reasons you have the first - your hormones. It’s a nice idea that we are all logical and evolved and fully in control of all our decisions but the reality is we are all driven by our hormones in turn the resulting the biological imperative to replace the species for which 2+ children per pair of parents is the basic requirement.

I have four girls and love it! My eldest 2 are adults now and them a teen and a pre teen. I was an only child and always said if I had one I’d have another.

Just let your child bring a friend, or buy the family ticket anyway?

I'm not close to my brother so I didn't do it to give my child a sibling. I just really, really wanted another baby in a similar way to the way I'd wanted the first one. And then I really wanted another one after that! I'd have probably liked to have a 4th too, but DH put his foot down and we stopped at three.

And I can’t understand this view! I can’t imagine any reason why my two would have had better lives without the other one

Some strange responses on here.
Things change a lot as children grow up.

Having more than one when they are small is hard but when they are older they can entertain each other, support each other and both have someone else close to rely on.
I am so glad I have a sibling now my parents are elderly and that I don't have to deal with the issues around that on my own.

I have two and, yes, it was hard when they were small but they are each other's biggest supporters and have become close friends as they have grown up.

First reply nails it! This was me too. Two kids would have broken me.

Because we are too young to remember what we were like at that age with our siblings.

I didn't.Ds is 12 and it was the best decision for us.

I have three. They've always got on well, bar the normal minor sibling squabbles. They have definitely enhanced each other's lives far more than reduced them. They are older now and adore each other. They champion each other as much as I champion them. I get a lot of joy from knowing that they have each other.

I didn’t want my son to be an only. And now at 23 and 21, I can conclude that watching them grow together and interact alongside each other and share experiences through the years, has been the single best part of parenting.

Why not?

I had a second so my oldest has a sibling. I grew up an only child and could never put my own child through that, only having one was never an option.

I have absolutely no idea😂 I’m an only and I have an only.
Parents with 2 or more seem far more stressed, overwhelmed (and poorer!)
The only time I have wished for a sibling in 50 years is now - providing support for my elderly widowed mum.

Speaking as an only child - what a load of rubbish! I was very happy being an only and never wanted a sibling. My mother was also an only and presumably didn't find it so terrible that she felt the need to have more than one herself.

I had two close together and found it very easy but they were fairly chilled kids and I was in my twenties. I decided I wanted another in my thirties and had one at 37. I love him but it’s so hard. I have no idea why I did it.