Been with boyfriend for coming up to 5 years. He gets really moody if it’s been over a week of no sex (sometimes pushing two weeks). I have quite a few health problems and so honestly am not in the mood a lot of the time due to being in pain/feeling sick or being exhausted.
He has quite a lot on his plate in the way that there are things in his life making him unhappy. But whenever I see him and there’s a missed opportunity for sex, I feel like his mood changes and he’s just in a bad one. And as the week goes on/if we go into a second week or potentially over that, his mood gets worse.
i understand that having sex is a stress release for him and it cheers him up, but at the moment I feel responsible for his happiness in that the pressure is put on me to do something I don’t actually want to do to make him happy - when he’s being a grump all the time. He’s not really ever affectionate outside of having sex. There are times when I’ve pulled him up on this and he has been more affectionate when he knows that making the effort a bit more consistently will more often lead to more sex. But he just has no drive to actually be remotely romantic or affectionate with me, and is constantly in a grouch if we’ve been together and he’s realised there’s not going to be any sex.
i don’t really know how to get out of this pattern. I’ve been so patient and understanding so far but I’ve kind of got to the end of my patience now with it.
I know he has needs, but AIBU for getting annoyed at this? Is once a week/once every other week enough?
Has anyone else dealt with this?
We don’t have any kids - I’m just a lurker on mumsnet 😂