AIBU to feel angry about my husband's £1000 a month car?

I read it as you were saying he was show off by buying a nice car. If you weren’t I apologise

@OonaStubbs i agree completely- they are merely a status symbol!

Id be fuming and do everything in my powers to force him to return it! Controlling? So what!

I don’t see the problem. At all.

All the comments about status, impressing people etc are just nonsense.

Like most people, he chose a car that he liked and that he could afford.

If he couldn’t afford the car, that would be an issue. But that’s not the situation. Most people chose cars based on their affordability.

In your opinion

the same for expensive watches that just tell the time? Shoes that just cover your feet? Is anything expensive worth it?

As I said I do not get the show off thing I DID say I buy things that I enjoy and give me pleasure these may be expensive or may not in fact my decision is based on what gives me pleasure not ever what others think😒 so I think you missed the point🙄

Crikey, yeah I earn not that far off his salary and am busy umming and ahhing about whether to keep running my 14 year old Yaris or to splurge and buy a new (to me) car that's maybe 5-6 years old. My mind is boggled, but it's equally boggled by my friends who earn good salaries but complain regularly that they can't have as nice a life as they think they deserve while also spending £400 per month on a car.

Expensive cars are a waste of money, they all just get you from A to B.

I was wondering the same thing!

Yer a long time dead.
As long as there’s money for the basics and essentials, crack on I say.

The annoying thing is you say you have a larger share in the house - however that’s not necessarily a good thing as he has benefitted enormously by paying less mortgage - I don’t think that is fair at all tbh!

I mean yes if you separated you would own a larger share but then even if you didn’t yes a high earner so you would probably have got more of a share iyswim

Maybe this is why he doesn’t want to invest in the house? Because he knows if he pays 20k for a new bathroom he’s only getting a percentage of the increase in value it would create?

Or is it the case that you ringfenced a figure ie £100,000 rather than a percentage?

These threads are always full of people driving 20 year old cars on massive salaries but it's not always a very good idea. Our 2013 car cost over £1k at the last service and MOT and if I put the reg numbers of my 2003 and 2007 cars into a checker they are both now scrapped. There is a happy medium.

£1k a month is a lot but someone has to buy or lease new cars for there to be some for the rest of us to get secondhand!

Range Rover, Porsche, high level model BMW, Mercedes……..loads really.

What car costs £1000 a month?

So don't buy household items unless they need replacing (in which case you should both contribute) and buy yourself something you like or save your money.

Who is he trying to impress?

I like my cars and have a couple that would cost more than 1k a month if I leased them. I can afford it so it’s a non issue for me.

I'm on the fence. We have always had separate finances - married for 35 years.

When the house was paid for, when all the future school fees were accounted and the DC,.as children, had starter houses in Trust, DH brought home what I referred to as the wank mobile. It was very expensive, albeit two years old. He is now mid 60s and is being a bit more sensible.

It was his money, earnt by him and we had everything else we wanted. He wouldn't have done it if we'd needed a new bathroom. Therefore, although there was no consultation, I wasn't cross with him.

What car is it before I start judging !!

Yes, I agree this could be a significant factor in how you feel about the car.

When did his concern over image/status start?

’let him’….? It’s his money. Yes you do sound controlling. Just because you don’t want to splash out on things like haircuts and cars it doesn’t mean he should have to do the same

If he's taking it from "his" money, that's his choice, if a man bought a car and wasn't paying the bills and feeding his kids, that's different. Some people think it's crazy to spend hundreds on hair/nails/botox etc.
Personally I'd do neither.

How do I get to earn 300k please?! 😂

You wouldn’t see someone again because they chose to spend their own money on themselves? That is breathtakingly controlling, my god.

Sometimes people just buy nice things because they like them, not to show off.

its not always about other people

I never understand the showy off culture thing its not as if having more money makes you a more worthy person or more worth respecting! so I do not see the point of buying stuff to show off. I buy things I like, can afford and give me personal pleasure, full stop. If it were my husband I would be very annoyed too😳