Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU to object after he assumed he and his daughter would move in?

389 replies

Trombolice · 04/06/2026 15:17

Name changed for this.

Been seeing someone for around a year and a half. This morning he casually dropped it into conversation that his daughter might have to move schools when they move. I asked where he was moving to and he said “I mean when we move in together?”

I said “who said anything about moving in together??” So he said “well not now obviously but at some point we will surely?” So I said “and where are you assuming we’ll live?”

Long story short he had it in his head that he and his daughter would be moving in to my house. His rationale is that I have “so much more space” and much more space than I need and it’s selfish to not want to share it.

I said I have no intention of having anyone live with me! He’s now gone off on a major strop saying I have too many unused bedrooms and it’s “unfair” etc

I think he has got his daughter believing they will be moving in to my house too. They live in a two bedroom house.

AIBU??

OP posts:
DierdreDaphne · 04/06/2026 15:25

Error404FucksNotFound · 04/06/2026 15:20

Yanbu.
He had it all planned out, didnt he?
Was he dating you or your house?

Excellent! 😂

LadyGaGasPokerFace · 04/06/2026 15:25

Well it seems he’s been in the relationship for the long game. Firmly trying to get his feet under the table and he’s just tested the waters to see if he can worm himself in. I wouldn’t want someone else’s child living in my house either. Yes, they come as a package, but it’s for you to suggest the moving in, not him to try and plan.

theemmadilemma · 04/06/2026 15:25

Cocklodger alert.

You'll be a nanny with a fanny next.

DewDropsAndCobWebs · 04/06/2026 15:23

So he already has a bedroom, one for him and one for his DD, at his house? Why does he need more space than that? And if he needed more, what would he do to rectify that if you weren't together?

ThatsMargaretyoubigot · 04/06/2026 15:22

🚨Cocklodger alert 🚨

Raven08 · 04/06/2026 15:22

Run for the hills!

Lmnop22 · 04/06/2026 15:21

You don’t have to move anyone into your house if you don’t want to so YANBU.

However, I don’t really blame him for thinking that it might be a natural progression of your relationship if you’ve never told him it’s not what you want. Provided, of course, he was paying his fair share and the legalities were ironed out to protect your interests….

ChaToilLeam · 04/06/2026 15:21

I think that's due a breakup right away! Entitled so-and-so!

Ohthatsabitshit · 04/06/2026 15:21

What a weirdo. You’ve told him firmly so it should be settled.

BeardySchnauzer · 04/06/2026 15:21

I mean I don’t think it’s odd that he may have thought you would move in together at some point

but his reasoning is all wonky and it’s odd he’s just made an assumption when you’ve clearly never discussed it before

how old is his daughter? Surely you don’t know her that well if you’ve only been dating a year

Tontostitis · 04/06/2026 15:21

When I was single this used to happen to me all the time every bloody boyfriend wanted to move in. I knew I'd met the right man when I wanted him to move in and he had options that we discussed before he did.

Error404FucksNotFound · 04/06/2026 15:20

Yanbu.
He had it all planned out, didnt he?
Was he dating you or your house?

RoseField1 · 04/06/2026 15:19

Does he own or rent? Do you have kids?
Have you never had conversation about potentially moving in at some point?
I don't blame you for saying no way never by the way!

BoogieVoogieAllNightLong · 04/06/2026 15:19

YANBU

What a cheek to think he's entitled to your property without even a discussion.

Swipe left for the next trending thread